New Dean Mentoring Program: Mentor Mentee Handbook AACN's New Dean Mentoring Program matches an experienced AACN-member academic nursing dean with a member who is new to the dean's role for a yearlong period of mutual development. New deans determine the areas of concern to them and establish the method and frequency of communication with their mentors. Mentors counsel and advise their new dean colleagues on the role of the dean and familiarize them with AACN member services and activities, in addition to accomplishing the mutually-established goals.
Welcome to the New Dean Mentoring Program! This handbook has been compiled to help you get the most out of your mentor/mentee relationship. You will find a number of guidelines, worksheets, and reference materials that will guide you from the beginning to the end of the mentoring process. You can click on any hyperlink to navigate to that section. At the end of your mentoring relationship, you will be sent a short survey to evaluate this handbook. For the first question, see the date at the bottom of this page. This handbook was updated September 3, 2015.
Table of Contents What is Mentoring? Preparing for the Mentoring Relationship To-Do List: Establishing the Relationship Mentor Worksheet Mentee Worksheet Ensuring Accountability and Confidentiality Setting Your Goals Goal Setting Framework Worksheet Evaluating Your Goals Maintaining the Mentoring Relationship The Mentor s Role: Support, Vision, and Challenge The Mentee s Role Providing and Accepting Effective Feedback Resolving and Managing Conflict Closing the Mentoring Relationship Ending the Relationship Worksheet 1
What is Mentoring? Mentoring is a reciprocal learning relationship in which mentor and mentee agree to a partnership where they will work collaboratively toward achievement of mutually defined goals that will develop a mentee s skills, abilities, knowledge, and thinking. As a mentor, you may also experience the following impacts: Satisfaction that comes with supporting others Expansion of your perspective in the role of Dean and in Higher Education Opportunities to learn from others Expanded professional relationships Opportunities to work jointly on projects or goals A mentoring program is a work in progress and must have continuous feedback. We highly encourage you to share feedback with your mentor or mentee throughout the process so that you can fine-tune your relationship to better suit your needs. This chart is a basic summary of the mentoring process. 1 2
Preparing for the Mentoring Relationship Mentors and mentees must prepare before their first meeting in order to have a framework for building a strong relationship and setting goals efficiently and effectively. The following to-do list will provide a framework for your first interaction with your mentor/mentee. Additionally, please review and complete the appropriate worksheet and be prepared to share this information with your mentor/mentee. 3
To-Do List: Establishing the Relationship 2 As you both think about how to proceed to create the mutually-beneficial relationship: 1. Take time to get to know each other. Obtain a copy of your mentor/mentee s bio or CV Helpful questions: What points of connection have you discovered? What else do you want to learn about your mentor/mentee? 2. Share mentoring stories. Share previous mentoring experience with your mentor/mentee Helpful questions: What worked in your previous mentoring relationships? What didn t work? 3. Talk about the mentee s learning and development goals. Describe your career vision Articulate broad learning goals Helpful questions: Why do you want to engage in this relationship? What learning goals would align with your vision of the future? 4. Determine relationship needs and expectations. Ask your mentor/mentee what they want, need, and expect Helpful questions: Are you clear about your own wants, needs, and expectations? 5. Discuss learning and communication styles. Determine and share your own learning and communication style Discuss your preferred method of communication Helpful questions: How might your style of learning and communication style affect the mentoring relationship? What obstacles might limit your communication methods (ex. time zone differences)? 4
Mentor Worksheet 2 Think about your mentoring experiences and the people who were there to guide you, support you, and strengthen you. You are encouraged to share this with your mentee. 1. What do you hope to gain from this mentoring experience? 2. Who were your mentors? 3. What wisdom have you gained from each of your mentors? 4. What is it you learned that might contribute to your own development as a mentor? 5. What did you learn about being a mentee? 6. What do you need to know about your mentee in order to have a better sense of where they are in their life? 5
