A LETTER FROM THE PUBLISHER

Transcription

1 RELATIONSHIP BETWEEN CHILDHOOD TRAUMA AND ADDICTION FROM PRESCRIPTION DRUG SAMPLES TO ADDICTION: ONE DOCTOR S JOURNEY TO HELL AND BACK - AS SICK AS OUR SECRETS HOW TO ENJOY THE HOLIDAYS WHEN YOU OR YOUR LOVED ONE HAS AN ADDICTION ALCOHOL: THE EFFECT ON MIND, BODY & SPIRIT ADDICTION: A NEUROBIOLOGICAL ILLNESS AND STRESS REGULATORY DISORDER INTERVENTIONS- THE FIRST STEP THE DANGERS OF LAUNCHING WHILE INTOXICATED - LWI AND ARRESTED DEVELOPMENT SEASON S GREETINGS FROM SUNCOAST REHABILITATION CENTER ADDICTION WITHOUT DRUGS-A GROWING MENACE! IS ADDICTION TREATMENT REALLY EFFECTIVE? RAISING BRADY THE PATIENT PROTECTION AND AFFORDABLE CARE ACT FORCES SUBSTANCE ABUSE TREATMENT TO RETHINK BUSINESS MODELS

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3 A LETTER FROM THE PUBLISHER Dear Readers, I welcome you to The Sober World magazine. This magazine is being directly mailed each month to anyone that has been arrested due to drugs and alcohol in Palm Beach County. It is also distributed locally to all Palm Beach County High School Guidance Counselors, Middle School Coordinators, Palm Beach County Drug Court, Broward County School Substance Abuse Expulsion Program, Broward County Court Unified Family Division, Local Colleges and other various locations. We also directly mail to many rehabs throughout the state and country. We are expanding our mission to assist families worldwide in their search for information about Drug and Alcohol Abuse. Our monthly magazine is available for free on our website at If you would like to receive an E-version monthly of the magazine, please send your address to patricia@thesoberworld.com Drug addiction has reached epidemic proportions throughout the country and is steadily increasing. It is being described as the biggest man-made epidemic in the United States. More people are dying from drug overdoses than from any other cause of injury death, including traffic accidents, falls or guns. Many Petty thefts are drug related, as the addicts need for drugs causes them to take desperate measures in order to have the ability to buy their drugs. The availability of prescription narcotics is overwhelming; as parents our hands are tied. Doctors continue writing prescriptions for drugs such as Oxycontin, and Oxycodone (which is an opiate drug and just as addictive as heroin) to young adults in their 20 s and 30 s right up to the elderly in their 70 s, thus, creating a generation of addicts. Did you know that Purdue Pharma, the company that manufactures Oxycontin generated $3.1 BILLION in revenue in 2010? Scary isn t it? Addiction is a disease but there is a terrible stigma attached to it. As family members affected by this disease, we are often too ashamed to speak to anyone about our loved ones addiction, feeling that we will be judged. We try to pass it off as a passing phase in their lives, and some people hide their head in the sand until it becomes very apparent such as through an arrest, getting thrown out of school or even worse an overdose, that we realize the true extent of their addiction. I know that many of you who are reading this now are frantic that their loved one has been arrested. No parent ever wants to see his or her child arrested or put in jail, but this may be your opportunity to save your child or loved one s life. They are more apt to listen to you now than they were before, when whatever you said may have fallen on deaf ears. This is the point where you know your loved one needs help, but you don t know where to begin. I have compiled this informative magazine to try to take that fear and anxiety away from you and let you know there are many options to choose from. There are Psychologists and Psychiatrists that specialize in treating people with addictions. There are Education Consultants that will work with you to figure out what your loved ones needs are and come up with the best plan for them. There are Interventionists who will hold an intervention and try to convince your loved one that they need help. There are detox centers that provide medical supervision to help them through the withdrawal process, There are Transport Services that will scoop up your resistant loved one (under 18 yrs. old) and bring them to the facility you have chosen. There are long term Residential Programs (sometimes a year and longer) as well as short term programs (30-90 days), there are Therapeutic Boarding Schools, Wilderness programs, Extended Living and there are Sober Living Housing where they can work, go to meetings and be accountable for staying clean. Many times a Criminal Attorney will try to work out a deal with the court to allow your child or loved one to seek treatment as an alternative to jail. I know how overwhelming this period can be for you and I urge every parent or relative of an addict to get some help for yourself. There are many groups that can help you. There is Al-Anon, Alateen (for teenagers), Families Anonymous, Nar-Anon and more. This is a disease that affects the whole family, not just the parents. These groups allow you to share your thoughts and feelings. As anonymous groups, your anonymity is protected. Anything said within those walls are not shared with anyone outside the room. You share only your first name, not your last name. This is a wonderful way for you to be able to openly convey what has been happening in your life as well as hearing other people share their stories. You will find that the faces are different but the stories are all too similar. You will also be quite surprised to see how many families are affected by drug and alcohol addiction. Addiction knows no race or religion; it affects the wealthy as well as the poor, the highly educated, old, young-it MAKES NO DIFFERENCE. This magazine is dedicated to my son Steven who graduated with top honors from University of Central Florida. He graduated with a degree in Psychology, and was going for his Masters in Applied Behavioral Therapy. He was a highly intelligent, sensitive young man who helped many people get their lives on the right course. He could have accomplished whatever he set his mind out to do. Unfortunately, after graduating from college he tried a drug that was offered to him not realizing how addictive it was and the power it would have over him. My son was 7 months clean when he relapsed and died of a drug overdose. I hope this magazine helps you find the right treatment for your loved one. They have a disease and like all diseases, you try to find the best care suited for their needs. They need help. Deaths from prescription drug overdose have been called the silent epidemic for years. There is approximately one American dying every 17 minutes from an accidental prescription drug overdose. Please don t allow your loved one to become a statistic. I hope you have found this magazine helpful. You may also visit us on the web at We are also on Face Book at The Sober World and Sober-World Steven. I want to wish everyone a Happy Hloiday. Sincerely, Patricia Publisher Patricia@TheSoberWorld.com To Advertise, Call

