IDENTITY AND SELF ESTEEM

Transcription

1 IDENTITY AND SELF ESTEEM

2 This book is one of seven constituting On My Own Two Feet Educational Resource Materials for use in Substance Abuse Education Worksheets may be copied for educational purposes free and without special permission. Permission for additional use may be obtained from Dept. of Education and Science, Marlborough St., Dublin 1, Ireland An Roinn Oideachais agus Eolaíochta, Department of Education and Science An Roinn Sláinte agus Leanaí, Department of Health and Children Mater Dei Counselling Centre ISBN No nd Edition

3 IDENTITY AND SELF ESTEEM 3

4 CONTENTS INTRODUCTION 5 GRID OUTLINING MATERIALS 10 LESSON 1 GETTING TO KNOW YOU 14 LESSON 2 LEARNING TO LISTEN 16 LESSON 3 GROUP BUILDING 19 LESSON 4 I.D. CARDS 22 LESSON 5 THIS IS ME 27 LESSON 6 LIFELINE 30 LESSON 7 CHANGES 35 LESSON 8 MY HOPES 40 LESSON 9 FAMILY CREST 43 LESSON 10 THAT S LIFE! 47 LESSON 11 SUNSHINE 51 LESSON 12 OPTION A FEEDBACK CIRCLE 55 LESSON 12 OPTION B POSITIVE POSTERS 58 LESSON 13 THINK POSITIVE 61 LESSON 14 SEX ROLES 64 LESSON 15 NOBODY S PERFECT 68 LESSON 16 ACCEPTING POSITIVES 75 4

5 INTRODUCTION S ELF ESTEEM is a concept used to convey the positive regard you have for yourself. It is based on your judgement of your own worth and importance. One s self-picture or selfimage is influenced by one s interaction with others. It reflects the messages received and taken in about oneself from significant others whether these messages are explicit or implicit, verbal or non-verbal, valid or invalid. It is important to realise that small children tend to accept without question most of what they re told about themselves. At that stage of development, children are unable to discriminate between valid and invalid criticism and believe many of the negative messages they receive. If people can gain an understanding of how they can build and support their own self worth it will help considerably in the primary prevention of substance abuse. This understanding will also support preventive work in relation to many personal and interpersonal problems. Teachers who piloted these materials emphasised the need for repeated attention to this area of self esteem, especially for students with a poor self image. One stage in developing self esteem is receiving validation for just being yourself. In order to develop a sense of well being in oneself and to go out into the world with confidence, to try out what one has learned, it is important that the child or young person receives certain messages from others. Parents are the ideal source of these messages, but any significant adult can give the child these messages grandparents, other relations, child-minders, youth leaders and teachers. Children need to know that they are loved and wanted. They need to experience consistency and trust and they need to have clear limits set for them. It is natural to want to be accepted, but if your view of yourself depends excessively on how others rate you, it will be very hard to act autonomously, to make a stand against peer pressure, to take risks, to defend a position and especially to handle criticism and rejection. A goal of identity education must be to help people understand how they have come to have their current self image and to appreciate their own uniqueness and value even when other don t. This work on identity is therefore at the heart of healthy growth and development and will contribute to many areas of the child s life. 5

6 LOW SELF ESTEEM While low self esteem my not have a major part to play in the early stages of drug use, especially in relation to legal drugs, it is an important factor in the progression to abuse of drugs. Any effective work done in building self esteem in school can contribute in a very important way to the prevention of drug abuse in later life. It is crucial for responsible behaviour. Students with low self esteem are very vulnerable in interpersonal relationships; they assume that others do not like them and they feel relatively isolated and lonely. Rosenberg (1965) found adolescents with low self esteem to be awkward in social relationships; they maintained a defensive front; they indulged in boasting with a consequent fear of exposure; they were unable to maintain relationships in a consistent way; and they felt misunderstood and suspicious of others. Low self esteem is manifested in Extreme concern with what other people think. A lack of autonomy and individuality. Boasting or wanting to impress in order to disguise low self esteem. Low self esteem comes from such growing up experiences as: Absence of affection, encouragement, challenge. Conditional love and acceptance. Criticism, ridicule, sarcasm, cynicism. Physical beatings and abuse. Absence of recognition and praise for achievements. Uniqueness not being reinforced. It is reinforced within certain kinds of family and school systems. Troubled systems which foster low self esteem are characterised by: Criticism for being different. Punishment for mistakes. Distorted communication. Inflexible rules. 6

7 HIGH SELF ESTEEM What does high self esteem do for you? Having a strong rooted sense of self worth enables one to cope with both failure and success, to survive mistakes, disappointments and even rejection by others. It is built through the experience of being accepted by others but does not depend excessively on it. A person with high self esteem feels good about all aspects of him/herself and accepts his/her limitations. People with high self esteem show less anxiety and less stress under failure. They are more socially effective, confident and ambitious. They look and feel good, they are effective and productive and they respond to other people and themselves in healthy, positive ways. They make better relationships, are less defensive, are able to handle criticism and don t brag and boast so much. People with self confidence and high self esteem are less likely to abuse drugs. HOW IS HIGH SELF ESTEEM DEVELOPED? Coopersmith (1967) related it to: 1. Almost TOTAL acceptance of the child by his/her parents i.e. unconditional love. 2. Clearly defined and enforced limits of behaviour. 3. Respect for and latitude for individual action within defined limits. 4. High parental self esteem. SCHOOL SUPPORT FOR THE DEVELOPMENT OF SELF ESTEEM High self esteem is very important in all areas of school performance. If the school wishes to compensate as far as possible for some of the effects of society s shortcomings in its treatment of children, then we must ask how the school enhances or erodes the self esteem of students. This means that we must evaluate the signals sent to students about themselves. A sense of belonging is very unlikely to occur in a system which defines one as useless or as a troublemaker. Such policy areas as whether to opt for streaming, banding or mixed ability, and whether to withdraw 7