Mentee Worksheet 3 Think about your life so far what milestones have you achieved? What challenges, disappointments, transformative events, and changes have you encountered along the way? You are encouraged to share this with your mentor. 1. Identify your top three professional successes. Describe the role you played and why you succeeded. Which are you the most proud of and why? 2. What were the major personal and professional challenges you faced? Why were they particularly challenging and what did you do to overcome them? 3. What challenges do you face now? 4. What are your strengths? 5. Are you using your strengths? Are there gaps you need to fill in? Are there challenges that must be faced? 6. What barriers are you creating for yourself? Do you notice any patterns? 7. What is your vision for yourself? Your unit? 8. What assumptions might you have about your role, your impact, your value, or your self-confidence? Is there a difference in how you perceive your impact versus how others do? 9. What steps do you need to take to achieve your personal vision? Have you taken any of these steps? 6
Ensuring Accountability and Confidentiality 4 It is vital that you establish the methods and frequency of communication as soon as possible. Here are some points of discussion as you determine your ideal communication style: Decide frequency of contact and methods (e.g., twice a month in person, phone calls once a week, text, email, Skype, etc.) Discuss communication styles do you think out loud? Do you need time to think before responding? Do you prefer face-to-face interaction, phone conversations, email, or some combination of these methods? Discuss learning styles knowing how your mentor or mentee processes information will allow you to communicate more effectively Discuss how each person prefers to receive feedback Discuss process for notifying each other if these agreed-upon points need to be altered or changed While establishing your methods of communication, it is wise to touch on the subject of confidentiality having clear boundaries will strengthen your trust. Ask yourself and each other these questions: Is it okay to share information in order to enlist others support and/or to ensure the best mentoring experience? Is it okay to share information with others in order to resolve mentoring relationship issues? Determining these guidelines early will allow for a more productive mentoring relationship. 7
Setting Your Goals The mentoring relationship works best when the mentor and mentee set goals that they can achieve together during the mentoring relationship. The goals set will predominantly be those of the mentee, but the mentor may have some goals that he or she wants to set as well. Clearly defined goals are essential for a successful mentoring process. They can focus your time and energy, clarify your priorities, and perhaps most importantly provide a way to make daunting achievements realizable. This section will show you how to set clear, achievable goals. You will find a Goal Setting Framework worksheet and information on how to evaluate your goals. 8
Goal Setting Framework Worksheet 2 This worksheet is a tool you can use to clarify and refine your goals. Feel free to share the completed worksheet with your mentor/mentee. GOAL What do you want to achieve? ACTION STEPS: What steps will you take to achieve this goal? MEASUREMENT / OBJECTIVE EVIDENCE: How will you know when the goal is achieved? What will you be doing differently? TIMELINE: When will you accomplish this? Is this a short-, medium-, or longterm goal? 9
Evaluating Your Goals 2 Once you have determined your goals for the mentoring process, it s a good idea to evaluate them. Look over your goals with your mentor/mentee and check them against the following criteria: 1. Is your goal clearly anchored in the future? How do we know that? 2. Will the goal be challenging? Is it a stretch goal rather than a maintenance goal? In what ways? 3. Will this goal require you to make a personal investment of time, energy, and effort? Is this something you can manage? 4. Is this goal achievable within the timeframe of our mentoring relationship? What makes you think that it is or is not? 10
Maintaining the Mentoring Relationship Now that you have made contact with your mentor/mentee, discussed the framework of your relationship, and set and evaluated your goals, you are ready to begin the longest phase of the process. How you proceed will be largely determined by your unique needs and goals, but you can refer to these guidelines to make sure your interactions are successful and productive. In this section, you will find information about: The Mentor s Role The Mentee s Role Providing and Accepting Effective Feedback Listening and Communicating Effectively Resolving and Engaging in and Managing Conflict 11
