ENLIGHTENER NOVEMBER/DECEMBER 2012 / ISSUE 105

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1 LOVE the fruit of the Spirit is PEACE patience, kindness, goodness JOY faithfulness, gentleness, self-control The ENLIGHTENER NOVEMBER/DECEMBER 2012 / ISSUE 105 TEMPERAMENT CORNER Counseling the Supine HOW TO BECOME A MORE EFFECTIVE TEMPERAMENT COUNSELOR I.R. SPOTLIGHT DR. GARY TRYZBIAK OF COLORADO THEOLOGICAL SEMINARY Merry Christmas JESUS LUKE 2:12 And this will be a sign for you: you will find a baby wrapped in swaddling cloths and lying in a manger.

2 The Enlightener 2 S.A.C.C. INTERNATIONAL REPRESENTATIVE SPOTLIGHT I.R. Spotlight Dr. Gary G. Trzybiak is a Certified Pastoral Member of the Sarasota Academy of Christian Counseling and has been an International Representative since August 13, He is also director of Colorado Theological Seminary, an N.C.C.A. Certified Academic Institution. Dr. Gary G. Trzybiak I am very fortunate to be an International Representative for the Sarasota Academy of Christian Counselors (SACC) and the Director of Counseling for Colorado Theological Seminary (CTS), which is a Certified Academic Institution for the National Christian Counselor s Association (NCCA). These roles give me a lot of flexibility in honoring the Lord with quality and proven training products that will enhance a person s life as well as those he or she influences. Of the hundreds of courses I offer at Colorado Theological Seminary, Creation Therapy, provided by the Sarasota Academy of Christian Counselors, is my all-time favorite. Not only is this course standard fare for some of our Christian Counseling programs, but it is the first requirement in our Master of Divinity program. In many instances, once a student has taken Creation Therapy, they decide to change their focus from divinity to counseling. That is how powerful this course is. There are times in the mentoring process when I determine that the student is having problems coming to grips with their personal circumstances. In this case, I offer to exchange a Bible or theology course for Creation Therapy. What better way to help a student, whether they be over burdened by course work, or are having financial or family difficulty, than to help them understand their temperament and associated needs? My entire intent is to help the student complete their degree program. Failure to complete a program will haunt students. God wants winners and what better way to help students overcome the hurdles than to educate them on why they do the things they do? Ultimately this knowledge will be used by graduates to help their counselees, congregations and missions. As a biblically based model for Christian counseling, I find the Creation Therapy course nearly one hundred percent accurate. The Arno Profile System, as a temperament instrument, clearly is evidence of this in my experience. I have come across numerous other Biblical counseling methodologies. Other schools offer these models, but they just never made sense to me. Creation Therapy seems to make sense to my students as well. As an International Representative of SACC, you may not come across individuals that want to earn a degree per se, however, you need to understand that the Creation Therapy course has been tried and proven over the years. You will definitely be able to assist individuals looking for that quality Christian counseling education. This course has personally changed my life. The chances are very good that it has changed yours as well. As you continue to market this product, you will be changing the course of Christian lives for the better. That is a mission worth pursuing! Don t forget to offer Drs. Arno s book The Missing Link to your prospective counselees. It is a great adjunct to the course.

3 The Enlightener 3 WHAT WOULD IT BE LIKE IF EVERYONE WAS A SUPINE? Temperament Corner by Dr. Phyllis J. Arno HOW TO BECOME A MORE EFFECTIVE TEMPERAMENT COUNSELOR To become a more effective temperament counselor, you need to be able to set aside your own temperament so that you can help those who come to you for counsel learn how to meet their needs in godly ways in order to bring and maintain balance in their life. You may never be able to totally perceive and comprehend a temperament other than the one God gave you; however, with temperament training, you can learn to understand and appreciate the differences of the temperaments in the people God created.

