Chinese Wedding Customs, Wedding Day

Transcription

1 Chinese Wedding Customs, Wedding Day The Wedding Day ( 大喜日 ) In the wee hours of the morning, as early as 4am, the bride will eat the sibling feast with her siblings and parents. This is a farewell meal, the last meal taken at her parent s home before she is married off. In Chinese belief, the bride belongs to the husband s family after the marriage. The bride will eat an early breakfast of rice, fish, meat and vegetables with her whole family. A sweet dessert cooked with lotus seed ( 莲子 ), red dates ( 红枣 ), dried longans ( 龙眼干 ), dried magnolia petals ( 百合 ), wishing the bride a sweet married life will also be served. For the Teochews, this meal symbolizes the even distribution of family s prosperity. This is the official farewell meal, so only good things and well wishers are mentioned at the table. The bride s parents may advise her on her new role as wife and daughter-in-law. In some family, the bride may serve her parents farewell tea. Tear ducts tend to be overly active on wedding day. Crying at this emotionally charged meal may help to get some of the emotional stress out of the way. Wedding decors Wedding decors - 1 -

2 Hair Dressing Ritual ( 上头 ) After the bridal make up, the bride s parents will attach the wedding veil to her hair. In the absence of the parents, a married elder in the family or a good fortune woman may also do the veiling. The wedding veil is used to cover her face before the groom arrives. Fetch the Bride ( 娶新娘 ) In the morning of the wedding day, the groom together with a group of relatives and friends will go fetch the bride. They will carry a red tray containing: A red packet with the bride s price Pig trotters, which is the mother s reward for bringing up the bride At least 4 or more, even number of tangerines or oranges for good fortune Some dried persimmons for prosperity Some dried longan in shells for sweetness in the marriage Some dried lotus seeds for having many children Some dried magnolia petals called pak hup ( 百合 ) to wish for hundred years of closeness and happiness in the marriage The red tray will be returned with tangerines or oranges replaced in even numbers to signify that the newly joined families will share their good fortune. Bride s Younger Brother to Open the Bridal Car Door ( 小舅开车门 ) The groom must not open the car door when he arrives to fetch his bride. He has to wait patiently for the bride s younger brother to open the bridal car door for him. The bride s younger brother will pass him 2 oranges before opening the door. The 2 oranges will be left in the bridal car for good fortune. The groom will give this younger brother a red packet after he opens the car door. If the bride has no younger brother, a young male relative or a young male friend can play the role

3 Bridesmaids Challenges When the groom arrived at the bride s house, the bride s group of bridesmaids, also called the sisters troop or Ah Yees ( 阿姨 ) will test the groom s sincerity and love for the bride with a series of challenges and mock bargaining session. He has to complete all the challenges to their satisfaction and he will try to buy his way into the house by presenting Lai Shi token money in red packets before they release the bride to him. The entire bargain process is joyous and good natured. The Wedding Ceremony ( 过门 / 拜堂成亲 ) Chinese ceremonies are historically simple compared to other Chinese wedding elements. In fact, the wedding ceremony was seen more as a way to announce the wedding, which was then followed by the banquet. During the ceremony, the bride and groom would stand at the family alter, where the couple would pay homage to heaven and earth and the family ancestors. Tea, usually with lotus seeds and red dates would be offered to the groom s parents. Finally the bride and groom would bow to each other, completing the ceremony. Nuptial Chamber ( 入洞房 ) Immediately following the ceremony, the couple would be led to the bridal chamber, where both would sit on the bed. In some areas of China, honey and wine were poured into 2 goblets linked by a red thread. The bride and groom would take a few sips, then exchange cups and drink the rest

4 Tea Ceremony ( 敬茶 ) The tea ceremony is the most significant event in a Chinese wedding. This time-honoured exchange was created to show respect for the family and the bride is formally introduced to the grooms family. Historically, after they exchange vows, the couple would serve tea to the groom s family. Tea ceremony for the relatives of the bride is usually held in the afternoon when the couple complete the bride s home visit. Today, many couples choose to honor both the bride and groom s families by hosting the ceremonies for both sets of parents. The couple will serve tea to the groom s parents and elders in order of seniority. The order of service is usually: Parents Grand parents Grand uncles and aunts Uncles and aunts Elder brothers and sisters Elder cousins However, there are families who prefer to serve the grandparents before the parents. Within each generation, dad s relatives are served before mum s relatives. When tea is offered, the couple will receive red packets filled with money or jewellery. This is considered the formal introduction. Read more about The Chinese Wedding Tea Ceremony - 4 -

5 Bride s Home Visit ( 三朝回门 ) Traditionally the bride s home visit is 3 days after the Chinese wedding ceremony. For efficiency, modern Chinese wedding usually compressed all the necessary events into a single day. After the tea ceremony at the groom s family home, the bride will change out of her clothing to symbolise passing of 3 days! The bride may choose to change into another western dress, a cheongsam or a traditional red Chinese wedding dress call the Qun Kwa ( 裙褂 ). The Qun Kwa is made of silk, heavily embroidered with motifs of dragons, phoenix and flowers in gold and silver threads. Although heavy due to the embroidery, it is cool and comfortable to wear