The Mentor s Role: Support, Vision, Challenge 2 As an experienced dean, you are in a unique position to pass on your knowledge about the dean s role as your mentee manages this transition. Remember that the mentoring process should be driven by the goals and needs of your mentee. The mentor s actions enabling growth fall into three general areas: Support, Vision, and Challenge. 1. SUPPORT What specific support can you provide to help your mentee grow and develop? Key Strategies: Listening Providing structure Expressing positive expectations Serving as an advocate Sharing yourself Making it special 2. VISION In what ways can you help our mentee see, develop, and realize their vision? Key Strategies: Modeling Keeping tradition Offering a map Suggesting new language Providing a mirror 3. CHALLENGE What specific strategies can you use to challenge your mentee? Key Strategies: Setting tasks Engaging in discussion Setting up dichotomies Constructing hypotheses Setting high standards 12
The Mentee s Role 4 As the mentee, you are managing a significant career transition into the dean s role. To get the most out of this process, it is imperative that you are proactive and specific about your goals, needs, and challenges. The more effectively you communicate these goals to your mentor, the more you will both benefit and grow. Remember that the mentoring process is most advantageous to both parties when it is mentee-driven. Here are some objectives for you to consider as you begin your mentoring relationship. As always, feel free to discuss this role with your mentor and change these objectives to suit your particular needs. Bring forth professional and career issues for discussion Make your own decisions Be prepared to take risks Look for new challenges Set professional goals Take appropriate advantage of professional development opportunities suggested by the mentor Share openly with the mentor Accept constructive criticism Implement the feedback given to you by your mentor wisely Disclose frustrations and concerns 13
Providing & Accepting Effective Feedback 6,7 Offering frequent constructive feedback is vital to the success of a mentoring relationship. Receiving feedback can feel threatening, but when it is given in a positive, forward-thinking manner, it can be extremely beneficial to both parties. Before offering feedback, consider the following: Be clear Why are you giving the feedback? For example, I want to improve our working relationship. Here is some information about what s getting in the way. Be specific Tell them what you perceive and the meaning you give to that perception. Tell them how you feel about what you perceive and how you feel about that feeling. Speak to behavior These are the objective things someone can choose to do something about. For example, I noticed that or I saw you or I heard you say Be direct and avoid preambles (such as I don t want to hurt your feelings ). Be timely Feedback is most useful when it is given as soon after the action/behavior as possible. Also, remember that feedback can be both positive and corrective. There are different guidelines you should consider when providing these different types of feedback. Positive Feedback: Encouraging positive, helpful behavior Provide specific details about what the mentee did well Show how behavior relates to the mentee s goals Let the mentee know that you appreciate the effort and results Praise approximately right behavior Corrective Feedback: Identifying and discouraging harmful or unhelpful behavior Have the mentee identify what they are doing well Provide the mentee with alternate behaviors Make sure that the feedback describes what the person is doing that it s about the activity, not critical of the person and relates to the goal Whenever possible, provide corrective information before errors occur End on a positive note 14
Listening and Communicating Effectively 4 Excellent mentors actively listen, and mentees rank listening high among traits of ideal mentors. If you are the mentor, it can be tempting to rush to offer advice, provide suggestions and answers, or tell your own story without listening to their mentee s real concerns. Here are some guidelines to ensure active listening and communication: Don t interrupt until your mentee has finished his or her presentation of ideas. Let your mentee know that you ve heard by paraphrasing what he or she has said. Provide input when the mentee asks. If you have advice, try prefacing it with May I offer you a suggestion? State advice and feedback in the first person singular. Rather than You ought to or You should, try beginning your suggestions with What works for me or What I ve found helpful By referring to yourself, you won t sound critical or judgmental to the mentee you re merely giving them the benefit of your experience. Let the mentee know which emotions you re sensing for example, You sound frustrated or You sound disappointed. Seek to understand the motivations behind your mentee s decisions. Instead of asking Why?, try Help me understand Some examples of useful questions you can ask your mentee: What have you learned about your project that you didn t expect to learn? How is this project different from the last one you managed? If you could handle the situation again, what would you do differently? 15
