Reflecting on Your Spirituality Bill Miller St. Andrew Presbyterian Church

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1 Reflecting on Your Spirituality Bill Miller St. Andrew Presbyterian Church Spirituality is not something that you have or lack: there are not spiritual and unspiritual people. Neither, I think, are there levels of spirituality, with some people being more spiritual than others. Rather one s spirituality involves a complex set of dimensions or characteristics, much like one s personality. Here are some examples of such dimensions: Spiritual beliefs such as the existence and nature of God, materialism, fundamentalism Spiritual experiences such as mystical experience, revelation, awe Spiritual practices such as meditation, prayer, service to others, fasting, study of scripture Organizational Religiousness extent of involvement/participation in religious groups Sense of meaning and purpose in life, personal peace, trust, forgiveness Core values that guide choices and action Spiritual/religious coping From this perspective, everyone is located somewhere along these dimensions, and therefore has a place within this multidimensional space of spirituality. We also move around along these dimensions over time. For example, on just these two dimensions an individual could appear anywhere: Belief in God Certainty None Very low Very high Sense of Meaning and Purpose in Life Spiritual Questions Isn t it curious that even in a church, so many of us seldom talk about our own spirituality? What might you say if discussing one of these questions? Where have you been, where are you now, and where are you headed on your spiritual journey? How would you describe your current relationship with God? What gives your life meaning and purpose? When do you feel closest to God? What feeds you spiritually? What do you hunger for? Why do you go to church? What do you find particularly meaningful there? What do you need spiritually? What seems to be missing? What is going well in your spiritual life? What is going less well? If you decided to devote more time and attention to your spiritual life, what could you do? In what ways would you like to develop and grow spiritually? What might be a next step? What do you think God wants from you (if anything)? What might God be calling you to do? What do you want or need from God? How could your heart be more aligned with the heart of God? In what ways are you living out your faith? What do you experience in prayer? 1

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3 My Core Values From the 100 values listed below, circle or underline no more than ten that you would say are the most central and important values that guide your life. (It s OK to have fewer than ten.) ACCEPTANCE ACCURACY ACHIEVEMENT ADVENTURE ART ATTRACTIVENESS AUTHORITY AUTONOMY BEAUTY BELONGING CARING CHALLENGE COMFORT COMMITMENT COMPASSION COMPLEITY COMPROMISE CONTRIBUTION COOPERATION COURAGE COURTESY CREATIVITY CURIOSITY DEPENDABILITY DILIGENCE DUTY ECOLOGY ECITEMENT FAITHFULNESS FAME FAMILY FITNESS FLEIBILITY FORGIVENESS FREEDOM FRIENDSHIP FUN GENEROSITY GENUINENESS GOD S WIL GRATITUDE GROWTH HEALTH HONESTY HOPE HUMILITY HUMOR IMAGINATION INDEPENDENCE INDUSTRY INNER PEACE INTEGRITY INTELLIGENCE INTIMACY JUSTICE KNOWLEDGE LEADERSHIP LEISURE LOVED LOVING to be accepted as I am to be correct in my opinions and beliefs to have important accomplishments to have new and exciting experiences to appreciate or express myself in art to be physically attractive to be in charge of others to be self-determined and independent to appreciate beauty around me to have a sense of belonging, being part of to take care of others to take on difficult tasks and problems to have a pleasant and comfortable life to make enduring, meaningful commitments to feel and act on concern for others to embrace the intricacies of life to be willing to give and take in reaching agreements to make a lasting contribution in the world to work collaboratively with others to be brave and strong in the face of adversity to be considerate and polite toward others to create new things or ideas to seek out, experience and learn new things to be reliable and trustworthy to be thorough and conscientious in whatever I do to carry out my duties and obligations to live in harmony with the environment to have a life full of thrills and stimulation to be loyal and true in relationships to be known and recognized to have a happy, loving family to be physically fit and strong to adjust to new circumstances easily to be forgiving of others to be free from undue restrictions and limitations to have close, supportive friends to play and have fun to give what I have to others to act in a manner that is true to who I am to seek and obey the will of God to be thankful and appreciative to keep changing and growing to be physically well and healthy to be honest and truthful to maintain a positive and optimistic outlook to be modest and unassuming to see the humorous side of myself and the world to have dreams and see possibilities to be free from depending on others to work hard and well at my life tasks to experience personal peace to live my daily life in a way that is consistent with my values to keep my mind sharp and active to share my innermost experiences with others to promote fair and equal treatment for all to learn and contribute valuable knowledge to inspire and guide others to take time to relax and enjoy to be loved by those close to me to give love to others 3

