STUNG Comedy Play Scene from the play "Between Good and Evil" by D. M. Larson
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Field. Day. A woman, June, screams! She is on the ground holding her foot. She shakes her leg and screams some more. AH! Hank runs out to see what's wrong. What happened? I got stung by a bee... on the foot... Let me see. June flops down and holds up her foot. (CONT.) Okay, let me get the stinger out. I hear if you can get it out without squeezing the little venom bag then it won't hurt as much. Ow! Ow! Ow! Get it out! June is shaking her foot. Hold still! June tries to stop struggling. Hank carefully gets it with one finger. (CONT.) There. Still hurts. She shakes her foot at him. Hank struggles and then holds her leg still again and looks.
Looks like there is a bit of stinger in there still. Get it out! I'm going to need to tweezers or something. Get some tweezers! Okay, okay! Hank runs off. *Various people can walk by and try to ignore June and make gestures and faces if desired* by and sees June on her back moaning and holding her foot in the air. Molly walks Uh... you okay? No... Can I help? I don't know... Tell me what's wrong and I'll see what I can do? I got stung by a bee. How did you get stung? I stopped to smell the roses. What? You know how they tell you to stop and smell the roses? They?
Well, sometimes you hear that. You do? Oh geez, never mind. Do bee stings make people cranky? Yes! Oh... so why were you barefoot? Because I wanted to be one with nature! I love nature! June starts ripping at and throws the rose. (CONT.) Weeee! Weee! Weee! OW! June has hurt her hand now. What happened? Nature gave me some more good loving! Thorn. June sucks on her thumb. Nature doesn't love you back. What did I ever do to nature? I try to be good. I try to leave a small carbon footprint. I have a hybrid car. I use recycled toilet paper... Recycled toilet paper... sorry, but that just sounds gross. It is just recycled paper... it wasn't used in a toilet before... well, I don't think so...
Now I don't feel so good. Don't like potty talk? Not really. Poop scares me. That's too bad because I think you stepped in some. Uh! Nature strikes again... see ya... Molly exits and drags her foot/shoe on the ground trying to get some poop off. June sighs... a little old man, Don, shuffles out. June ignores him. Don pokes her with his walking stick/cane. Hey! Hey you back. Get off my lawn. This your lawn? Yup... get off. But I can't walk... I'm injured... She holds her foot up to Don. He gets out his glasses and looks at her foot closely. He smells something bad and back away. Wow, that's quite a stink. That's not my foot... some dog pooped on your lawn. Dag-nabbit! Darn dang dogs! Such language in front of a lady.
You're just a hippy. Did you rip up my flowers? Um... You hippies ain't got no respect for property! Look... don't get all worked up now... Don is grabs his chest and falls on top of June. (CONT.) He got worked up. Hank runs back in with tweezers. I got the... Hank sees old man on top of June. (CONT.) Um... I'm not sure the tweezers can remove that... Get him off! Hank picks up Don and struggles with him and ends up falling and having Don on top of him. June looks and holds up her foot. (CONT.) Can you get the thorn out now... please? Molly crosses the stage dragging her foot. Pooh! Hate the smell of pooh! Lights fade to black. END OF PLAY