8 students for extra help or commit resources to team-teaching for weaker classes can have serious implications for how students define themselves. We must also find ways of building up self respect in those we teach and of raising awareness among all members of the school about how supportive, sensitive and positive behaviour towards each other can nurture self esteem. In nurturing systems: individual differences are appreciated; mistakes are not only tolerated but are seen as an opportunity for learning; communication is open; rules are flexible. These features of nurturing systems apply, of course, just as much to the staff room as to the classroom. Indeed, staff development work which includes attention to developing positive interpersonal relationships, building up teacher s own self esteem and which offers opportunities to teachers for support and renewal, will all contribute to the development of a climate supportive of each individual in the school. ISSUES TO CONSIDER IN USING IDENTITY AND SELF ESTEEM MATERIALS In this section, attention is paid to defining who we are as individuals. An important part of this is our sense of family identity. With changing patterns in the traditional family constellation of mother, father and children, it is inevitable that there will be children in differing situations. It is important to be sensitive to the particular background of students and to recognise and acknowledge a number of possible family scenarios. In addition the issue of adoption can be a difficult one for adolescents. The teacher needs to be alert to other situations, which differ from the norm, and to help students feel that they are part of a world in which there is a variety of personal situations. OVERVIEW OF THE MATERIAL The materials in this section focus on building a strong sense of one s identity or sense of self and on exploring how self esteem can be nurtured and developed. 8

9 The section begins in Lessons 1, 2 and 3 with some basic group building and listening exercises. An ability to listen is a sound basis for all healthy and supportive relationships and merits more attention than given here, but excellent materials are available in some of the programmes referenced in the resource section of the School Handbook. Exercises 4, 5, 6, 7, 8 and 9 help students explore who they are their likes, dislikes and opinions, how they see themselves, the changes they are experiencing, their hopes for the future and the importance of family identity as part of their individual identity. Lessons 10 and 11 involve looking at how we build this picture of ourselves through the messages we ve received from others. We then go on in Lessons 12, 13 and 16 to provide experiences of positive feedback and techniques for self support. There are two exercises on body image and sex roles, as body image is crucial to one s overall image and self esteem and because during the pilot phase it emerged as a major preoccupation for some students. Society s expectation of how we should be is examined in both Lessons 14 and 15. LAYOUT OF THE MATERIALS The Grid A grid outlining the materials in this book is provided overleaf. The lessons identified, as core material should be given priority in planning a programme. Lessons identified as optional or reinforcer may be used to meet the needs of particular groups for a different approach or to revisit a topic. The lesson plans are a guide. Individual teachers are encouraged to adapt them to take account of the particular needs of their class and their own teaching style. In most lesson plans additional material is provided. Pages labelled Handout are to be copied for distribution to students. Other material is for teacher reference. References for additional materials on the area addressed in this book can be found in the School Handbook. 9

10 IDENTITY AND SELF ESTEEM AT A GLANCE STAGE TITLE TOPIC METHODOLOGY LINKS WITH CORE OR REINFORCER SUITABLE FOR 1 Getting to Introductions. ID 2 Learning to Listen. Core AG Know You Ground rules. Establishing safety and belonging in a group 2 Learning to Listen Listening skills. Game. Work in pairs. Large group. Pairs. Class discussion. ID 1 Getting to Know You. ID 3 Group Building. Core AG DRUG CONTENT 3 Group Building Drawing up a group contract. Teacher input. Brainstorming. Core JAG Exploring personal identity Who Am I? 4 I.D. Cards Building a sense of personal identity. 5 This is Me Building a sense of personal identity. Games. Small groups. Class discussion Collage, small groups. Class discussion. Core JLV ID 4 I.D. Cards. Reinforcer JAG 6 Lifeline Building of personal identity and group trust. Drawing a lifeline. Small groups. Class discussion. ID 4 I.D. Cards. ID 5 This is Me. ID 10 That s Life! Core AG 7 Changes Growth and development in adolescence 8 My Hopes Hopes and dreams for the future. 9 Family Crest Developing personal identity through family identity. Guided fantasy. Drawing. Pairs/fours. Class discussion. Collage. Pairs. Display. Class discussion. Drawing/worksheet. Small groups. Class discussion. ID 6 Lifeline. Core JAG ID 5 This Is Me. Reinforcer JLV Reinforcer JAG J = Junior Cycle, S = Senior Cycle, V = Verbal, LV = Less Verbal, AG = All Groups In General exercises for JLV will work with older, brighter groups, but those marked S or V will not work with younger or less verbal groups 10