4 IMPORTANT HELPLINE NUMBERS 211 PALM BEACH/TREASURE COAST FOR THE TREASURE COAST FOR TEENAGERS AAHOTLINE-NORTH PALM BEACH AA HOTLINE- SOUTH COUNTY FLORIDA ABUSE HOTLINE AL-ANON- PALM BEACH COUNTY AL-ANON- NORTH PALM BEACH FAMILIES ANONYMOUS (USA) (LOCAL) CENTER FOR GROUP COUNSELING CO-DEPENDENTS ANONYMOUS COCAINE ANONYMOUS COUNCIL ON COMPULSIVE GAMBLING CRIMESTOPPERS TIPS (8477) CRIME LINE TIPS (8477) DEPRESSION AND MANIC DEPRESSION FLORIDA DOMESTIC VIOLENCE HOTLINE FLORIDA HIV/AIDS HOTLINE 800-FLA-AIDS ( ) FLORIDA INJURY HELPLINE GAMBLERS ANONYMOUS and HEPATITUS B HOTLINE JEWISH FAMILY AND CHILD SERVICES LAWYER ASSISTANCE MARIJUANA ANONYMOUS NARC ANON FLORIDA REGION NARCOTICS ANONYMOUS-PALM BEACH NATIONAL RUNAWAY SWITCHBOARD 800-RUNAWAY ( ) NATIONAL SUICIDE HOTLINE SUICIDE ( ) ONLINE MEETING FOR MARIJUANA OVEREATERS ANONYMOUS- BROWARD COUNTY OVEREATERS ANONYMOUS- PALM BEACH COUNTY RUTH RALES JEWISH FAMILY SERVICES WOMEN IN DISTRESS PALM BEACH COUNTY MEETING HALLS CENTRAL HOUSE 2170 W ATLANTIC AVE. SW CORNER OF ATLANTIC & CONGRESS CLUB OASIS CROSSROADS EASY DOES IT LAMBDA NORTH CLUBHOUSE THE MEETING PLACE THE TRIANGLE CLUB BROWARD COUNTY MEETING HALLS 12 STEP HOUSE SW 23RD STREET 101 CLUB 700 SW 10TH DRIVE & DIXIE HWY LAMBDA SOUTH CLUB POMPANO BEACH GROUP SW CORNER OF SE 2ND & FEDERAL HWY PRIDE CENTER WEST BROWARD CLUB Miracles DO Happen HOPE. BELIEVE. RECOVER. A STRUCTURED, WOMEN--ONLY TRANSITIONAL HOUSING PROGRAM IN DELRAY BEACH, FLORIDA Millie Tennessee, Executive Director

5 ADVERTISING OPPORTUNITIES For more information or to arrange a tour please call Intakes can be completed the same day. LIKE us on Facebook: HARMONY ON THE BEACH To Advertise, Call Structured Recovery Community Living On-Site Facilities Manager and Recovery Coach On-Site 12 Step Support Meetings Weekly Relapse Prevention Group Clinically Directed Clinical Support from Fully Licensed Treatment Center Licensed Physician on Staff Outpatient Treatment available at licensed treatment center transportation provided Employment Assistance Safe, Fun Environment Zero Tolerance Pool and BBQ on premise Short Walk to Beautiful Hollywood Beach DirecTV and Wireless Internet Access And much more CLEVELAND STREET, HOLLYWOOD, FLORIDA The Sober World. is a FREE magazine for families and parents who have loved ones with addiction problems. We offer an E-version of the magazine monthly. If you are interested in having a copy ed, please send your request to patricia@thesoberworld.com For Advertising opportunities in our magazine please contact Patricia at In the new format, you will find our expanded list of resources and services, important links and announcements, gift, books and articles from contributors throughout the country. As part of our effort to improve our magazines online presence, we now have included an interactive forum where we invite and encourage you to voice your opinion, share your thoughts and experiences. We strongly encourage those in recovery and seeking recovery to join the forums as well. Please note: Our forum allows you to leave comments anonymously. Please visit us on Face Book at The Sober World or Sober-World Steven Again, I would like to thank all my advertisers that have made this magazine possible, and have given us the ability to reach people around the world that are affected by drug or alcohol abuse. I can t tell you all the people that have reached out to thank us for providing this wonderful resource. For more information contact Patricia at

6 The relationship between traumatic experiences in childhood and the later onset of addictive behaviors in adulthood is undeniable. A tremendous amount of research has shown a direct correlation between traumatic experiences per childhood and addictive behaviors later in life. While addictive behaviors are masking the real problem; the addiction itself becomes the forefront of the person s persona. Addictions come in an array of issues stemming from chemical and substance abuse, to pornography and sex addiction, to gambling and financial addictions, to a broad array of addictive attachments. Through our addictive attachments we are seeking to fill the voids, or perceived emptiness, within our lives. The addictive attachment has been shown to fill the void of the human bond or attachment that was underdeveloped in childhood. The underdeveloped attachment is frequently caused by childhood abuse, traumatic experiences, neglect and maltreatment. The Nature of Addiction A recent study found that women who experienced severe physical or sexual abuse during childhood were much more likely to have a food addiction as adults than women who did not experience such abuse. The study s findings provide valuable new information regarding potential causes and treatments for food addiction and obesity. Addiction recovery specialists have been addressing this link for years with their patients, and self-help groups have much experience with it. Addiction issues are just as prevalent in males. It used to be thought that women were not as susceptible to addictive tendencies, characteristics, and/or vices. Therefore, many of the addictive models and treatments programs were intentionally created for the treatment of men. Although research has shown that men are more likely to develop and maintain addictive issues;...research also suggests that since the 1970s, this gender gap has been narrowing, as drinking by women has become more socially acceptable. (Harvard Mental Health, 2010, Newsletter) THE MINDSET OF THE ADDICT... The addict is not necessarily seeking the addictive vice; rather they are seeking to fill a void that has been plaguing them throughout their human evolution. While the addictive personalities do vary, one singular idea remains the same; the addict has an innate desire to feel, to experience, to be attached. While what they are seeking to fulfill may vary; the very notion of feeling, experiencing, and being alive is true in a majority of cases. The mind of the addict yearns for fulfillment. Although many of my counterparts may explain the mind of the addict as being chemically dependent upon the vice, the truth is, all addictive personalities have a very similar need; fulfillment. While there is no doubt that a chemical imbalance, or need, is a common theme amongst many addicts; there is also a similar deprivation that stems from childhood traumatic experiences and an inability to properly attach. As a clinician, I have yet to encounter an addict without an egregious history or a traumatic experience. It is not to say that there could not be an addict without an egregious past, but there appears to be a common theme of lacking of