4 MASTERY MINDFULNESS MODERATION MONOGAMY MUSIC NON-CONFORMITY NOVELTY NURTURANCE OPENNESS ORDER PASSION PATRIOTISM PLEASURE POPULARITY POWER PRACTICALITY PROTECT PROVIDE PURPOSE RATIONALITY REALISM RESPONSIBILITY RISK ROMANCE SAFETY SELF-ACCEPTANCE SELF-CONTROL SELF-ESTEEM SELF-KNOWLEDGE SERVICE SEUALITY SIMPLICITY SOLITUDE SPIRITUALITY STABILITY TOLERANCE TRADITION VIRTUE WEALTH WORLD PEACE to be competent in my everyday activities to live conscious and mindful of the present moment to avoid excesses and find a middle ground to have one close, loving relationship to enjoy or express myself in music to question and challenge authority and norms to have a life full of change and variety to encourage and support others to be open to new experiences, ideas and options to have a life that is well-ordered and organized to have deep feelings about ideas, activities or people to love, serve and protect my country to feel good to be well-liked by many people to have control over others to focus on what is practical, prudent, and sensible to protect and keep safe those I love to provide for and take care of my family to have meaning and direction in my life to be guided by reason, logic and evidence to see and act realistically and practically to make and carry out responsible decisions to take risks and chances to have intense, exciting love in my life to be safe and secure to accept myself as I am to be disciplined in my own actions to feel good about myself to have a deep and honest understanding of myself to be helpful and of service to others to have an active and satisfying sex life to live life simply, with minimal needs to have time and space where I can be apart from others to grow and mature spiritually to have a life that stays fairly consistent to accept and respect those who differ from me to follow respected patterns of the past to live a morally pure and excellent life to have plenty of money. to work to promote peace in the world Reflect Now from the values that you have marked above, identify the five that you choose as your most important, central, non-negotiable values by which your life is guided. List them here. Feel free to substitute other values that were not listed above. #1 #2 #3 #4 #5 How are these values reflected in your life: in what you do, how you spend your time and resources? What are you doing or not doing that prevents you from more fully living these values? 4

5 My Personal Mission Statement Various writers including Alan Lakein and Stephen Covey have suggested that individuals (as well as groups and companies) should ponder and create their own personal statement of mission or purpose. Completing the values exercise above may help you in clarifying what matters most to you in life the values that call and inspire and motivate you. Your mission statement might represent your particular talents, the values that you want your life to reflect, or outcomes that you hope to achieve. Though it can be longer, a personal mission statement is usually a single line, one that you can easily remember. Some people start their days by reflecting on their own statement of purpose, or examine at the end of each day how their life reflected their mission statement. It is also normal for one s mission statement to change and evolve at different eras of life. In creating your own statement consider what your mission or purpose is at this point in your life. Here are some examples of real-life personal mission statements from well-known people To have fun in my journey through life and to learn from my mistakes. To be a teacher and to be known for inspiring my students to be more than they thought they could be. To love God and love others. To live a balanced life, and apply ethical principles to make a significant difference. To cultivate the self-worth and net-worth of women around the world. To leave the world a better place than I found it, for horses and for people. One way to get your statement started is with the words: The purpose of my life is or My mission in life is. It may also help to jot down some key words or ideas that ought to be included and then craft them into a personal mission statement: Now write it out: My Mission Statement (at this point in my life) is Date Signature (if you wish) 5