11 IDENTITY AND SELF ESTEEM AT A GLANCE STAGE TITLE TOPIC METHODOLOGY LINKS WITH CORE OR REINFORCER SUITABLE FOR 10 That s Life! Effects of positive AC 15 Criticism. Core JAG and negative messages. The influence of positive and negative messages on one s self picture Self Support Strategies Stereotyping and Body Image 11 Sunshine Effects of positive and negative messages. 12 Option A: Feedback Circle 12 Option B: Positive posters 13 Think Positive Building self esteem through experience of positive feedback. Receiving positive messages from members of the group. Things you can do when feeling down. 14 Sex Roles Exploring stereotypes. 15 Nobody s Perfect (2 parts) Body Image. Picture story. Colouring. Small groups. Brainstorming. Guided fantasy/music. Worksheets. Small groups. Drawing. Feedback circle. Large group discussion. Pairs. Small groups. Drawing/poster work. Class discussion. List positive actions. Write/draw strengths. Thought stopping. Collage. Display. Class discussion or questionnaire. 1) Case study/questionnaire. Small group. Class discussion. 2) Worksheet. Small groups. Design an ad. Positive feedback. ID 10 That s Life! FE 9 Feeling Thermometer. FE 10 Expressing your Feelings. AC 14 Positive Self-Talk. ID 10 That s Life! ID 11 Sunshine ID 10 That s Life! ID 11 Sunshine AC 14 Positive Self Talk. ID 12A Feedback Circle. ID 12B Positive Posters. AC 14 Positive Self Talk ID 7 Changes. ID 15 Nobody s perfect. ID 12B Positive Posters. ID 16 Accepting Positives AC 14 Positive Self Talk Core Select one of the following: 11, 12A or 12B AG Core AG Select one of the following: 11, 12A or 12B Core AG Select one of the following: 11, 12A or 12B Optional AG Core AG Core AG DRUG CONTENT Self Support 16 Accepting Positives Accepting positive things about ourselves Guided fantasy. Small groups. Class discussion. ID 10 That s Life! ID 11 Sunshine ID 12B Positive Posters. ID 13 Think Positive. Reinforcer AG J = Junior Cycle, S = Senior Cycle, V = Verbal, LV = Less Verbal, AG = All Groups In General exercises for JLV will work with older, brighter groups, but those marked S or V will not work with younger or less verbal groups 11

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14 ID Lesson 1 Core AG CORE CONCEPT: Familiarity with each other is essential to group bonding. GETTING TO KNOW YOU PURPOSE To initiate bonding within the group by helping the members to get to know each other. PRACTICAL CONSIDERATIONS This exercise is suitable for a group of any size where members don t all know each other. It will work with all age and ability levels. Sensitivity is required for students who may be living in single parent families, who are adopted or who are in care. Links with: ID 2 Learning to Listen Materials A bean bag or sponge ball if using alternative games PROCEDURE Outline 1. Name game 2. Introduction to pairs 14

15 3. Feedback to large group Detailed Procedure 1. Name game Students are seated in a circle facing the centre. The teacher says his/her name, the next person repeats the teacher s name, and her/his own name I am X and this is Y. The next person says, I am X and this is Y and this is Z and so on until the last person has to introduce the whole class. An alternative is to have the class stand in a circle; one person has a beanbag or sponge ball. S/he throws it to another person who must say his/her own name when catching it. This can go on for a while, and then the rule changes and you now must say the name of the person you re throwing to. 2. Introduction to pairs The students introduce themselves to each other in pairs, A and B: e.g., where they were born, number of brothers and sisters in the family, where they live now, hobbies, hopes for the future, any special achievements. Take about 3 minutes each. 3. Feedback to large group A then introduces B to the whole class and vice-versa until everybody has been introduced. Give partners a chance to clarify any misinformation/ omissions. 15

16 ID Lesson 2 Core AG CORE CONCEPT: The ability to listen and the experience of being really listened to are at the heart of good relationships. LEARNING TO LISTEN PURPOSE To provide practice in better listening. To help participants get to know each other. PRACTICAL CONSIDERATIONS This exercise is included to pinpoint the value of listening before going on to Lesson 3 where a contract or guidelines for helpful behaviour is drawn up. Listening is a skill which can take a lot of time to develop and could merit several sessions. Good material is available from many sources. Links with: ID 1 Getting to Know You, ID 3 Group Building, and all exercises involving interpersonal communication. Materials Copies of Handout 1 Learning to Listen PROCEDURE Outline 1. Pairs brainstorm blocks and channels 2. Pairs practise listening 3. Discussion 4. Homework 16

17 Detailed Procedure 1. Pairs brainstorm blocks and channels Ask the group to move around and choose a partner whom they do not know very well. It should not be the same person they met in Exercise 1 Getting to Know You. Each pair sits together. Tell the class that the purpose of today s lesson is to help us appreciate the value of listening in relationships. Ask pairs to make a list of some of the things people do that tell you they are not really listening (blocks to listening). Take feedback and list on the blackboard. Now ask pairs to make a list of some of the things people do that make it easier to talk to them (channels). Take feedback and list. 2. Pairs practise listening Now get pairs to do another getting to know you exercise concentrating on putting into practice some of the things that help communication/listening. Distribute Handout 1 Learning to Listen to the pairs and explain the procedure. 3. Discussion How did it feel to be listened to? How did it feel to listen? What can we learn from this exercise? 4. Homework Teacher suggests to group: the next time you get into an argument with family or friends try stopping the discussion and agreeing on this rule: each person can speak only after s/he has first re-stated the ideas the other person has expressed. 17