attachment amongst a majority of those who have addictive personalities. Now let s clarify, not every person who has been traumatized has been incapable of properly attaching to a parental figure; however, in a majority of cases, attachment is made insecure when abuse is endured within the home. If, a child is incapable of feeling and experiencing an environment of safety within the home, the likelihood of becoming detached is greatly increased. Early trauma also has consequences for how human beings respond to stress throughout their lives, and stress has everything to do with addiction. Stress is a physiological response mounted by an organism when it is confronted with excessive demands on its coping mechanisms, whether biological or psychological. It is an attempt to maintain internal biological and chemical stability, or homeostasis, in the face of these excessive demands. In relationship to childhood abuse and trauma, homeostasis is the ability to remain balanced in the face of imbalance or instability. It occurs when we are receiving the proper supports, validations, and reinforcements in spite of chaos that maybe occurring in our home or in our social environment. The Repercussions of Childhood Traumatic Experiences According to clinical research, the odds of developing an addiction or psychological disorder are drastically increased when a child endures trauma or abuse per childhood. In clinical practice, childhood trauma percentages may run close to one hundred percent. Not all addicts were subjected to 6 RELATIONSHIP BETWEEN CHILDHOOD TRAUMA AND ADDICTION By Dr. Asa Don Brown, Ph.D., C.C.C., N.C.C.M. childhood trauma, just as not all severely abused children grow up to be addicts. However, clinical experience has shown that a majority of hardcore injection users were subjected to childhood trauma. Researchers have discovered that trauma experienced in childhood often has profound effects upon the overall development of the individual. Trauma experienced in childhood may be disguised or obscured by a child s own temperament. Childhood traumatic experiences may be obscured or disguised by encouragement of one s peers, the familial environment, academic influences, cultural dynamics, religious mores and ethos, medical and psychological constructs of the individual, and overall social constructs. Apprehension of disclosing traumatic experiences and/or abuse may be manyfold. A child may be apprehensive with disclosing the traumatic experience, out of fear of possible repercussions or rejection. Children may have fears about disclosing traumatic experiences they may be dismissed as false allegations or tales, dependent upon the children s age or intellectual quotient; and they may be sheltered from the parents or caregivers by the children themselves out of fear associated with their traumatic experience. Unfortunately, not all parental caregivers are willing to recognize the probability of dire effects occurring per the child s traumatic experience. Parental caregivers are often inclined to ignore, shelter, or dismiss the childhood accusation, disbelieving facts pertaining to the effect of the trauma, either because of the child s age, intellectual quotient (IQ), and/or as an unconscious or conscious safeguard. Parents may also be dismissive if the traumatic experience occurs by the hands of their spouse, familial relation, close friend, and/or significant community leader (religious, academic, recreational). Predicting Traumatic Experiences A difficulty in predicting childhood traumatic experiences and the outcomes of those experiences; stems from the variation of... severity, frequency, longevity, and duration of the traumatic experience, as well as the temperament of the adult victim of childhood trauma. The variations may be in part due to the child s own temperament, the child s own coping skills, environmental and social conditioning, and the nature of care-giving received during childhood. Moreover, those involved directly and indirectly with the child may be unaware of the effect that the traumatic experiences has had on the life of the child, thus delaying the child s ability to receive much needed care. The attention and immediacy of care is often the key to recovery for any person affected by trauma. THE LINK BETWEEN TRAUMATIC EXPERIENCES AND ADDICTION A person s environment includes many different influences, from family and friends to socioeconomic status and quality of life in general. Factors such as peer pressure, physical and sexual abuse, stress, and quality of parenting can greatly influence the occurrence of drug abuse, escalation to addiction in a person s life. The link between traumatic experiences per childhood and addiction are not always clearly defined, but research has shown a correlation between childhood trauma and addiction. Research has clarified that childhood traumatic experiences can have a profound affect on the psychological, biological and the physiological development of children. Children, who have experienced trauma, have an increased chance of developing physiological and psychological disorders such as: Irritable Bowel Syndrome, IBS; Posttraumatic Stress Disorder, PTSD; Reactive Attachment Disorder, RAD; Mood Disorders; Personality Disorders; and a host of chronic physical and psychological issues. Child maltreatment has been called the tobacco industry of mental health. Much the way smoking directly causes or triggers predispositions for physical disease; early abuse may contribute to virtually all types of mental illness. Addictive Desire Addicts who have been traumatized are seeking to heal themselves, to bring forth pleasure and to feel fulfilled. The pleasure center (also known as the reward circuit) is responsible for engaging and reengaging acts that bring forth pleasure and satisfaction. The primary areas affected by pleasure are: amygdala (emotion regulation); nucleus accumbens (controls the release of dopamine); ventral tegmental area, VTA (technical center of release of dopamine); cerebellum (controls muscle function); and the pituitary gland (the region for releasing beta-endorphins, which is responsible for a reduction in pain); oxytocin (fortifies feelings of trust); and vasopressin (pituitary Continued on page 30

7 Struggling with addiction? CALL US TODAY! Toll Free: Admissions: At the Serenity House Detox we pride ourselves on taking care of our clients like our family. We are a small private medical detox offering a peaceful and compassionate environment. Our clients will have the opportunity to take the first step in the journey to recovery in a safe environment. info@serenityhousedetox.com To Advertise, Call

