Funeral Ceremonies (Antam Sanskar)

Transcription

1 Sikh Reht Maryada Funeral Ceremonies (Antam Sanskar) Article XIX a. The body of a dying or dead person, if it is on a cot, must not be taken off the cot and put on the floor. Nor must a lit lamp be placed beside, or a cow got bestowed in donation by, him/her or for his/her good or any other ceremony, contrary to Guru's way, performed. Only Gurbani should be recited or "Waheguru, Waheguru" repeated by his/her side. b. When someone shuffles the mortal coil, the survivors must not grieve or raise a hue and cry or indulge in breast beating. To induce a mood of resignation to God's will, it is desirable to recite Gurbani or repeat "Waheguru". c. However young the deceased may be, the body should be cremated. However, where arrangements for cremation cannot be made, there should be no qualm about the body being immersed in flowing water or disposed of in any other manner. d. As to the time of cremation, no consideration as to whether it should take place during day or night should weigh. e. The dead body should be bathed and clothed in clean clothes. While that is done, the Sikh symbols-comb, kachha, karha, kirpan-should not be taken off. Thereafter putting the body on a plank, Ardas about its being taken away for disposal be offered. The hearse should then be lifted and taken to the cremation ground. While the body is being carried to the cremation ground, hymns that induce feelings of detachment should be recited. On reaching the cremation ground, the pyre should be laid. Then the Ardas for consigning the body to fire be offered. The dead body should then be placed on the pyre and the son or any other relation or friend of the deceased should set fire to it. The accompanying congregation should sit at a reasonable distance and listen to kirtan or carry on collective singing of hymns or recitation of detachment-inducing hymns. When the pyre is fully aflame, the Kirtan Sohila (prescribed preretirement night Scriptural prayer) be recited and the Ardas offered. (Piercing the skull half an hour or so after the pyre has been during with a rod or something else in the belief that will secure the release of the soul- kapal kriya-is contrary to the Guru's tenets). The congregation should then leave. Coming back home, a reading of the Guru Granth Sahib should be commenced at home or in a nearby Gurdwara, and after reciting the six stanzas of the Anand Sahib, the Ardas, offered and Karhah prashad (sacred pudding) distributed. The reading of the Guru Granth Sahib should be completed on the tenth day. If the reading cannot, or is sought not to, be completed on the tenth day, some other day may be appointed for the conclusion of the reading having regard to the convenience of the relatives. The reading of the Guru Granth Sahib should be carried out by the members of the household of the deceased and relatives in cooperation. If possible, Kirtan may be held every night. No funeral ceremony remains to be performed after the "tenth day." f. When the pyre is burnt out, the whole bulk of the ashes, including the burnt bones should be gathered up and immersed in flowing water or buried at that very place and the ground

2 leveled. Raising a monument to the memory of the deceased at the place where his dead body is cremated is taboo. g. Adh Marg (the ceremony of breaking the pot used for bathing the dead body amid doleful cries half way towards the cremation ground), organized lamentation by women, foorhi (sitting on a straw mat in mourning for a certain period), diva (keeping an oil lamp lit for 360 days after the death in the belief that that will light the path of the deceased), Pind (ritual donating of lumps of rice flour, oat flour, or solidified milk (khoa) for ten days after death), kirya (concluding the funeral proceedings ritualistically, serving meals and making offerings by way of Shradh, Budha marna (waving of whisk, over the hearse of an old person's dead body and decorating the hearse with festoons), etc. are contrary to the approved code. So too is the picking of the burnt bones from the ashes of the pyre for immersing in the Ganga, at Patalpuri (Kiratpur), at Kartarpur Sahib or at any other such place. Things to know: 1. Direct Cremation Body is bathed (by funeral home) when they receive the body; few family members can view and dress the body (dressing can be done by the funeral home), followed by cremation. 2. Open Casket Viewing Body is bathed (by funeral home) when they receive the body; family members can dress the body (dressing can be done by the funeral home). Body is embalmed for viewing; cosmetics etc. needed. 1 hour viewing, followed by cremation. A 3-4 hour viewing is billed accordingly. (Embalming is required by law for viewing purposes. This is where the costs go up dramatically.) 3. Handling of flowers is extra. 4. Hearse to the crematorium is an extra cost instead of van. 5. Casket included for cremation is not wooden. If wooden, cost is extra depending on the choice of casket. 6. The funeral homes can accommodate any and all requests but please note that this is where they make their money. This is their business. 7. Newspaper submission is billed by Funeral Homes at actuals. 8. All required certificates by/or handled by Funeral Homes are billed at actuals. 9. It is advisable to request multiple original death certificates at this stage. The larger the portfolio the more original death certificates are needed. It is much easier to order them at this stage. Note: These two Funeral Homes know about the Sikh tradition. They will remove chairs to accommodate floor sitting etc. Hamden Funeral Home: Will have white sheets laid out.

