PLAY THERAPY WITH PRE-TEENS AND TEENS OBJECTIVES COMMON QUESTIONS. Lisa Dion, LPC, RPT-S

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1 PLAY THERAPY WITH PRE-TEENS AND TEENS Lisa Dion, LPC, RPT-S OBJECTIVES Understand when it might be helpful to apply nondirective and directive play therapy interventions with pre-teens and teens Understand the importance of assessing the pre-teen or teen s emotional age in the play therapy process Understand the most important goal when applying play therapy to your work with pre-teens and teens COMMON QUESTIONS Do I talk? What do I do when they don t talk? What do I do when they don t want to be there? In general, what do I do? Should I be directive or non-directive? What do I do when they talk a lot? What do I do when they want to talk about things that don t seem related to the therapy

2 IT ALL JUST FEELS 4 PHASES TO THIS WORKSHOP Understand what is happening in their brains and why Emotional and Developmental Age The primary question that teenagers are trying to answer for themselves Our role and how do we help maximize what is attempting to happen in their brains and in therapy MYTH #1 The Dopamine System- Dopamine is both a neurotransmitter and helps release other hormones. It helps control the brain s reward and pleasure centers. Helps regulate movement and emotional responses, and it enables us not only to see rewards, but also take action to move towards them. Neural circuits utilizing dopamine increase, which makes teens gravitate towards thrilling experiences and exhilarating sensations. Brainstorm by Dan Siegel

3 Increases in dopamine lead to: Impulsiveness- Important to develop higher centers of the brain to help counteract the dopamine system. Hyperrationality- Observing the facts without the big picture. Teens are aware of risks, but emphasis the benefits. We move from hyperrationality to gist thinking in the teenage years. Gist thinking requires the use of intuition and trusting your heart feelings. Teens are times more likely to suffer injury or death during this phase of development. (Reflect on your own teenage years) Since this happens in all teenager s brain and is a part of development, how do we support exploration and minimize chance of harm? REDIRECT INSTEAD OF TRYING TO MAKE IT STOP unless there is a safety issue

4 THIS IS SCARY!! Why would the brain change like this? The need for change: ES- Brainstorm by Daniel Siegel N- SE- CE- 4 FEARS OF THE BRAIN Adol-ESSENCE The dopamine provides! The brain s desire for ESSENCE helps override the fear response that keep them from growing and becoming themselves. Adolescence is the formation of

5 MYTH #2 The teenager is moving towards interdependence and breaking away from dependence The pre-teen and teen has to push away to discover his or her authentic self, but shutting others out totally is not natural development When teens perceives too big of a challenge to be their authentic selves in a particular relationship, they will pull away. INTERCONNECTED NOT INDEPENDENT MWE by Dan Siegel You MWE Me

6 UNDERSTANDING EMOTIONAL AGE Duey Freeman, LPC 12 + Who am I? 7-11 yrs. How well can I do it? 4-6 yrs. How much can I do? mos. Am I ok? 0-18 mos. Is the world ok? In Utero-Few mos. Do I/Can I exist? WHO AM I? Discovering my Authentic Self Pruning and Myelination- The brain begins a pruning and myelination process in order to become more specialized, integrated, and interconnected. THE JOURNEY TO THE AUTHENTIC SELF The Values Factor by John Demartini Important to help pre-teen and teens discover their HIGHEST VALUES to awaken their If a teen doesn t learn how to attach to themselves, they will be at a high risk for losing themselves and listening to the shoulds Therapy is about the journey

7 QUESTIONS TO CONSIDER Are the parents expecting the child s Genius and Values to be the same as theirs? Are we expecting a child s Genius and Values to be in alignment with our value system? Is our non-directive or directive intervention rescuing them from having to attach to themselves and orient inward instead of towards us? THERE IS NO SCRIPT! Any intervention that helps the teen attach to themselves and discover their authentic self is helpful Interventions must be at the emotional age of the child Being yourself is the hardest and most important lesson of your life - Lisa Dion

8 ESSENTIAL SYNERGETIC PLAY THERAPY PRINCIPALS Understand that the child is setting you up to feel how he or she is feeling Be Authentic! Model Regulation THE SET UP BE AUTHENTIC! The more authentic you are, you give your client permission to also be authentic This helps the client: Increase neural connection in the brain through self reflection Develop the frontal cortex which is necessary for empathy, mind-sight, and self regulation. Attach to self! The foundation of all healing

9 MODEL REGULATION Might be non-directive or directive (inviting teen to regulate) Regulation will probably be more contained- balls, rocking, tapping feet, etc. Make fun of yourself; let the child hear you talking out loud about your inner critic The inner critic is attempting to.. FACILITATING THE THERAPY Have to assess the emotional age. Don t be fooled by size. When to talk and when to play? When to be directive and when to be non-directive? Creative Interventions- Sand, Games, Art, Music, Movement

10 WHEN TO PLAY AND WHEN TO TALK Stories are the pre-teen and teenager s play- the mind can t tell the difference between real and imagined Do you know why you are talking? Are you talking to avoid feeling? Whatever they talk about repeatedly (just like whatever kid s play repeatedly) is what is most important to them- highest value. ` Lisa Dion LPC, RPT-S Play Therapy Institute of Colorado Boulder, Colorado