How Personality Dimensions Effect Negotiating Style and Tone
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1 How Personality Dimensions Effect Negotiating Style and Tone Crafting a Professional Persona in the Workplace Presented by Mary Ryba Knepper, PhD, Ryba Associates, Inc.
2 Why This Topic? 1. Interest in the connection between personality type and negotiating style 2. Effects on interpersonal communication, which directly affects careers
3 Underlying Concepts Business builds on relationships. It is all about teams today on- and offshore. Communication creates and confirms relationships. Personality defaults to a negotiating style, which influences structure and word choice, creating tone. By crafting discourse with this causality in mind, we can increase efficiency and effectiveness by building strong relationships Copyright 2013 Ryba Associates, Inc. 3
4 What You Will Take with You 1. A better sense of your personality style and default negotiating style 2. A structure to use when crafting an oral or written message, with emphasis today on written because written communication never goes away and can go viral. 3. Tips for controlling tone through word choice. Copyright 2013 Ryba Associates, Inc. 4
5 Overview 1. Identify your personality type. 2. Identify your default negotiating style. 3. Analyze for tone and the underlying negotiating style. 4. Follow a structure that traps the communicator into an optimal negotiating style to control tone. 5. Choose words with tone in mind. Copyright 2013 Ryba Associates, Inc. 5
6 Biology, Personality, and Behavior Genes influence personality dimensions, which influence behavior. E.g., openness, agreeableness & extraversion predict humor style (Greengross, Martin, & Miller, 2012). Negotiation is a communication behavior used to achieve a result. 6
7 DISC Personality Traits Owned by Inscape Publishing Nonjudgmental survey for understanding behavioral types and personality styles: Dominance: Direct, decisive, independent; bottom line and results oriented; strong willed; enjoys challenges and immediate results Influence: Optimistic, social; outgoing; enjoys working with teams, sharing openly, and entertaining and motivating others Steadiness: Cooperative and supportive of others; prefers being in the background, working in a stable environment; good listener; prefers to avoiding conflict and change Conscientiousness: Cautious; concerned; focuses on accuracy, quality, and details; plans ahead; prefers working above a net ; achieves better when validated 7
8 The Flip Side Dominance: Bossy; rigid views; insensitive; runs roughshod over others; loves to debate; wants to win; competitive Influence: Too agreeable; seeks relationship over result; puts fun ahead of work; needs an audience; unrealistic about objectives; divulges sensitive information Steadiness: Is uncomfortable volunteering or making a unilateral decision; ineffective in a high stress or quick change environment; uncomfortable defending a point of view; fears change Conscientiousness: Uneasy taking chances; obsesses over details; seeks perfection despite cost; indulges in paralysis by analysis ; must have validation to be satisfied Copyright 2013 Ryba Associates, Inc. 8
9 Survey Have you identified your DISC dimensions? Were you able to order them? E.g, mine are IDCS, with I slightly higher than D and the C and S about even with the C higher than the S. Copyright 2013 Ryba Associates, Inc. 9
10 Predictability of Personality Traits 1. How stable are these traits? Quite stable in adulthood, but changing with development 2. How heritable are they? Fifty percent or so for each trait 3. How about other cultures? Common across cultures. 10
11 Effects of Attribution: The Power of Naming How we explain someone s behavior affects how we react to it. 11
12 Information Age Reliance on technology Dominance of e mail Less face to face communication This bites! This person is snarky and I do not want to work with him/her. 12
13 Information Revolution Reliance on technology Dominance of e mail Less face to face communication This is. I will align my soul with the author and achieve our greater objective. 13
14 Relationship Result Orientation Using Relationship DISC Influence Conscientiousness Dominance Steadiness Result 14
15 Professionalism in the workplace = Corporate Statesmanship
16 Workplaces = Conflict Incubators Pacing Culture Inattention Miscommunication Impersonal interaction Substantive disagreement Personality types Tacit or explicit negotiating style Copyright 2013 Ryba Associates, Inc. 16
17 Recall the Past Inflammatory ? Inappropriate tone? Energy lost in cleanup, apologies sent or received? Copyright 2013 Ryba Associates, Inc. 17
18 Benefits of Controlling Negotiating Style Time vandals Copyright 2013 Ryba Associates, Inc. 18
19 The Problem of Cool Media and Anonymity No body language Hurried composition Some jerk on the line Road rage with a friend s grandma Biggest pitfall: Incomplete prewriting, which includes wearing our game face choosing the appropriate negotiating style, regardless of personality or mood Copyright 2013 Ryba Associates, Inc. 19
20 Styles of Negotiation Relationship Accommodation Collaboration Influence Conscientiousness Compromise Withdrawal Adversarial Dominance Steadiness Result 20
