Active Listening and Unconditional Positive Regard: How Working in Prison Prepared Me for Life as a Transition Specialist

Transcription

1 East Williamson County Cooperative Active Listening and Unconditional Positive Regard: How Working in Prison Prepared Me for Life as a Transition Specialist Valerie Conner, LBSW, M.Ed., L.P.C.

2 Culture Shock Defined A sense of confusion and uncertainty, sometimes with feelings of anxiety that may affect people exposed to an alien culture or environment without adequate preparation.

3 Transition Is Listening Asking Questions Offering Information Walking with our students and their families through the planned change process

4 Sharing Secrets Understand and acknowledge that for students who are being evaluated for, or receiving special education services, we are asking for disclosure of private, personal and potentially shame/guilt inducing information.

5 Active Listening Building Rapport Facilitating understanding Building trust Allows the speaker and listener to clarify/correct

6 Barriers to Listening Our own values Our egos Our agendas Our schedules

7 Barriers to Listening Our belief that we (the experts) know what is best for students, families and communities Lack of cultural awareness (using me as the yardstick) Fear of asking questions

8 Summarization Restate main points to check for understanding Example: So you believe Julie s biggest needs for the coming year are improving organizational skills, participating in an extra-curricular activity and taking a vocational class?

9 Reflection of Meaning Reflect the meaning behind the words Example: It sounds like you are saying you would like to be notified sooner when Brian forgets to turn in homework, so you can ensure it doesn t negatively affect his grade.

10 Reflection of Feeling Reflect the feelings that underlie the words Example: So you don t want to take the fashion design class because you are fearful the other students will make fun of you Tom?

11 Unconditional Positive Regard Carl Rogers Person-Centered Therapy All people have the need for selfdetermination and the more this is encouraged and nurtured, the more the individual will positively work toward self-improvement.

12 Unconditional Positive Regard The helper operates under the assumption that the individual is trustworthy, and given the right conditions, will be internally motivated toward positive change. The individual IS NOT externally directed by an expert who knows what is best for the individual.

13 Behavior Based on the individual s perception of situations. As no one else can know how we perceive, we are the best experts on ourselves (Rogers, 1951).

14 Unconditional Positive Regard Three core helper attributes required to support growth in the person being helped: Congruence Unconditional Positive Regard Accurate Empathic Understanding *These are not a list of interventions, they are a way of relating to others

15 Conditional Positive Regard My relationship with you being OK is dependent upon you doing what I think you should do. Shame and guilt are used as a means by which to obtain compliance.

16 Unconditional Positive Regard My relationship with you being OK is not determined by your actions. I realize, embrace and celebrate the fact that you are an individual, with your own value system, who has the right to self-determination. You may or may not choose to do what I think you should do-and I m OK with that.

17 Person-centered Providers Relinquish control View the student/family as the experts of their needs and plans Set aside our ego Celebrate cultural diversity and individual differences Are gracious and grateful

18 References Corey, G. (2001). Theory and Practice of Counseling and Psychotherapy (6th ed.). Belmont, CA: Brooks/Cole. Culture Shock. (n). In Merriam-Webster s online dictionary (11th ed.). Retrieved from Grohol, J. (2007). Become a Better Listener: Active Listening. Psych Central. Retrieved on June 18, 2013, from Rogers, C. (1951). Client-centered Therapy: Its current practice, Implications and Theory. London: Constable. Workers, N. A. (2008). NASW Code of Ethics (Guide to the Everyday Professional Conduct of Social Workers). Washington, DC: NASW.