3 Please identify that you are from the Sikh Community. It will make their job easier and you will also be more comfortable. Hamden Funeral home has put together 2 cremation packages for your convenience. Why these 2 Funeral Homes: There are close to the Gurdwaras. By law no refreshments can be served at funeral homes. Being near a Gurdwara, sangat that is coming from a distance can use the Gurdwara facilities and in many cases it may be easier for the grieving family. Hoyt Cognetta Funeral Home & Crematory 5 East Wall Street, Norwalk, CT Contact: John Lesko Price range - $2,935 for direct cremation embalming, etc. are extra s. Direct Cremation Package - A $1, includes: Removal from place of death Medical examiner s fee Filing of paper work at Town Hall and receiving permits Funeral director brings remains to crematory 1300 Dixwell Avenue Hamden, CT Extras: Use of funeral home to dress deceased $100 Family Crematory. Prayer service and start cremation process. Extra $100 use of crematory facilities Cremation at crematory is usually in the morning. Crematories close at 3 pm unless specified for service. Cremation after business hours is an extra $370.

4 Package B Visitation and viewing/service at funeral home $3, Includes: Removal from place of death Embalming for viewing Dressing/casketing and hair dressing Cremation casket Visitation at Funeral Home Transport to crematory/in mini van Prayer service/start cremation process at crematory Extras: Hearse in procession $300 to crematory All packages: Certified copies of Death Certificate are extra, $20.00 per copy Newspaper notices, calculated by individual newspapers. Prices effective as of September 16, Prices subject to change. Contact: Scott DeMarco Frequently Asked Questions Q: Exactly what happens at the crematory? A: The deceased is placed in the cremation chamber known as a retort. After cremation, metal from clothing and implants is separated. The remains are processed further through pulverization and then placed in a selected urn. The ashes are then transported to the appropriate party based upon the family's wishes. Q: What happens to medical devices such as hip implants and pacemakers? A: Fragments of metal are separated and removed prior to pulverization. Pacemakers, which have an explosive risk, are required to be removed prior to cremation. Q: What do cremated remains that are returned to the family look like? A: The quantity of cremated remains of an adult is comparable to the size of a 6 inch square box. The appearance resembles crushed seashells. The remains are placed in a plastic bag inside the urn selected by the family.

5 Q: If my family knows I want cremation, is that all I need to do in advance? A: No. Just stating your wishes will not necessarily assure their being honored. To assure your wishes will be honored and to prevent your survivors from having to make decisions and arrangements at the time of your death, you can choose a cremation provider and prearrange your cremation. The cremation provider can also keep the personal data and authorizations which will be required for your death certificate, so that your survivors will not have to be asked for this information during an emotional time. You may also prepay the expenses of your cremation if allowed by state law. Q: Why should I prepay for my cremation service? A: The main reason is to safeguard against inflation. If fully funded the cremation cost will be completely covered at the time of death. This is accomplished through an irrevocable guaranteed contract. This can be advantageous as circumstances change and funds become depleted. Another advantage is that important personal information collected as part of the pre-arrangement is obtained prior to death. This information is beneficial for obituary notices and possible monetary benefits for the family. (While this is what the Funeral Homes recommend it is advisable not to do this as many have gone out of business or have been bought over and they tend not to honor previous contracts.) Q: Is cremation less expensive than a traditional burial? A: In most circumstances cremation can be less expensive. Q: If I don't have a funeral with the body present, I would still like to have some sort of ceremony so that family, friends, and associates can gather to commemorate the event. What are my choices? A: Cremation offers a wide array of ceremonies to choose from. Your family may have the chance to have a final viewing and pay their last respects prior to the cremation. A memorial service can be held in a place of worship or at the cremation provider's facility, with or without the cremated remains. This can be delayed as long as necessary after the death to allow family and friends to gather from distant locations. A scattering ceremony offers a personal touch only cremation can provide. Q: Is A Casket Needed For Cremation? A: No, a casket is not required for cremation. All that is required is an alternative container which is cremated with the body; this can be cardboard or unfinished pine. Q: Is Embalming Required Prior To Cremation? A: No. There are no state laws require embalming prior to cremation.