8 The painful truth: Physicians are not invincible when it comes to drug addiction. Approximately sixteen percent of the medical profession suffers from alcoholism or some form of substance abuse or addiction. Doctors are human just like the rest of society. They are prone to physical illness and emotional distress. If anything, the often unbearable daily stress put on physicians, especially in training, leads to depression and early burnout, which, in turn, leads to the use of alcohol and other chemical substances. Unfortunately, people often believe that medical professionals are superhuman. Unfortunately, they can t leap tall buildings in single bounds, and they shouldn t be expected to do the impossible. Everyone in the medical field deals with the constant, unrelenting stress of dealing with acutely ill patients. Nurses are also prone to the same problems as physicians, sometimes even more so. I was at the top of my career as a respected cardiologist when, suffering from professional burnout after twenty-five years of taking care of acutely ill patients, I discovered medicated bliss through prescription drug samples of Xanax that were constantly being brought to my office. This escape eventually turned my life upsidedown. After losing my medical license and experiencing the death of a friend from an overdose, I finally hit rock bottom. I threw away everything that I had worked hard for, while also alienating myself from my family. Now imagine your worst nightmare the doctor who is to perform your surgery is traveling on the same destructive path during the hours leading up to your operation. Make no mistake, it happens. When you consider that doctors and nurses have very easy access to prescription drug samples, it s not surprising that addiction is an epidemic that is rarely spoken of in medical communities. In As Sick as Our Secrets, perhaps the most candid book ever written about addiction, I take you on a journey...my journey. My recollections of addiction s darkest days are powerful, but the most powerful message of my book is one of hope...of freedom from addiction and the problems that cause it. Addiction to prescription drugs is responsible for more deaths in our country than traffic accidents. Furthermore, half of all adults over eighteen have a friend or family member who is suffering from alcoholism or addiction to illicit or prescription drugs. The numbers are astonishing. According to Sanjay Gupta, MD (CNN), Every 19 minutes, a person dies from prescription drugs. In addition, data from the Center for Disease Control (CDC) confirms that deaths from narcotics have quadrupled over the last decade. The majority of people don t understand that addiction is a complex problem rather than a curse or a moral judgment. It is a disease that affects the majority of us in one way or another. Most of us have an addiction to something, whether it is alcohol, sex, drugs, shopping, eating, gambling, smoking, or a variety of other things. It is an infirmity that cripples us physically, spiritually, and emotionally. The problem may be complicated, but the solutions are simple and straightforward. Craving is a physiological process that involves neurotransmitters in the brain. When a person becomes an addict, they no longer have a choice about whether to pursue their addictions. That person becomes powerless over whatever satisfies their craving. Addiction is also a disease of the mind that involves a lack of proper perception about who we are and how we fit into the world around us. It is a symptom of a spiritual void which we try to fill with what turns out to be an illusion. We try to palliate a pain that is unrelenting and unreachable deep inside of us. The first step in the solution to alcoholism and addiction is to admit that we are powerless over something that has taken control of our lives. I had to reach a point of desperation where I had no choice but to look at myself and my life and ask myself: Do I want to live or do I want to die? Am I sick and tired of being sick and tired? Here I was, a well-respected cardiologist in my community for twenty-five years, reduced to crawling on the floors of dingy hotel rooms looking for 8 FROM PRESCRIPTION DRUG SAMPLES TO ADDICTION: ONE DOCTOR S JOURNEY TO HELL AND BACK - AS SICK AS OUR SECRETS by Steven H. Farber, MD shards of crack cocaine at the age of fifty-five. After all of those years, I had everything, yet I had nothing. I was in the darkest days of my life without a spiritual compass or a relationship with God. All of my material possessions were gone in a heartbeat. I was an absentee father, and when I was present, I was under the influence of drugs that changed my personality radically. I was no longer the understanding father, friend, or doctor. People didn t know who I was, and worst of all, I didn t know who I had become either. I began to lead a Jekyll and Hyde life, hiding my addictions from the world, that is until they caught up with me, which they eventually will. It was as if an alien had come down from another planet and invaded my body. I was a different person. I had changed from being moral and responsible into someone who did things that I knew were wrong, unhealthy, and downright dangerous, not only to myself, but to those I loved. I exposed my own children to dangerous situations. That is the power of addiction. As Sick as Our Secrets is the compelling description of my journey to hell and back. Some readers will see themselves reflected in its pages and identify with my feelings and experiences. This could be your story or the story of a friend or loved one. This book is meant to hit the reader in the gut. It is important to understand the destructive forces of addiction and its deadly impact on our society. Addiction affects millions of people every day, and we must tackle it head-on and not sweep it under the rug until we read about the Michael Jackson s and the Whitney Houston s of this world. Addiction is the voice of desperation. It is a cry for help from millions of people who are being tormented by their demons. There is no end to suffering in the dark shadows of the cave if we isolate ourselves behind veils of secrecy. There are only false promises and the illusion of happiness. Yes, the temptation of darkness and its hidden secrets will always be there. It wages a war within our souls every moment of every day, and we must be vigilant in order to recognize its presence and resist its destructive nature. We should live as if every moment is our chance for happiness, while recognizing that every speck of time is precious, and life is short. My recovery has enabled me to take responsibility for my actions and has given me the opportunity to learn from my mistakes. My past has been a blessing because it allows me to see that isolation is not the answer to my pain and suffering and that I no longer have to fight the terrible battle against addiction by myself. You see, all of us need the help of others who are struggling and they need our help as well. The battle against addiction can be fought