18 ID Lesson 2 Handout 1 LEARNING TO LISTEN Pick someone you do not know well. Steps: 1. One person listens to the other for five minutes. 2. The speaker uses the time to describe the kind of person s/he is, their likes and dislikes, interest, interesting things which they ve done. 3. The listener summarises what the speaker has said at the end of the five minutes. 4. The speaker corrects any misunderstandings in what the listener says and gives the listener some feedback on what s/he did well as a listener. 5. The first listener then takes her/his turn to be listened to for five minutes. 6. The new listener summarises what this speaker has said at the end of five minutes and gets feedback on any misunderstandings and on how well s/he listened. 18

19 ID Lesson 3 Core JAG CORE CONCEPT: A safe atmosphere is needed to facilitate group work. GROUP BUILDING PURPOSE To establish group identity by introducing the concept of working as a team/group. To explain the practical issues involved in working as a group. PRACTICAL CONSIDERATIONS Suitable for all junior cycle groups of any size. Materials Blackboard/chalk Copies of Handout 1 Contract PROCEDURE Outline 1. Introduction 2. Brainstorming group rules 3. Exploration of rules and drawing up contract 19

20 Detailed Procedure 1. Introduction Present the concept of how a team works together, plays together, etc. Give examples of different team groups football teams, pop groups, dance teams, school teams. There are certain elements necessary to make the team work, i.e., a leader, commitment from everybody, rules so that people play the same game and most of all a reason for being there. If the rules are constantly broken the game is spoiled. The purpose of this class is to allow people to speak, to be heard, to help them to think about their development as a person. Since activities are different from other classes we need special rules to make this class work. 2. Brainstorming group rules Brainstorm possible rules for the Social, Personal and Health Education classes. List suggestions on the blackboard. The following core rules need to come out: Honesty Confidentiality Listening closely to each other No put downs Follow instructions 3. Exploration of rules and drawing up of contract Decide on a few simple clear rules which will help people feel good about speaking up in this class. Draw up a contract in agreement with the students. Display on the board. Each student copies the contract onto Handout 1 Contract and keeps their own contract in their folder. VARIATIONS Renaming of group. The teacher introduces the idea of choosing a new name for the class such as sports, pop bands, political parties - choose names. Brainstorm possible names, e.g., United we Stand and choose one. 20

21 ID Lesson 3 Handout 1 CONTRACT I (name) agree to play my part in making (name class/group) a great group/team. The rules of this team are:

22 ID Lesson 4 Core JLV CORE CONCEPT: Sharing self-statements and opinions and having them accepted by others helps to foster one s sense of identity. I.D. CARDS PURPOSE To enhance students sense of identity by giving them an opportunity to make statements about themselves, their likes and dislikes. To develop group cohesion through sharing and self-disclosure. To create an opportunity for every member of the group to take time to speak out in the large group (especially important for reticent members). PRACTICAL CONSIDERATIONS This exercise is suitable for less verbal students. Have students sit in a circle if possible. Give encouragement to have a go but allow participants to pass if they really wish to. As the group progresses, encourage a little more sharing. Cards are allocated stars according to difficulty more stars indicate more challenging cards. Photocopy Handout 1 back-to-back. Materials A soft ball ID cards from pack Copies of Handout 1 Me PROCEDURE Outline 1. Warm up game 22

23 2. Sharing opinions and views, using cards 3. Small group discussion 4. Report back to large group 5. Small group discussion on difficulties of sharing 6. Large group discussion 7. Homework Detailed Procedure 1. Warm up game Use a soft ball students throw it to each other and the person holding it tells something about themselves, e.g., I like My favourite food is S/he then throws it to someone else. 2. Sharing opinions and views, using cards Seat students in a circle: give the pack of cards to the first person. Tell the students you are going to play a card game in which you will take turns to tell the group something about yourself or your opinions about some things. Each person will turn over a card in turn, read it and decide if they want to finish the statement. There must be no pressure on anyone to share if they do not wish to. If a student doesn t want to share just say, If you do not wish to share just put the card on the bottom of the pack and pass it on. It is then the next person s turn. If they do share, they must agree to make honest statements. After each person makes a statement, other people can comment, ask questions, or share their own response to the statement. It is important that time is given for this sharing and that it is not simply a question of rushing through the cards. 3. Small group discussion When the cards are finished, ask students to get into groups of three or four and share reactions to the exercise. How did it feel when you are going to pick up a card? What sorts of things are easy for you to share? What sorts of things are difficult to share? 23

24 4. Report back to large group Report to large group and discuss. 5. Small group discussion on difficulties of sharing In small groups again, discuss, Did you think other people were interest in hearing your statement? How could you tell? Is it hard for anyone to speak out in the group? What makes it hard? How well were people listening? What would make it easier for you to speak in the large group? Is there anything the rest of the group could do to help? 6. Large group discussion Report to large group and discuss. 7. Homework Homework: Give each student a copy of Handout 1 Me and ask them to complete it for homework. It should then be kept in their folders as part of their work on identity. It may also be useful in later work on social skills especially starting and maintaining a conversation. VARIATIONS Withdraw some cards or add in others to suit your group. Arrange cards in order of difficulty. See Handout 1 Me one asterisk indicates easy to share cards, three asterisks indicate most difficult. Get students to Write ten complete sentences you would use to describe yourself to someone who doesn t know you. Get students to write their own cards. 24