6 Q: Can The Body Be Viewed Without Embalming? A: Yes, immediate family members may briefly view the deceased prior to cremation in a private viewing area. Q: Can The Family Witness The Cremation? A: Yes, family members can be present when the body is placed into the cremation chamber. Q: What Can Be Done With The Cremated Remains? A: There are many options. Remains can be buried in a cemetery lot or cremation garden, inurned in a columbarium, kept at home, or scattered on private property. The funeral home staff will be happy to discuss these options with you and make any arrangements. Body Donation Program The University of Connecticut School of Medicine gratefully accepts the donation of bodies for teaching and medical research. Information about body donation through our Anatomical Donation Program is provided below. For more details and to obtain the necessary forms, contact the Anatomical Donation Program at The office is open Monday through Friday from 7:30 a.m. to 4 p.m. During non-business hours, you may call the 24-hour answering service at Procedures Prospective donors should inform family members of their wish to donate their body. It is usually not sufficient to include intentions about body donation in wills, because there is a time limit for accepting the body after death (within 48 hours) and wills often are read after the time limit. The Health Center provides prospective donors with a laminated identification card for their wallets with information about their wish to donate their body. Transporting the Body When a donor dies, family members should contact the Anatomical Donation Program immediately after a doctor or nurse has made a pronouncement of death.

7 The body will be taken to the Health Center at no cost to the deceased by a licensed funeral director working with the Anatomical Donation Program. The body is embalmed, prepared, and stored securely until it is needed for teaching purposes. It is not sold or loaned to other universities or research programs. The Health Center cannot accept bodies from people who die outside of Connecticut. Donors who relocate should notify the Anatomical Donation Program. Those who remain interested in anatomical donation should contact a medical school in their new state of residence. Conditions that May Interfere with Donation Although age is not a factor, some conditions make a body unsuitable for teaching and educational purposes. These conditions include obesity or extreme underweight, edema or swelling, dehydration, an autopsy, or infectious disease. Representatives of the Anatomical Donation Program can provide more information about conditions that may interfere with donation and they will evaluate the body at the time of death to determine its suitability for teaching and research purposes. Donations for Transplantation For those who wish to donate their body for teaching purposes, only the eyes may be donated for transplantation. Donation of other tissue or organs makes the body unsuitable for teaching purposes. Information and forms about donation of eyes for transplantation are available from the Eye Bank at The Hospital of Central Connecticut at FREE. Final Disposition When study of the body is completed, the remains are cremated at the Health Center s expense and the ashes returned to the family, according to the donor s instructions. The Anatomical Donation Program maintains a complete list of those who donated their body to the Health Center for teaching purposes. Memorial Services At the end of each academic year, in honor of the donors, the Health Center holds a memorial service that is attended by students, faculty and donors family members.

8 Yale Medical School How will my body be used? Yale Medical School accepts the body as an unrestricted gift for the purpose of medical education and research. It is not possible to specify research in a specific area. We will attempt to maximize the impact of your gift by making it available to as many students and clinicians as possible. How will my body be transported to Yale? Bodies donated according to the guidelines are transported from the place of death to Yale Medical School at no cost to the estate of the deceased (provided a valid death certificate is available). By registering with us you will receive a wallet identification and authorization card for your signature. You are encouraged to discuss your intentions with your loved ones and caregivers, so that they may act on your behalf. Immediately upon the death of the potential donor please contact our office by calling: What if I die outside of Connecticut? Unfortunately, we cannot transport your body from out-of-state due to legal restrictions involving transporting a body from one state to another. If you reside part of the year in another state, you might consider registering with a Medical School in that state as well. May a post mortem exam (autopsy) be performed before my body is donated? We regret we cannot accept your body if a post mortem exam is performed. Do certain diseases prevent my donation? State laws prevent us from accepting bodies of people who have died of certain contagious disease. Our mortician makes final determination at the time when the donor has passed away. We regret that we must present this detail. We do this because we know that it can be a disappointment to everyone concerned and trust that, if it does happen, the family members and friends of the deceased will understand. What are the criteria for body donation? The criteria for body donation are as follows:

9 tees are not acceptable. us can determine acceptability). surgically removed not acceptable. Unreasonable lapse of time between death and discovery of body is not acceptable. not acceptable. xclusive to jaundice, sepsis, mersa are cause of death included in order for us to transport the donor (this is in addition to a nurse pronouncement). What will happen to my body following its use? You have two choices. We encourage you to discuss your choice with your loved ones: your remains at no cost to your estate. The final disposition of the remains is usually done by joint cremation following the completion of our study. The ashes are buried at our site in Evergreen Cemetery, New Haven, CT. mated remains returned to your family. For more information, please call September 16, 2013