Engaging in and Managing Conflict 4,5 Interpersonal conflict can happen even in the strongest mentoring relationships. Should you and your mentor/mentee encounter a conflict, it s important to determine exactly what the conflict is as well as the outcome you desire. Conflicts can often arise from misunderstanding, misinterpretation, miscommunication, or differing opinions keep this in mind as you work to determine what went wrong. Although there are many ways to resolve conflict, keep the following points in mind as you discuss the issue with your mentor/mentee: Focus on the problem or issue, not the person: Refrain from personal attacks* and work to make the conversation about the specific problem(s) you are currently facing. Don t hold grudges or bring up unrelated past issues. Maintain self-confidence and self-esteem of the other person: Make sure that you are open and empathetic throughout these discussions, and prioritize working through the issues and finding a solution rather than proving that you are right and your mentor/mentee is wrong. Maintain a positive and constructive attitude: High emotion and strong feelings are normal reactions to conflict, but when discussing the conflict with your mentor/mentee, look forward and focus on how to resolve the issues. Allow for cooling-off periods if necessary before beginning the conversation. When it s time to begin the conflict resolution conversation, take the following steps: 1. Take time to reflect before resolving a conflict: Write down what you see as the conflict and why you think it occurred. Consider what the other person s perspective might be. 2. Set a supportive climate. Do not be defensive. 3. Be prepared to listen. Use active listening techniques, such as paraphrasing, clarifying, etc. 4. Be prepared to move forward in a healthy, positive way. 5. Use this as an opportunity to discuss how future conflicts will be resolved. * Personal attacks are when differences shift from the issue causing the conflict to the personalities or individuals involved. Personal attacks are usually volatile because they are emotionally driven and based on perceptions about someone s character or motives. Personal attacks are unacceptable and antithetical to the conflict resolution and mentoring processes. 16
Closing the Mentoring Relationship 2 When the time comes to end your mentoring relationship, you have the opportunity to reflect on your successes and challenges and share these reflections with your mentor or mentee. The following worksheet will give you a template to follow as you organize your thoughts. When the mentoring process ends, you will redefine your relationship with your mentor/mentee. You may decide to continue the relationship informally or on an ad hoc basis. 17
Ending the Relationship: Worksheet Prior to meeting for the last time, both mentor and mentee should take time to reflect on the questions below with the goal of sharing the responses with each other. What did I learn from this relationship what is my learning conclusion? 1. Were the learning goals realized? If yes what did you learn as a result? If no what got in the way? What do you need to do to reach them? 2. What else do you need to learn? 3. What worked well for you in the relationship? 4. What did you learn as a result of the process? 5. What did you learn about yourself as a learner? 6. What did you learn about being a mentor or mentee? 7. What would you do differently next time? Have I integrated my learning? 1. How will you apply what you learned? 2. What will you do as a result of what you ve learned? 3. What action steps will you take? How will I celebrate my learning success? 1. What are meaningful ways to celebrate what you ve accomplished? 2. How will you express appreciation as a part of the celebration? 18
Sources 1. Mijares, L., Baxley, S., & Bond, M. (2013). Mentoring: A Concept Analysis. The Journal of Theory Construction and Testing, 17(1), 26-26. 2. Zachary, L. (2000). The mentor's guide: Facilitating effective learning relationships. San Francisco: Jossey-Bass. 3. Zachary, L., & Fischler, L. (2009). The mentee's guide: Making mentoring work for you. San Francisco: Jossey-Bass. 4. Murphy, S. (2009) Maximizing Your Mentoring Relationships: Resource Guide. Princeton, NJ: Robert Wood Johnson Foundation, Physician Faculty Scholars Program, National Advisory Committee. 5. Johnson, W., & Ridley, C. (2004). The elements of mentoring. New York, NY: Palgrave Macmillan. 6. Lencioni, P. (2002). The five dysfunctions of a team: A leadership fable. San Francisco, CA: Jossey-Bass. 7. Lundin, S., & Goldsmith, M. (1999). Feedback is a gift. Burnsville, MN: ChartHouse International Learning. 19
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