discuss alcohol A Resource for Parents & Mentors to Talk to Teens About Alcohol Prom & Graduation 1
talks on alcohol how to protect a young life during prom and graduation Toward the end of senior year of high school, prom planning begins, schoolwork decreases and tension eases. Alcohol is often part of the festivities. During the months around prom and graduation, a disproportionate number of adolescents are involved in traffic accidents, some of them fatal. Monthly motor-vehicle crash data from the National Highway Traffic Safety Administration takes a grim turn each spring. Accidents begin to rise each May and June and peak in late summer. Teen drinking has hit historic lows in recent years but remains surprisingly common among adolescents. In a large national survey, 70 percent of 12th graders said they d had at least one drink, 51 percent admitted they had been drunk and 22 percent had binged had four or five drinks in a row in the past two weeks. The most disturbing stat: Roughly one in five high school boys and one in ten girls had driven a car or other vehicle after drinking within the past month. There s good news, though: You can help solve the problem. Researchers who ve studied drinking patterns among teens say parents and other adults can reduce or eliminate alcohol use during prom and graduation. It takes work. It means talking to teens about alcohol and a bit more involved than your teen might like during prom and graduation season. But you have the power to prevent a teen from becoming a tragic statistic. 2
being a cool parent who lets a teen drink doesn t work Some people are surprised to learn that simply expecting your kids to abstain from drinking can make a critical difference in whether or not they do. Two researchers writing in the Journal of Adolescent Health in 2005 said they discovered that teens whose parents expected them not to drink did indeed drink less, were better prepared to say no to risky behavior and were better able to resist peer pressure. Meanwhile, researchers writing in the journal Addiction in 2007 reported that teens whose families made alcohol available to them drank more during adolescence. So if you think that by giving your high schooler permission to have a beer or a glass of wine at home you re helping dissuade him or her from drinking when you re not around, you re probably wrong. neither does just taking away the car keys Keeping a teen from drinking and driving is only half the battle. Drinking has many other unwanted and serious consequences. It lowers inhibitions and inflames passions. For teens, who are already uninhibited and passionate, that can lead to saying and doing things they regret, foolish stunts, vandalism, regrettable sexual experiences, date rape and fights that can result in serious injury or death. even minor drunk-driving events can irrevocably alter lives You may regard a teen drunk-driving accident where nobody gets hurt as a lucky break. But even minor accidents can have long-lasting effects. Many states have zero-tolerance laws for underage drinking and driving, meaning a teenager who drinks even one beer within an hour of Don t make assumptions getting behind the wheel may have when it comes to drinking a blood-alcohol concentration and driving. above the legal limit for his age. Teens caught drinking and driving can have their license suspended or revoked until age 21 in some jurisdictions. And the mark on their record remains for years, making it that much harder to get a job. 3
letting grads drink under your roof is seriously risky Some parents believe the best solution is to roll out the crepe paper, buy the kids a keg, and host the party at home, letting the guests stay overnight. But even in controlled settings, underage drinking is hazardous, and there are often unintended consequences. Many parents don t realize that if alcohol is offered to underage drinkers on their property or while teens are under their supervision, they can be held liable and sued for injuries or accidents. If an underage person gets into a fight, gets hurt, hurts others or is involved in a sexual assault while on their property, especially if alcohol was obtained there, parents may also be held responsible. In many jurisdictions, an adult doesn t even have to be present to be held criminally liable if an accident or other bad event occurs as the result of alcohol being served at their house or at a location for which they have assumed responsibility. have an adult conversation with your emerging adult The graduate you care about may roll his or her eyes at your advice. But studies show that teenagers who engage in conversation with parents and significant adult role models are more resilient and better able to resist risky or unsafe behaviors. Even if they already know you consider drinking unacceptable, or even if they don t seem outwardly ready to heed adult advice, Communicate start talk to them about how the conversation. to make smart decisions. Some grads may prompt a talk with a question. If they don t, initiate the talk yourself and more than once. The best evidence says these conversations need to be repeated. Be patient and don t be alarmed if you encounter some resistance. It s also crucial have facts on hand, to make your points stick. 4