25 ID Lesson 4 Handout 1 ME * My birthday is on I am years old * If I could have any name I liked, I would choose * When I get a headache I ** My favourite person outside my family is * A funny thing that happened to me was * A silly thing I once did was ** The worst thing about school is ** People who sniff glue * A kind thing I once did was ** My favourite person in the family is * When I grow up I will * I have eyes and hair * My favourite television programme is ** I hate ** I am good at ** People who get drunk *** I have a problem with ** I have no problems with * The best thing about school is * Cigarette smoking * I think friends should 25

26 *** When people are really afraid of something *** The scariest thing that ever happened to me was * I really want to ** The person who was kindest to my in my whole life was ** I love * My favourite food is * My favourite drink is * I like people who ** I think a good teacher ** A brave thing I did once was ** A person who has been a good friend to me *** I was upset when * The most interesting thing about school is ** The thing which made me most nervous was ** I wish *** When I m worried about something I * If I had 5,000 I would * My favourite possession is 26

27 ID Lesson 5 Reinforcer JAG CORE CONCEPT: Having a clear self-picture helps to foster one s sense of identity and is important in social interactions. THIS IS ME PURPOSE To help students develop a clear self-picture. PRACTICAL CONSIDERATIONS This is most suitable for smaller groups but with very good organisation and a double period it can work with larger classes. A double period is ideal, but it can be done in two separate sessions. It can be noisy. You need to build up a stock of magazines/papers to ensure a good selection and variety of material as a limited choice of materials inevitably limits the scope. Ask students to bring a photo of themselves to school and to collect magazines as they are going to make a poster that tells about themselves. Links with: ID 4 ID Cards Materials Photos, magazines, crayons, newsprint, glue, scissors 27

28 PROCEDURE Outline 1. Distribute materials 2. Collage 3. Small groups sharing 4. Large group discussion 5. Display work Detailed Procedure 1. Distribute materials Provide each student with paper for a poster and have a collection of magazines, crayons and glue available. 2. Collage Ask students to put a photo of themselves on the poster (in the centre of the page, perhaps) and to select pictures that describe them. Ask them to illustrate some of the following areas on their posters: Likes and dislikes Hobbies People who are important to me Things that concern me (e.g., poverty, hunger, etc.) Special abilities Qualities (e.g., considerate, energetic, etc.) How I want to be (e.g., type of person, what I want to do) Tell the student that they may use colours, shapes, and scenes to represent something. It is not important that someone else understand it when they look at it. It will make sense to the person who makes it and that is all that matters. Ask the students to paste the pictures, words and symbols onto their poster paper to make a poster. 28

29 NOTE: For weaker students, limit the number of areas to be illustrated and keep ideas concrete. 3. Small groups sharing When students have made the posters, ask them to join up with three or four other students to share/talk to each other about some of what they have on their posters and get reactions. Point out that there are times when we want to keep some things to ourselves and do not want to tell anyone else. They should therefore, share only what they want to. Everyone has this right and it should be respected. 4. Large group discussion Pointers for discussion: How did you feel doing the exercise? What was it like talking about yourself in the group? What is special/different about you? 5. Display work Display posters in the classroom. Note for the class that all the posters are somewhat different unique - just as each person is unique. If pictures seem stereotyped, raise this as a discussion point. VARIATIONS Share pictures in pairs Do the collage at home 29

30 ID Lesson 6 Core AG CORE CONCEPT: Having a clear picture of one s own story helps to foster a sense of identity. LIFELINE PURPOSE To enhance each student s sense of identity through looking at him/herself in a new way. To facilitate personal sharing and hence develop a climate of trust in the group. To provide a basis for the introduction of drugs (in the context of growth and development) later in the work. PRACTICAL CONSIDERATIONS This exercise is suitable for all groups. There is always a need for sensitivity to students whose history or circumstances do not fit the norm. For older/brighter students the instructions do not need to be so concrete. The Lifeline questionnaire (Handout 1) can be used as an aid. NOTE: Children who are, or who have been, in care or who are adopted may not know some of their own story. It is, therefore, important to know the background of your students before doing this exercise so that you can help them and be sensitive to this. If there are large gaps in their knowledge it would be useful to see whether they can get some help in answering the questions they may have, since knowing one s own story is so important to the development of a strong sense of identity. Contact with adoptive parents, foster parents, social worker through the school counsellor, will facilitate this. Links with: ID 4 ID Cards, ID 5 This is Me, ID 10 That s Life! Materials Newsprint, a good supply of crayons and felt pens, masking tape For Senior Cycle: Copies of Handout 1 Lifeline PROCEDURE 30