only one day at a time and one moment at a time. -Excerpt from As Sick as our Secrets Read as Sick as our Secrets if you want to discover the solution to the epidemic that is destroying our society. Miracles happen every day around us and within us. We just have to learn how to change our perceptions, not only of ourselves, but of everything around us. In the process, we learn how to escape our darkest hours and find the light of love and forgiveness. Steven H. Farber, MD, received his medical degree from Hahnemann Medical College and Hospital. He completed an internal medicine residency program and cardiology fellowship at the Baylor College of Medicine in Houston, Texas. He founded a non-profit organization called HEART of Montgomery County to improve access to affordable healthcare for the community s indigent and uninsured population. In 2003, Dr. Farber published Behind the White Coat, a personal memoir, and then co-authored Stepping Stones to Success with Deepak Chopra and Jack Canfield in As Sick As Our Secrets is available at and

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10 HOW TO ENJOY THE HOLIDAYS WHEN YOU OR YOUR LOVED ONE HAS AN ADDICTION By Candace Plattor M.A, R.C.C Another year has gone by and The Holidays are fast approaching although if you re anything like me, you re still wondering where September went! The time has come when we are once again seeing commercials on TV and in magazines about how wonderful the Christmas season is, that it is better to give than to receive, and how warm and loving families are, especially at this time of year. But the reality is that, for many of people, this is not a time of peace and joy... However, because there is so much shame associated with not having positive holiday times, most people don t talk openly about how difficult this time of year can be for them. This can lead to intense feelings of loneliness, disappointment, and even shame. And when any form of addiction is thrown into the mix, this season of the year can be anything but jolly. If you can relate to any of the following, then this article may give you some helpful tips for getting through the holidays. 1. IF YOU ARE STILL IN ACTIVE ADDICTION If you are still using your addictive behavior of choice, I want to congratulate you for reading this article, because it likely means that you are getting closer to reaching out for some help. Please know that all of us who have been in the throes of addiction have felt the same shame, guilt, hopelessness and despair that you are feeling right now. Every year, thousands of people all over the world are able to stop engaging in their addiction and you can be one of them! At this time of year, instead of spending time with your family, it may be wiser for you to sign yourself into a detox or a treatment center, or to call a professional Addictions Counselor. Although this may feel lonely, it may be easier than facing those same arguments and disappointments that you and your loved ones have experienced during past holidays. Attending a support group such as Alcoholics Anonymous or Narcotics Anonymous truly understand you because they, too, have been where you are now. If you are unsure of what to do, you might want to seek help from a trained professional to explore options and to make the best decision for yourself. 2. IF YOU ARE IN EARLY RECOVERY I generally consider early recovery as anywhere between having one day to one year of not engaging in your addictive behavior of choice. If you are in early recovery and involved in one of the popular self-help groups, there may be alternatives to going home for the holidays. These can include potluck dinners, dances, and other social activities, as well as extra meetings that have been scheduled for this time of year. If you re involved in one of these groups online, there are often chats and meetings that you can join to discuss your feelings, where you can give and receive some extra support. If you are not involved in a recovery program, spending time with friends who understand where you currently are in your life can be a wise alternative. These friends can provide loving support without the emotional triggers that often accompany your visits home. If you do decide to spend the holiday with family who live out of town, it is a good idea to have some support lined up for yourself. For example, before you leave, check out whether there are 12-Step or 16-Step meetings where you will be. You can also explore the online availability of these programs, either as your primary source of support or as backup. In addition, you can line up some people to support you where you currently live. Keep in touch with your friends, if they are either non-users or in recovery themselves. If you have a sponsor, checking in with that person daily, either by phone or online, would be a good idea. If your counselor or therapist offers phone counseling, book an appointment or two for the time you will be away. There are also Crisis Centers in most urban areas that you can call. Some are open 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, while others have more limited hours of operation. Finding out when they are open and how to reach them is another wonderful way to be proactive and take care of yourself while you are away. 3. IF YOU ARE A LOVED ONE OF SOMEONE WITH AN ADDICTIVE BEHAVIOR If you are a loved one struggling with a family member s addiction, you may find yourself tempted to over-function in order to reduce your anxieties and to make certain that everything goes well. But having an addicted person at your gatherings can make everything much more difficult. 10 Don t be afraid to openly address your loved one s addiction BEFORE the family get-together. Otherwise, you may find yourself with an elephant in the living room that nobody acknowledges, and you will feel as if you have to walk on eggshells and continue your accommodating behaviors just to keep things under control. For example, when dealing with family members who are alcoholic, you could let them know beforehand that you would love to have them there, as long as they understand that the expectation is that they will remain sober. If they choose to drink after being informed of this boundary, inform them that you will be asking them to leave. If your loved one does not agree to this boundary beforehand, then it is best not to invite him or her to the gathering. Openly discussing these options with other family members and having their support when setting these boundaries can be crucial for the success of the gathering. Let them know your thoughts and feelings, and the specific help you need, whenever possible. Please know that learning how to set these kinds of boundaries takes time and practice, but you can definitely do it! If you feel that you need help with this, get in touch with a professional