be a killjoy and save a life Aim for an alcohol-free prom and graduation. The trick is to make drinking too much trouble and being perfectly sober a lot of fun: Know where your child plans to go and with whom. Discuss the possibility that alcohol will be present, and emphasize that drinking is illegal at this age, that alcohol abuse is dangerous and that drinking is unacceptable to you. Work with the school, or other parents in your community, to plan an exciting alcohol-free graduation party or post-prom event. Host a dinner or invite your child s friends over for a nonalcoholic preprom celebration and picture-taking session. Know where the alcohol is in your house, and how much you have, so that you are not unwittingly making it accessible to underage drinkers. Rent your child a limousine and have the limo company ban alcohol in the car. If your teen or their friends drive, set up a no-questions-asked backup plan in case somebody decides to drink after all. references Nash S.G., McQueen A., Bray J.H. Pathways to adolescent alcohol use: family environment, peer influences, and parental expectations. J Adolesc Health 2005; 37:19-28. Komro KA, Maldonado-Molina MM, Mildred M et al. Effects of home access and availability of alcohol on young adolescents alcohol use. Addiction 2007: 102 (10): 1597-1608. Johnston, L. D., O Malley, P. M., Bachman, J. G., & Schulenberg, J. E. (December 14, 2011). Marijuana use continues to rise among U.S. teens, while alcohol use hits historic lows. University of Michigan News Service: Ann Arbor, MI. Retrieved 1/12/2012 from http://www. monitoringthefuture.org Centers for Disease Control and Prevention Youth Risk Behavioral Surveillance- United States 2009, MMWR 2010. Retrieved 1/12/2012 from http://www.cdc.gov/healthyyouth/yrbs/index.htm Wagenaar AC. Minimum drinking age and alcohol availability to youth; issues and research needs. In Hilton ME, Bloss G, eds. Alcohol and Health Monograph: Economics and the Prevention of Alcohol-Related Problems, Rockville, MD: National Institute on Alcohol Abuse and Alcoholism; 1993:175-200. NIH Publication 93-3513. Fatal crashes and crash rates by month-state: USA, year 2009. Fatality Analysis Reporting System Encyclopedia. Retrieved 1/12/2012 from: http://www-fars.nhtsa.dot.gov/crashes/crashestime.aspx 5
10 Tips For Parents During Prom & Graduation Season Talking to teens about drinking can sometimes be challenging, but it is worth it when it comes to safety. Parents start listening to and talking with your teen. 1. communicate start the conversation Before the festivities start, discuss your concerns. Ascertain where your child plans to go, and with whom. Discuss the likelihood that alcohol will be present and your concerns about it. 2. be aware that alcohol is often easy to access Reports show that teens feel they can access alcohol more readily as they approach their senior year. Don t become their point of access. Know how much alcohol you have in the house and where you keep it. 3. discuss peer pressure / influence Talk about how good friends look out for each other. Yes, it can be embarrassing for them, but emphasize how important it is to call for help if a friend is in trouble. 4. host a party to keep control in your own backyard But remember it s a myth that providing alcohol to teens at home at home is safer. Offer food if kids do find a way to drink later, they at least won t be drinking on an empty stomach. 5. don t make assumptions when it comes to drinking and driving Remind them of the zero tolerance law it s illegal for anyone under 21 to drive with any alcohol in their bloodstream. That means no more drivers license! Remind them never to ride with others who have been drinking. 6. check in with the limousine company If your child will be chipping in on a limo rental, check with the limo company to make sure there is a policy for underage riders drinking in their cars. 7. have a safety plan Make sure your teen has alternatives to driving no matter what; you can even discuss a code word to be be used in regular conversation to get a teen out of a tough situation. Make a plan in case they re stuck in an unsafe situation. Offer to pick them up any time, no questions asked. 8. think about the future Remind your kids that pictures on the Internet will be seen, and not just by you. Tell them not to be shortsighted enough to be tagged doing anything dicey. Bad decisions at key moments can influence the future. Being seen in the wrong scenario or getting arrested affects the college applications and job interviews. 9. if a teen comes home drunk consider the emergency room Hopefully, you will not get to this point, but if your teen passes out and cannot be woken up, don t risk having him or her just sleep it off contact the ER and let an expert can make the call. It s safer to deal with the hassle than the consequences of a bad decision. 10. take advantage of the morning after to have a conversation The next day, ask your child about his/her experience. Was it fun? Did anything make them uncomfortable? Did anyone get into trouble? Use this opportunity to learn more about your child s life. 6
author Karen Soren, MD Associate Professor of Pediatrics and Public Health Columbia University Medical Center Director of Adolescent Medicine NewYork-Presbyterian Morgan Stanley Children s Hospital 7