21 Survey Do you have your style of negotiation identified Does it correspond to your DISC profile? Copyright 2013 Ryba Associates, Inc. 21
22 What Do These Styles Look Like? Accommodating? Adversarial? Withdrawal? Compromise? Collaboration? Copyright 2013 Ryba Associates, Inc. 22
23 A Model for Collaborative Negotiation Common Goal B My turf, issues, interests, fears, concerns, likes Your turf, issues, interests, fears, concerns, likes A How conflicts are born and how they build: Discussion stays at level A. How conflicts are resolved: Discussion posits B and means to reach it. Copyright 2013 Ryba Associates, Inc. 23
24 Model of Corporate Statesmanship Goal Communicator Audience 1/11/2013 Copyright 2013 Ryba Associates, Inc. 24
25 Negotiating Style? [ from an employee to superiors who are not her bosses but who review her work] I would like to talk with both of you about how to be more efficient during our busy season. We need to understand each other s roles during our busy season because both of you review my work and sometimes you are not clear on what needs to happen and when. I will not use my Instant Office during our busiest days. It is disruptive and not helpful to me. I will check only once in the morning and once in the afternoon, and during our busiest time. I do not plan to answer questions or address issues instantly. I would rather that you compile your issues in a list and present them to me at one time rather than sporadically throughout the day. Of course, if something is urgent and you make that clear, I will accommodate your request (etc.) Copyright 2013 Ryba Associates, Inc. 25
26 Negotiating Style? With the busy season behind us, I would like to thank you once again for your considerable help with reviews. In addition, I have been reflecting on ways to increase efficiency and reduce stress for next season. I would like to propose the following as best practices and would appreciate your feedback: To ensure blocks of concentrated work time: 1. Close Instant Office during primetime 2. Check at mutually agreed upon times 3. Respond to a list of questions in one To ensure easy availability of files 1. Use the standard template to address questions 2. Save the template in the temporary files folder for that particular client 3. Create a PDF of the report (Etc). I would like to review this outline with you to see if it could function as a starting point in refining our process. Would you be available? Copyright 2013 Ryba Associates, Inc. 26
27 Negotiating Style? Subject: Selecting a new coffee service Regarding your two proposals for a change of coffee service, both venders seem reasonable and offer good value. Look at your two options together, and decide on a single service, which you both could support. I will prepare a contract for the vendor you select. Copyright 2013 Ryba Associates, Inc. 27
28 Negotiating Style? Subject: Timeline for migration Regarding your request to move the migration deadline up two weeks, we can accommodate. However, we cannot guarantee the following If these caveats are not showstoppers, we will proceed with the new timeline. Copyright 2013 Ryba Associates, Inc. 28
29 Negotiating Style? Subject: FW: All employee e mail message for approval Isn t this an example of the kind of we agreed would not be sent to all employees but just to the Service Desk, thereby bypassing the cascade effect of pro forma approvals? 1/11/2013 Copyright 2013 Ryba Associates, Inc. 29
30 Crafting Collaboration: Structure 1. Begin with courtesies. 2. Envision and evoke a common goal. 3. State or allude to working in tandem to achieve the goal. 4. Supply tactical details; describe how to reach the goal together; use deferential terms. 5. Conclude with an action plan or action courtesies, such as, I look forward to working with you. Copyright 2013 Ryba Associates, Inc. 30
31 Crafting Collaboration: Word Choice Eliminate negatives. State forward looking actions. Use active voice and shorter sentences for the sense of momentum. Use we unless the audience objects, as some clients might if an internal department feels rivalry toward you and your service. Copyright 2013 Ryba Associates, Inc. 31
32 Summary Business is about transactions with people, which proceed based on negotiation. Communication discloses the writer/presenter s relationship with the audience, which manifests a negotiation style. Regardless of personality or circumstance, communicators can craft statesmanlike discourse by positing the collaborative model: Common goal Means of working together toward it Clear, courteous action Courteous wording Copyright 2013 Ryba Associates, Inc. 32
33 Q&A Questions? Requests? Revisions? Your writing? Copyright 2013 Ryba Associates, Inc. 33
34 Model: Using SUM to Write Report Purpose Situation and Task Purpose Upshot Map Action Map Subject: Why you are getting this writing 1st statement: What happened (S); what I did about it and why (TP) 2nd statement: What I found out and/or what you need to know 3rd statement: What points or specifics are to be covered (RP) Last statement: What is the next step
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