counselor or therapist who can assist you. Many therapists work during the holiday season because they know that their clients need them at this time. I hope these suggestions will help you have a happier holiday season than you may have had in the past. Deciding on whether to spend time with family over the holidays is not an easy decision. Remember to do the things that will help you achieve and maintain greater self-respect, and to let that be your guide during a potentially emotionally perilous time. Candace Plattor graduated from the Adler School of Professional Psychology with a Masters degree (M.A.) in Counseling Psychology. Candace s award winning books Loving an Addict, Loving Yourself: The Top 10 Survival Tips for Loving Someone with an Addiction and Loving an Addict, Loving Yourself: The Workbooks are available in bookstores throughout Canada and the US. Please visit her website for more information: YOUR JOURNEY BEGINS HERE... MEDICATION ASSISTED RECOVERY STRUCTURED, SUPPORTIVE COMMUNITY C O M F O R T A B L E, S I N G L E O C C U P A N C Y U N I T S STEPS TO THE OCEAN AND DOWNTOWN DELRAY BEACH DELRAY BEACH, FL

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12 ALCOHOL- THE EFFECT ON MIND, BODY & SPIRIT By Dr. Michael J De Vito Marley was dead, to begin with. There is no doubt whatever about that....old Marley was as dead as a doornail. These few words start the opening scene of one of the most recognized classics of the holiday season, A Christmas Carol, by Charles Dickens. This timeless short story has become a part of our December traditions and memories, along with Menorahs, Christmas lights, shopping, family gatherings, and year end celebrations. It is that time of year again, a time of joy and festivities for many, yet unfortunately a time of bad decisions, wrong turns and heart-ache for others. For that latter group alcohol is all too often the focus of predicable negative outcomes. Alcohol use and production has been an integral part of our human history, festivities and culture since recorded time. It remains part of our culture today. Every individual from adolescence on has a point of view regarding alcohol use. In other words we all have a relationship in some way with alcohol. That relationship can range full spectrum, from abstinence and intolerance, to acceptance and regular use, with all colors in between. That is part of our philosophy of life, our world view, how the mind perceives the use and abuse of alcohol. That world view is shaped daily by our culture, our social circle, our media indoctrination and our personal interactions. These factors create the collective consciousness of our human experience. All of our perceptions, thoughts, emotions, memories, beliefs and imaginations create our philosophy of life, The Mind, which includes our point of view regarding the use of alcohol. The Mind can be controlled by our past, can affect our present, and can dictate our future. It is what leads the abuser and the alcoholic to be in denial, to justify use, to blame others, to live a life of deception, and to become more and more isolated over time. The Mind allows loved ones to be enablers. It permits them to willfully be distracted and minimize the truth of what is happening right before their eyes. It is the Mind that helps a child seek out a way to cope and survive in a surrounding family storm. Everyone has a relationship with alcohol. Our Mind and the minds of those we are teaching need to be nurtured and protected, not abused and polluted. Benjamin Franklin was quoted as saying, A house is not a home unless it contains food and fire for the Mind as well as the Body. Alcohol affects the Mind of everyone who uses it or is affected by it. Alcohol is a simple compound, a by-product of the breakdown of simple sugars. And yet this simple two carbon molecule is physiologically perceived by the body, to be a poison. Additionally, highly toxic byproducts of the enzymatic breakdown of alcohol such as acetaldehyde are recognized as poisons also and must quickly be broken down further into harmless molecules to be excreted from the body. In some individuals with one of the genetic predispositions for alcoholism other by products such as THIQ are inadvertently produced. These unintended by-products increase the affinity for and the reactions of alcohol abuse. In the normally functioning individual toxic by-products, with the exception of THIQ, are broken down and eliminated by the liver, kidneys, lungs, digestive tract and skin As use, age and time go by the body functions less optimally and the effects of these toxins begin to take a toll. College students seem to bounce back in time for Monday morning classes. They have youth, health and less years of abuse in their favor, at least for a while. The greater the frequency or volume of alcohol use the greater this toxicity begins to overtake the target organs of the body. This social and often anti-social activity begins to take a toll on the brain, liver, heart, kidneys, esophagus, stomach, and other vital organs and systems. Alcohol affects the brain. If we are a user socially or habitually of alcohol that is one of the reasons we left our abstinent relationship and continued with use. We liked the effect alcohol has on the brain. We liked the relaxation, the reduction of inhibition and the emotional change to a feeling of well-being, all of which are short lived. Other less desirable effects include slowed reactions, false confidence, bravado, slurred speech, short and long term memory loss, poor judgment, physical sickness and numerous other cognitive and physical impairments. We tend to remember the initial happy effects and forget the latter negative consequences. Each use has a lasting effect in the brain. Over time these effects become more obvious. Long term memory loss, brain chemistry deficiencies, lack of wellbeing, altered sleep patterns, separation from reality, psychotic events and much more physical destruction with predictable outcomes. The brain perceives alcohol as a poison. Alcohol affects the liver. The liver has multiple functions in maintaining healthy homeostasis and physiology. It is the body s filtration system, energy 12 reservoir, participant in normal digestion and numerous other vital activities. The introduction of alcohol and habitual use gives the liver an additional job, the detoxification of the toxic effects of alcohol on the body. Over time this begins to overwhelm the normal function of the liver and begins to destroy normal liver cells resulting in liver enlargement, fatty tissue and ultimate scarring of once normal liver cells, Cirrhosis. Liver enzymes become physiologically unbalanced leading to less efficiency in normal liver function and potential shutdown. The liver perceives alcohol as a poison. Other common health conditions treated daily in our family physicians