4 The Enlightener 4 Thank God He created people with different temperaments! Can you imagine what it would be like if we all had the same temperament? What would it be like if everyone was a Supine? We would all be faithful/supportive/tenderhearted/gentle-spirited/compassionate/ sensitive peoplee. There would be no: Cholerics leaders/people motivators/ strong-minded/guilt free/ confident/controlling people Melancholies artistic/creative/rebels/ perfectionist/self-sacrificing/ faithful/loyal people 1. BE FEARFUL SUPINE They need to be aware of their tendency to: It can be difficult for Supines to encourage their counselees not to be fearful when they themselves are fearful. Supines can have thoughts such as: Help! I am afraid I am in over my head! I can t help you; I can t even help myself! What am I doing counseling others? They need to learn that some of the temperaments are not as fearful as they are, and they need to learn that some of the other temperaments can be as fearful as they are; therefore, they need to learn to encourage their counselees not to be fearful as the Holy Scriptures tell us approximately 365 times to fear not. See Isaiah 41:10. Phlegmatics Sanguines peacemakers/negotiators/ detailed workers calm/ easygoing/well-rounded people fast-paced/upbeat/open/ friendly/inspiring/carefree/ cheerful people As you can readily see, we need all five of the temperaments (including blends and compulsives); however, each temperament has strengths and weaknesses which need to be yielded to God for perfection. Paul states in I Corinthians 12:14-17: For the body is not one member, but many. If the foot shall say, Because I am not the hand, I am not of the body; is it therefore not of the body? And if the ear shall say, Because I am not the eye, I am not of the body, is it therefore, not of the body? If the whole body were an eye, where were the hearing? If the whole were hearing, where were the smelling? Just like the human body, it takes our heart, liver, kidneys, arms, legs, ears, eyes, etc., all working together in order for us to be able to function as the body of Christ. In this issue we will examine some of the tendencies a Supine counselor needs to be aware of regarding his/her own temperament tendencies. 2. NEED ACCEPTANCE It can be difficult for Supines to be objective when counseling others. This is because of their need for acceptance. They tend to want to please their counselees, so it is difficult for them to give the counselee advice/ information that could upset or anger the counselee. Supine counselors can have thoughts such as: I want to give you more input into the things that you are doing that displease God, but I am afraid you will get mad at me. They need to learn that God will guide them with the right words to say, and they need to learn to be God-pleasers, not people pleasers. See Psalm 19:14.

5 The Enlightener 5 3. BE VERY EMOTIONAL Supine counselors may become too emotionally involved with a counselee and be unable to be objective, i.e., they could sympathize with the husband and be upset with the wife or vice versa. In other words, at times, they could tend to want to take sides; therefore, they need to be objective and listen to both sides. Supine counselors can have thoughts such as: I am so upset with this husband/wife that I want to tell them to leave their wife/husband alone! If the Supine counselor is afraid of the counselee, the Supine counselor will pull away and appear aloof thinking, He/She may hurt me next. They need to learn that they cannot take sides because taking sides will alienate their counselees. They also need to learn to have a plan of action in case a counselee does become abusive, i.e., have the cell phone handy to call 911, etc. See Colossians 4: NCCA Atlanta Conference CD The Sarasota Academy of Christian Counseling would like to invite you to be a part of this years NCCA conference by listing to this impactful compilation N.C.C.A. Conference audio CDs set is now available: This 21 CD set is both informative and inspiring. Take a journey with us as we explore many of todays relevant topics for counseling ministries. The CD set is $189 plus shipping and handling. Contact us at to place an order. 4. BE DISTRACTED Supine counselors, once accepted, can be as talkative as a Sanguine or Choleric and can tend to dominate the sessions by sharing about themselves rather than listening to the counselee s problems. Supine counselors can have thoughts such as: I am really enjoying sharing with my counselees! They accept me! We can discuss their problems next session! They need to learn to listen instead of anxiously awaiting their chance to talk. See Ecclesiastes 3:7. PLEASE NOTE: These are temperament tendencies, and, as always, you must take into consideration their walk with the Lord, learned behavior, personality and birth order.

6 The Enlightener 6 BOOK REVIEW GRACE BY MAX LUCADO ~More Than We Deserve, Greater Than We Imagine~ Grace. We talk as though we understand the term. The bank gives us a grace period. The seedy politician falls from grace. Musicians speak of a grace note. We describe an actress as gracious, a dancer as graceful. We use the word for hospitals, baby girls, kings, and premeal prayers. We talk as though we know what grace means. But do we really understand it? Have we settled for wimpy grace? It politely occupies a phrase in a hymn, fits nicely on a church sign. Never causes trouble or demands a response. When asked, Do you believe in grace? who could say no? Max Lucado asks a deeper question: Have you been changed by grace? Shaped by grace? Strengthened by grace? Emboldened by grace? Softened by grace? Snatched by the nape of your neck and shaken to your senses by grace? God s grace has a drenching about it. A wildness about it. A white-water, riptide, turn-you-upside-downness about it. Grace comes after you. It rewires you. From insecure to God secure. From regret riddled to betterbecause-of-it. From afraid to die to ready to fly. Grace is the voice that calls us to change and then gives us the power to pull it off. Let s make certain grace gets you. To order this book please visit: MaxLucado.com