Emotional Intelligence

Transcription

1 Emotional Intelligence Taming the Caveman in You v

2 ACTIVITY Emotional Responses p. 3 in PG Think of a recent incident when SOMEONE ELSE you encountered got angry or upset over something you (or your direct reports) did, said, or failed to do. What did they look like? Jot down as many descriptors as you can about what you saw/heard; e.g., yelling, cursing, etc. Page 3; 1 minute Pair, share, and compare lists. Check the ones you have in common with your partner. 3 minutes. v Emotional Intelligence- Taming the Caveman in You 2

3 Which of these animals best fits those descriptions? v Emotional Intelligence- Taming the Caveman in You 3

4 How many fit your descriptions? v Emotional Intelligence- Taming the Caveman in You 4

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6 Taming the Caveman in You Emotional threats vs. physical threats. Same response mechanisms. Learn why this is so and implications. Explore what to do to tame this caveman in you. v Emotional Intelligence- Taming the Caveman in You 7

7 Presentation Agenda Define What Emotional Intelligence Is and Is Not Explore How Emotions Impact Our Lives Anatomical Origins of Emotions Identify Two Dimensions and Four Domains of EI Explore How to Develop Your EI. v Emotional Intelligence- Taming the Caveman in You 9

8 PERSONAL REFLECTION Think of Bosses You ve Had p. 5 What are characteristics of the BEST boss you ever had? What are characteristics of the WORST boss you ever had? Two minutes. v Emotional Intelligence- Taming the Caveman in You 10

9 Emotional Intelligence Defined Daniel Goleman [Emotional Intelligence] is the capacity for recognizing our own feelings and those of others, for motivating ourselves, and for managing emotions well in ourselves and in our relationships. --Daniel Goleman, 1998 v Emotional Intelligence- Taming the Caveman in You 11

10 Brief History of EI Peter Salovey Term: Emotional Intelligence first used by Peter Salovey and John D. Mayer (1990). Research in emotions and human behavior dates back to 1930 s and 40 s. EI is grounded in: psychology, sociology, human anatomy, human development, and human relations. John D. Mayer v Emotional Intelligence- Taming the Caveman in You 12

11 hat EI is and is not It is NOT about being nice all the time. It IS about being honest. It is NOT about being touchy-feely. It IS about being aware of your feelings and the feelings of others. It is NOT about being emotional. It IS about being smart with your emotions. v Emotional Intelligence- Taming the Caveman in You 13

12 Mirror Neurons From the emerging field of social neuroscience. Mirror neurons operate like neural WiFi. They replicate in us the sensed state of the other person. v Emotional Intelligence- Taming the Caveman in You 14

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16 MORROR NEURONS The Bride s Special Dance Mirror neurons are a neural mechanism that explains emotional contagion, especially in the display of strong emotions. Do you know those people in the video? v Emotional Intelligence- Taming the Caveman in You 18

17 Valid Feelings? Are the emotions you felt valid? All feelings and emotions are valid. The behaviors resulting from those emotions may not always be appropriate. v Emotional Intelligence- Taming the Caveman in You 19

18 The Human Gap Four Human that separates Endowments* us from animals. Stimulus Response Self-Awareness: The ability to stand apart from one s actions and behaviors, and analyze them. Imagination: The ability to anticipate the future. Conscience: A sense of right and wrong. (Note: This is influenced by culture.) Independent Will: The ability to choose one s response in any given situation. *SOURCE: Covey, Stephen R., The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People. v Emotional Intelligence- Taming the Caveman in You 20

19 Source: Executive Center EI Integrates the PFC and the Amygdala. Limits Options v Emotional Intelligence- Taming the Caveman in You 21

20 Characteristics of Amygdala Hijacking Amygdala Hijacking: Any situation in which a person responds inappropriately based on emotional rather than intellectual factors. (Daniel Goleman) Strong emotional response Sudden or intense reaction You do, say, or send about something you later regret. We get REALLY DUMB!!! v Emotional Intelligence- Taming the Caveman in You 22

21 p. 13 TOPPING THE HIJACK EVENT THINK FEEL ACT KEY POINT The degree to which you can avoid being hijacked by your emotions in any given situation is what we measure as Emotional Intelligence. v Emotional Intelligence- Taming the Caveman in You 23

22 Key Points When we need to be at our very best, we are at our very worst! (Patterson, Grenny, et al.; Crucial Conversations, 2001) Out-of-control emotions make smart people stupid. (Daniel Goleman, 1998) Stupid is as stupid does. (Forrest Gump, 1994) v Emotional Intelligence- Taming the Caveman in You 24

23 imensions of Emotional Intelligence Personal Competence pertains to yourself, both recognizing and regulating your own emotions. Social Competence relates to others, including recognizing the needs and emotions of others, and then regulating one s own behavior in managing relationships. --Daniel Goleman v Emotional Intelligence- Taming the Caveman in You 25

24 ompetencies in Goleman s Model v Emotional Intelligence- Taming the Caveman in You 26

25 Paradox Emotional Intelligence is important. A class in Emotional Intelligence won t develop it. But you CAN Understand emotions and their impact on behavior; Learn EI concepts and practice effective behaviors; Continually explore how you impact others. v Emotional Intelligence- Taming the Caveman in You 36

26 eveloping Emotional Intelligence Research EI. Research human emotional needs. Assess (self and 360 ). Identify competency strengths and areas to improve. Revisit/create your Career Development Plan. Work with a coach or mentor. Practice, evaluate, practice, evaluate, practice v Emotional Intelligence- Taming the Caveman in You 37

27 What We Covered Today Defined What Emotional Intelligence Is and Is Not Explored How Emotions Impact Our Lives Identified the Anatomical Origins of Emotions Identified Two Dimensions and Four Domains of EI Explored How to Develop Your EI. v Emotional Intelligence- Taming the Caveman in You 38

28 Have a Great Day! v Emotional Intelligence- Taming the Caveman in You 39