office that could naturally be eliminated or controlled by abstaining from alcohol are high blood pressure, erectile dysfunction, depression, anxiety, sleep disorders, upper and lower digestive problems, accidental injuries, (in and out of the home), Type 2 Diabetes, obesity and other numerous lifestyle conditions. How much better off would we be if we did not take the pharmaceuticals prescribed to treat these conditions in the first place? Alcohol affects the Body in a negative way. And now a gentle warning to any of the Secular Humanists who may have read this far, I am going to talk about the Spiritual aspect of alcohol use. Yes, I may even mention God. Please discontinue reading now. I don t want this article to be the cause of any insomnia, anxieties or indigestion you may experience over your version of the Holidays. Let me be clear that I do not believe that for the non-abuser or non-alcoholic that the occasional social use of alcohol, the glass of wine with dinner, a beer with friends, or a toast at our daughter s wedding is going to separate us from our spirituality, our health, or the personal connection we have with God. However, I do believe that the greater our willingness to tolerate alcohol use, the greater our devices to protect our drinking habits, the greater the risk becomes for negative consequences. That brings us back to The Mind and Body connection. Therefore, I believe the safer and wiser decision is the abstinence from alcohol to better protect a healthy Mind, Body and Spirit. When the negative consequences of alcohol use begin, such as family dysfunction, academic and career disruptions, repetitive DUI s, aggressive disruptive behaviors, isolation, constant lies and broken promises, the perception of who we are begins to change. That perception of ourselves that we develop over time is not a positive one. Self-confidence and selfesteem are lost or badly damaged. No personal connection has value or meaning. That includes any personal connection we may have had with God. That separation from ourselves, others, and God is spawned and maintained by us. We are sentient human beings with a spirit. We yearn for connection. However, as we progress in addiction we feel less and less worthy of acceptance. By our own self condemnation through the guilt and shame of our past actions we reject not only our physical connections; we reject our spiritual connections as well. We become our own source of isolation, and that isolation is harmful. Self-condemnation is overcome through the spiritual reconnection with God. Alcohol affects us spiritually. The hallmark of all addictive and compulsive behavior including alcohol abuse and addiction is denial. Denial is that bolted door that every therapist, counselor, family member and physician must get past if we are going to have a chance of intervening and helping to change lives for the better. The recognition of past and present events and the visions of the future outcomes must be seen and understood. That does not dramatically come when the last stroke of twelve has ceased to vibrate accompanied by ghostly apparitions. But it must be just as eye opening and profound for us to overcome denial and seek a new direction. As Ebenezer learned in the end of that Christmas classic we all have the capacity and strength to change. Recovery is real and always available. Our past may be written but we still have pen in hand to write the new script for our present and future. Have a Happy Hanukkah, a Merry Christmas and a Healthy New Year. Dr. Michael J. De Vito is a diplomate and is board certified in Addictionology. He has over 30 years of experience in successfully guiding patients and clients on the path of Recovery Consciousness. He is the founder and program director of NewStart Treatment Center located in Henderson, Nevada. NewStart Treatment Center utilizes a drug free and natural approach to addiction treatment. Dr. De Vito is the author of Addiction: The Master Keys to Recovery

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14 THE DANGERS OF LAUNCHING WHILE INTOXICATED- LWI AND ARRESTED DEVELOPMENT The stresses of helping to guide and facilitate our adolescent and young adult children s journey to economic and emotional self-sufficiency are greatly compounded by misuse of both legal and illegal mind altering substances, as well as misappropriation of prescription medications. Alcoholism, substance abuse, and chemical dependence can be devastating to the individual and the family. Alcoholism is a systemic process that requires a systemic solution. Alcoholism and chemical addictions affect the psychology of entire families. While waiting for sobriety many families fall apart. Family therapy helps initiate change even when the alcoholic denies the problem and is unwilling to seek help. Engaging the entire family has multiple benefits in multiple domains including treatment outcomes, patient recovery, family recovery, long-term maintenance of sobriety and prevention of alcoholism in other family members. The relational traumas of chemical dependence include: A chaotic, unpredictable, and often unsafe home environment Marital discord, infidelity, separation and divorce Child, parental, and spousal abuse and/or neglect Inappropriate hypersexuality and incest Cutoffs and estrangement Disruption of family life cycle stages Bowen Family Systems Therapy treats the individual with a chemical dependence as part of a family unit that has a multigenerational history that led to addictive behavior. Intergenerational patterns of power, loss and control ( overfunctioning or overresponsibility ), transmit poisonous attitudes from parent to child. If left unresolved, these problems often remain, even after sustained sobriety. Recovery from alcoholism and substance abuse involves healing the emotional relationships of all members of the family. One of the paramount concerns for sober family members is being recognized as individuals in need of assistance. Family members must first learn to cope with their own problems before any beneficial effects can reach the individual with chemical dependence. Reducing the negative impact of chemical dependence is protective of future generations. The advantages of family involvement include: Providing Cohesiveness and Support Undermining Denial Addressing cognitive distortions Promoting abstinence and adherence to the treatment plan Relapse Prevention Twelve step programs (AA, Al-Anon & Ala-Teen) are critically important parts of treatment for individuals with chemical dependence and their families. During the crucial first year of sobriety, the family s tasks include learning new behavioral skills for coping with stress and conflict in order to adjust to a change in lifestyle that supports both abstinence and a stable family system, thereby developing healthy interdependence and family