31 Outline 1. Introduction 2. Distribute materials 3. Instruction for Lifeline 4. Sharing in small groups 5. Large group discussion 6. Display lifelines 7. Closing Detailed Procedure 1. Introduction Do a warm-up game if desired. Introduction: Many people and events influence the kind of people we become, in good ways and sometimes in bad ways. We re going to look at some of these in today s class and get to know each other at the same time. 2. Distribute materials Ask each person to take a sheet of newsprint and a supply of felt pens or crayons. People can easily work from a common supply. 3. Instruction for Lifeline Vary the following instructions according to the age/ability level of the group. Instructions in brackets are optional. You are going to draw a picture that represents your life up to now. This picture will be in the shape of a line. We will call it your Lifeline. Your lifeline can be any shape, and can go in any direction. It can be a road, or a river or a path. (It is very useful with slower students to draw a simplified version of your own lifeline to demonstrate). Place a mark near the beginning of your lifeline for your date of birth and write in when you were born. Write the age you are now at the other end and show your life continuing on past today s date If you like, you can now divide your line into the number of years that have passed. 31

32 (1) EVENTS Now fill in on your lifeline some of the following EVENTS from your past. (These can be written on a big chart and displayed for reference). You can use drawings, cartoons, labels, or signs (e.g., the sun to show happiness; a monster to show someone who reminds you of a monster). Use different colours to show your different feelings. Write words too, if you want to. Do not worry about whether you are any good at drawing. Anyone can draw a line and it is not a competition. Select a limited number of ideas for younger/weaker classes. The date you were born Your first day at playgroup or pre-school Your first day at primary school Your first Communion and Confirmation Some happy events Some unhappy or sad events that happened to you Something that made you mad Some success you had The most exciting thing that ever happened to you (2) PEOPLE Now put in some PEOPLE who have had a very important influence on you at different stages. Some suggestions: Who took care of you or helped you at the different stages? You can put in several different people, but be sure to include those who meant most to you. Parents Nurses Doctors Childminders Babysitters Grandparents Sisters Brothers Teachers Which friends were most important to you? Show whether they were a good influence or a bad influence by using some sign. NOTE: Give as much time as needed for this stage. Keep an eye out for students who are having difficulty and help them to fill in the line. Be careful not to push as some students may be remembering unhappy experiences. Help them to fill in easier ones e.g., first day at school. 4. Sharing in small groups 32

33 When you have completed your lifeline, get into groups of three and share some of it with your partners. Instructions in brackets are optional. What were the most important events? Who were the most important people in your life up to now? What is the most interesting bit? Why? (What are the parts you like to think about? Why?) (What are the parts you don t like? Why?) Listen carefully and ask each other questions. The teacher should circulate round groups to help if needed. 5. Large group discussion Feed back to large group and share for a few moments. Keep discussion brief and simple for less able classes and finish with happy events. Who was the most important person for most people? What was the most interesting thing you learned about the others in your sub-group? What differences did you notice between people their likes and dislikes what makes them happy or sad? What were some of the happy events? 6. Display lifelines Ask students to put their initials on the back and if there is time they can post their lifelines around the room for sharing and discussion. Keep them for the class in a large art folder for future reference, as they will not fit into their folders. 7. Closing In small groups ask them to tell each other one thing they enjoyed about this exercise. VARIATIONS Introduce with a guided fantasy as in ID 11 Sunshine Break into two stages one for events, one for people/influences. Use a straight line marked off into years and colour in each segment according to the feelings you have about that part of your life. 33

34 ID Lesson 6 Handout 1 Senior Cycle LIFELINE Some aids in constructing your lifeline: 1. Who have been the most influential people in your life and in what way have they been influential? 2. What were the major interests in your early life? 3. What were the most critical things that have happened that made you what you are? (They may be positive or negative), 4. What were the most important successes and failures in your life? 5. What have been the most significant decisions of your life? 34

35 ID Lesson 7 Core JAG CORE CONCEPT: One of the main tasks of adolescence is to cope with change. CHANGES PURPOSE To explore changes associated with adolescence. To explore feelings about these changes. To reassure students about individual differences in growth and development. PRACTICAL CONSIDERATIONS Suitable for all groups at junior cycle but especially 1 st years. It may take two classes. The introduction to this exercise refers back to the Lifeline. If that has not been already included it could be included here. If not, the introduction needs to be changed. When beginning the guided fantasy, take time to make sure everyone is sitting comfortably, in good contact with the chair. Invite them to shift about, loosen tense areas and take some deep breaths. Speak quietly and slowly when giving directions. Links with: ID 6 Lifeline. Materials Copies of Handout 1 How I am Now Copies of Handout 2 Sample Agenda for Enquiry with Parents Paper, crayons PROCEDURE Outline 1. Introduction 35

36 2. Short guided fantasy 3. Drawing 4. Discuss in pairs 5. Questionnaire How I Am Now 6. Discussion small groups 7. Large group discussion Detailed Procedure 1. Introduction Distribute crayons and paper before beginning. Ideas for introduction: when we drew our lifelines we looked at different stages in our life, different influences, things that happened to us. We saw some of the different things we did at each stage and how we were changing. A lot of changes have happened since we were born walking, talking, going to school, getting taller, learning to cycle, having friends. We have had to learn things all the time. Now as a teenager you are changing in many ways and have more responsibility for your life. Let us look at how you have changed since you were ten years old. 2. Short guided fantasy I want you to close your eyes and relax. Breathe in and out in your usual way. Notice if your breathing is shallow or deep, slow or swift. Can you gradually establish a pattern of smooth, deep, slow breathing? Breathe in breathe out slowly. Now I want you to think of yourself when you were ten years old. What class were you in at school? What did the classroom look like? Where did you sit? Who were your friends? What did you look like? How tall were you? How had you your hair? What sort of clothes did you wear? What did you like to do? What was your favourite TV programme? What sort of child were you were you lively, quiet, considerate, shy, or confident? What were you like? 3. Drawing When you are ready, I want you to open your eyes and draw a picture of yourself as a 10-year old. Put some of the things that you ve been thinking about in the picture. Use colours, words, or scenes to illustrate what you were like as a 10-year-old. 36