reorganization. In their landmark book, The Responsibility Trap: A Blueprint for Treating the Alcoholic Family, Claudia Bepko and Jo Ann Krestan introduced three key constructs central to the understanding and treatment of addiction in family systems: (1) over- and under responsibility; (2) pride, shame, and power; and (3) the role of alcohol as a mediator of gender role construction. They also define the co-alcoholic as the overresponsible and overfunctioning non-drinking family member, be it parent, child or spouse, who is as nonresponsible as the underesponsible alcoholic. Both the non-drinking person and the one drinking alcoholically share a complementary process of abdicating responsibility for self. Bepko and Krestan further delineate three stages in the family recovery process: (1) attainment of sobriety, (2) adjustment to sobriety (3) long-term maintenance of sobriety. It is vital to prepare the family for the crises of sobriety which engenders bitterness, resentment, fear, rage and a sense of unjust demotion in the coalcoholic. This necessitates a re-organization of the family in order to establish healthy relationships, address other family issues, and help achieve desired level of intimacy. The adjustment to a more functional lifestyle that supports both abstinence and a stable family system requires family members to break out of the responsibility trap and adapt to new roles. Children are molded by the alcoholic family to be over-responsible (calm, efficient but lonely and filled with self doubt) or under-responsible (filled with rage, demanding constant care and praise, but filled with violent resentment towards anyone that helps them). Conversely over- and under-functioning in families and relationships provides a welcome mat into people s homes for alcohol and addictive chemicals. Therapeutic interventions are aimed at 14 By Ronald B Cohen,MD modifying ineffective and inefficient family patterns in which symptomatic behavior is embedded. The goal is to solve problems in current relationships so as not to leave a damaging legacy for the next generation. In their delineation of the six stages of the family life cycle, Betty Carter and Monica McGoldrick begin with a focus on the individual young adult. This Family Life Cycle transition, Becoming an Adult: Leaving Home and Staying Connected, begins with the adolescent s struggle for identity and independence, and continues with the development of autonomy, healthy emotional interdependence, and self-differentiation during young adulthood. Developmental tasks include differentiation of self in relationship to the family one grew up in, development of intimate peer relationships, and establishment of financial responsibility and independence. Ideally one can stay meaningfully connected to significant others yet remain autonomous in one s own emotional functioning. Seen from the larger systemic family perspective of parenting adolescents and launching young adult children, key developmental changes in family structure, process and function include increased flexibility of family boundaries, expansion of the empathic envelope, and shifts of relationships from parentchild to co-equal adults. Taken together, the sum total is that Launching is a relational task, children have to launch and parents have to launch them. A young adult s tasks in this launching phase transition are primarily focused on the development of autonomy and healthy emotional interdependence. The parents tasks begin with facilitating the transition from the parent-child relationship to a more co-equal adult-to-adult relationship. In addition, parents must attend to other midlife developmental tasks including becoming a couple again and resolving issues with their parents, caring giving and adapting to their death. Family members often fail one another in important and painful ways during this life cycle stage, yet they remain family forever and must find their way forward together. Failure to launch results in both fusion and enmeshment, wherein the young adult does not leave home, or distance, cut offs and estrangement, where contact is kept to a minimum or not at all. Either way the members of the family remain highly reactive to each other, tied up in not being free to develop and grow. Substance abuse and chemical dependence can have a devastating effect on the individual and the family during these life-cycle transitions. Family therapy can help families become aware of their own needs and aid in the goal of keeping substance abuse from moving from one generation to another. Family conflicts, low family support, drug use among other family members and parenting stress have all been shown to contribute to relapse. The goals of Family Therapy in the treatment of Chemical Dependence include: (1) Utilize the support and leverage of the family to reduce the individual s drug use and implement other important lifestyle changes (2) Alter problematic aspects of the family environment to maintain positive changes in the individual and other family members and promote long-term recovery. Ultimately we are all responsible for our own emotional well-being. In the alcoholic family, as in all families, one is powerless over anyone else. Coercion, blaming and distancing are rarely productive. Rather work to promote a consideration of reasons for change, increase awareness of discrepancies and negative consequences of not changing behavior, and increase sense of self-efficacy. While the alcoholic is solely responsible for his/her sobriety, family behaviors can maintain an environment in which the task is much harder to achieve. However, change yourself and you change the relationship. Change the relationship and you give others in the system the best opportunity to do their own self-differentiation work. Family Systems Coaching or family therapy with one person focuses on understanding the rules and roles of one s family of origin and developing the freedom to make one s own decisions. The goal is self-differentiation, the process of changing one s part in old, repetitive, dysfunctional emotional patterns so that one is able to speak one s personal views calmly and nonreactively regardless of who is for or against them. What distinguishes Bowen Family Systems Coaching for Individuals is Working with individuals to solve their problems with their families The goal of Family Systems Coaching is to help individuals proactively define themselves in relationship to others in their families without emotionally cutting off or giving in. The process of change is built upon ownership of one s emotional reactions to old triggers and interactions. Family Systems Coaching offers individuals a process for making change in their relationships even without the participation of other family members. It is family therapy from the individual s point of view. Continued on page 24