37 4. Discuss in pairs In pairs, describe your picture to your partner and explain what you remember about yourself as a 10-year-old. 5. Questionnaire How I Am Now Now we are going to look at how you have changed since you were 10 years old. Distribute Handout 1 How I Am Now? and ask students to complete the questionnaire individually. Alternatively: ask students to list ways in which they ve changed as individuals since they were 10. Include changes in body, feelings, thinking, and behaviour. 6. Discussion small groups When they have completed Handout 1 or listing, ask them to form small groups of 4/5 of same sex and to compare similarities and differences. It is important to stress that differences are normal physical changes happen at different times for different people. Remember to point out that no one should be pressurised to talk about things that they do not want to talk about. 7. Large group discussion Take feedback and discuss the changes and feelings about those changes; what they like and dislike about being a teenager. Compare the findings of different sex groups. 8. Optional if time allows Ask students to list some situations in which they have to make choices/decisions now or within the next year. These are situations that they didn t meet up until now. List the situations on chart/blackboard. Select the situations that were identified most frequently and ask the students to identify the various options appropriate for these situations. ADDITIONAL WORK: Enquiry with parents of class Project Work: ask students to talk to their own parents or other parents about their teenage years. In class prepare an agenda/questionnaire to be used with parents. See Handout 2 Sample Agenda for Enquiry with Parents. Role play asking parents to participate in the project. When the enquiry is completed, discuss the experience and review the information obtained. 37

38 ID Lesson 7 Handout 1 HOW I AM NOW Below are some statements about how you may have changed since you were 10 years old. If you agree with the statement put a tick in the box. If you disagree with the statement put a cross in the box. If you are not sure, leave the box blank. There are no right or wrong answers. We are all different, even though we have many similarities. Compared to what I was like when I was 10 years old: I am taller I am heavier My body is more hairy I get more spots now My hair is more greasy I sweat more I have stronger muscles The shape of my body has changed My voice has changed My moods change often I am more easily annoyed I get embarrassed more easily I have more secrets I fight more with my parents I am more interested in the opposite sex I want to get my own way more I make more decisions I am more concerned about other people I notice things that are not fair and just in the world I smoke I drink alcohol I want to be accepted by my own age group I don t want to be different from my friends 38

39 ID Lesson 7 Handout 2 SAMPLE AGENDA FOR ENQUIRY WITH PARENTS What was there to do outside of home when you were a teenager? What did you do outside of home? How were you expected to behave: at home? - outside of home? What did you like and dislike about being a teenager at that time? What sort of picture of yourself did you try to give others? Did you smoke? Did many young people smoke? Did you drink? Did many young people drink? 39

40 ID Lesson 8 Reinforcer JLV CORE CONCEPT: Increased self-awareness enhances one s ability to make responsible choices. MY HOPES PURPOSE To increase self awareness PRACTICAL CONSIDERATIONS This is more suitable for smaller groups but with very good organisation and a double period it can work with larger classes. A double period is ideal, but it can be done in two separate sessions. It can be noisy. You need to build up a stock of magazines/papers to ensure a good selection and variety of material as a limited choice of materials inevitably limits the scope. Ask students to bring a photo of themselves to school and to collect magazines as they are going to make a poster that tells about themselves. When considering things students would like to try, it is important to keep in mind the fact that we are all curious beings and that teenagers, in particular, wish to experiment in some areas of their lives. Students may include activities that we would consider dangerous, but wanting to try does not necessarily imply that they will try. The issues arising should be discussed, however. Links with: ID 5 This Is Me Materials Sheets of paper, selection of magazines, scissors, glue, crayons and markers 40

41 Blue-tack or masking tape PROCEDURE Outline 1. Collage 2. Discussion in pairs 3. Display 4. Large group discussion Detailed Procedure 1. Collage Ask the students to make a collage that illustrates how they d like to be, their hopes and dreams for the future, by selecting pictures and words form the magazines and by writing and drawing. Some areas that may be included are: things I d like to have how I d like to be things I d like to try new experiences I d like to have the sort of lifestyle I d like to have (If you have made a poster of This Is Me in Lesson 5 already, refer back to it this one is now looking to the future). 2. Discussion in pairs When the students have completed the collage ask them to choose a partner and to share aspects of the collage. They should feel free to share only what they want to. 3. Display Display collages on the wall or place on the floor in front of each person. 41

42 4. Large group discussion Large group feedback and discussion. Encourage description of collages by a number of people before moving on to more abstract questions. Would anyone describe their collage and why they included certain things? Did your collage tell you anything about yourself? Did your partner s collage tell you anything about him/her? Are there trends emerging of how people would like to be, or of what they d like to try? Are there differences between boys and girls? 42

43 ID Lesson 9 Reinforcer JAG CORE CONCEPT: One s family identity is a central part of one s personal identity. FAMILY CREST PURPOSE To help students to get to know each other through sharing information about their families. To increase students awareness of the importance of family identity as part of our individual identity. PRACTICAL CONSIDERATIONS The exercise is suitable for junior classes of any size and level of ability. This could be the first of a series of exercises on families. It is a fairly easy exercise for most students and discussion can be kept at a concrete level, especially if dealing with less able students. Please note that this exercise may be difficult for students who do not have a conventional family. Be sensitive to this and help the students involved to identify those who have acted as family to them. This could be a grandparent, foster parent, housemother, aunt, uncle, etc. These people play as vital a role for some students as biological parents. It would be a good example of openness and sharing if you demonstrated by briefly sharing your own Family Crest. Materials Copies of Handout 1 Family Crest Coloured pencils/crayons and newsprint/poster paper for each student 43

44 Your own Family Crest, if you are going to share it out. PROCEDURE Outline 1. Drawing of Family Crest 2. Small group sharing of drawings and discussion 3. Large group discussion 4. Homework Detailed Procedure 1. Drawing of Family Crest Distribute a blank copy of Handout 1 Family Crest or get students to draw their own. Ask each student to make a coat of arms representing their family and to draw a picture in each segment showing the following elements. The number of people in your immediate family. A happy occasion in your family. The person in your family who makes you feel good about yourself. The person in your family your fight with most. An achievement or success in your family. A sad occasion in your family. Many other ideas could be used to fill the sections of the shield. Devise your own to suit your students. If you are uncomfortable with any, substitute something else. Other possibilities: The quietest person in your family. The most generous person in your family. The best outing/holiday you ever had in your family. 44

45 2. Small group sharing of drawings and discussion Ask students to from groups of three or four and to describe their drawings to each other. Ask them to discuss the following questions: What similarities are there in your families? How are your families the same? What makes your family special? How are your families different? What do you like best about your family? What do you like least about your family? 3. Large group discussion What did you learn from this exercise? Was it easy or hard to do? What made it easy/hard? Does anyone want to say anything else about families? 4. Homework Students can copy/paste their crest into their journal. VARIATIONS Do a group motto/crest, e.g., You ll never walk alone. Show Heraldic map and link to know family shields. Bring in two photos of family occasions and talk about them. 45

46 ID Lesson 9 Handout 1 FAMILY CREST 46

47 ID Lesson 10 Core JAG CORE CONCEPT: Self concept and self esteem are built up through the messages, both positive and negative, verbal and non-verbal, that we receive from others. THAT S LIFE PURPOSE To help students to identify and understand the effects of negative and positive messages. To help students to identify positive and negative messages they have recently received. PRACTICAL CONSIDERATIONS This exercise is suitable for junior cycle students of all ability levels. In this exercise a lot of the work is done in small groups with the teacher keeping it moving by taking feedback at intervals and setting new tasks. The words bad and good are used for ease of understanding by weaker students. Substitute positive/negative if appropriate for your class. Links with: AC 15 Criticism. Materials Copies of Handout 1 A Day in the life of Seán Maguire Crayons/colouring pencils 47

48 PROCEDURE Outline 1. Introduction 2. Explore the picture story for feelings using colouring/discussion 3. Listing good and bad messages received, sharing 4. Identifying someone who gives you good comments and someone to whom you would like to give a good comment 5. Homework Detailed Procedure 1. Introduction Introduce the exercise by saying that we re going to look at how we are affected by the way other people treat us. If a number of people gave you good comments all day, how would you feel? You would probably remember, and as you get more and more you save them up and you feel good. If you have been getting good comments from people all day you will be more likely to give a good comment to someone else. The same thing happens with bad comments. If people have been giving you bad comments all day, you may go home feeling bad and the first thing anyone says can set you off and get you mad at them. 2. Explore the picture story for feelings using colouring/discussion Distribute Handout 1 A Day in the Life of Seán Maguire and ask students to look at it. Taking once scene at a time, ask students to colour the pictures, picking colours that show how each person in the picture is feeling. Ask them to share in groups of three. Take feedback from the groups and discuss the feelings of the different people in each scene. 48

49 Ask groups to look at the scenes again and to pick out the good and bad comments and note who they came from. How important are these people to us? How do you think Seán was feeling at the end of the day? 3. Listing good and bad messages received, sharing In groups, ask the class to list good comments and bad comments they have received in the past 24 hours and note them on a sheet of paper. Discuss how you felt and how the other person s tone or manner influenced you. Take feedback from the small groups and write up briefly on the blackboard under headings: (1) Verbal Message. (2) Tone of Voice/Manner. (3) How you felt? Remind the class, if necessary, of the non-verbal messages they may also have received and ask for some examples (being ignored, included, pushed, etc.). Ask the class to brainstorm what colours/words would describe the feelings they themselves have when receiving each kind of message hot, cold, warm, sad, delighted, small, etc. (Students may need help with feelings words see section on Feelings.) Add these under the third column. 4. Identifying someone who gives you good comments In small groups ask students to share with each other who, in their lives, is the person from whom they get the most good messages or comments and how they feel about that person. How does that person influence how you feel about yourself? 5. Homework Ask students to identify at least one person to whom they would like to give a positive message before the next session and if they wish to share this with their small group. A goal sheet, as used in the Assertive Communication section, can be used to record success. 49