6 My Concept of God What do you believeaboutgod? Within each of the boxes below, underline at least two statements that describe your own current understanding of God. If you wish, you can also cross out statements that definitely do not describe how you understand God. There are no right or wrong answers here only your current experience. It s also OK if some of your choices seem to conflict with others. That s fairly common. God does not answer when I call. God doesn t feel very personal to me. I get no feeling of closeness to God, even in prayer. God feels distant to me. I rarely feel that God is with me. God never reaches out to me. I can feel God deep inside of me. I can talk to God on an intimate basis. God nurtures me. God is always there for me. I sometimes feel cradled in God s arms. I feel warm inside when I pray. I think God takes pleasure in my achievements. God keeps asking me to try harder. God wants me to achieve all I can in life. God asks me to keep growing as a person. I think human achievements are a delight to God. God encourages me to go forward on the journey of life. God never challenges me. Thinking too much could endanger my faith. God doesn t want me to ask too many questions. God has never asked me to do hard things. God doesn t mind if I don t grow very much. Being close to God and being active in the world don t mix. God loves me only when I am perfect. I often worry about whether God can love me. I am not good enough for God to love. I am sometimes anxious about whether God still loves me. I have sometimes felt that I have committed the unforgivable sin. I am confident of God s love for me I know I am not perfect but God loves me anyway. God s love for me has no strings attached. God loves me regardless. God s love for me is unconditional. Even when I do bad things, I know God still loves me. God s compassion knows no religious boundaries. I think God even loves atheists. I can t imagine anyone whom God couldn t love. God s mercy is for everyone. Even if my beliefs about God were wrong, God would still love me. I think of God as more compassionate than demanding. I imagine God to be rather formal, almost standoffish. God can easily be provoked by disobedience. God is looking for a chance to get even with me. I think God only loves certain people. Running the world is more important to God than caring about people. I think God must enjoy getting even with us when we deserve it. I get what I pray for. I am a very powerful person because of God. I know what to do to get God to listen to me. God almost always answers my prayers. God sometimes intervenes at my request. When I obey God s rules, God makes good things happen for me. If God listens to prayer, you couldn t prove it by me. Asking God for help rarely does me any good. No matter how hard I pray it doesn t do me any good. I get no help from God even if I pray for it. God rarely if ever seems to give me what I ask for. I don t think my faith gives me any special influence with God. I think God mostly leaves people free. God lets the world run by its own laws. Mostly I have to provide for myself. I am pretty much responsible for my own life. God does not do much to determine the outcome of my life. What happens in my life is largely a result of decisions I make. God is in control of my life. God will always provide for me. I often feel that I am in the hands of God. The voice of God tells me what to do. I am particularly drawn to the image of God as a shepherd. Even when I mess things up, I know God will straighten them out. Source Lawrence, R. T. (1997). Measuring the image of God The God Image Inventory and the God Image Scales. Journal of Psychology and Theology, 25(2),

7 My Personal Faith Statement The preceding steps might be pulled together in a personal faith statement. Writing your own current statement of faith offers an opportunity to reflect on and affirm what you believe. It is your own profession of faith. Youth often prepare a personal faith statement as part of their confirmation, but faith also evolves throughout life. At this point in your spiritual life, what is most central to your faith? What do you most deeply believe or know to be true spiritually? One possible resource to help you consider what you believe is Paul Pruyser s (1976) seven themes in spiritual experience listed below. For each of them there is a set of questions to stimulate your thinking about what you believe. You will probably relate to some of the dimensions more easily than others. Theme 1 Awareness of the Holy (Experiences of awe, reverence, bliss, joy) What do you regard as sacred or holy? What gives you a sense of awe or wonder? For what/whom are you willing to make significant sacrifices? When in your life have you felt a deep sense of joy? Theme 2 Providence (Experiences of benevolence, trust, hope) What do you imagine God is like? What or whom do you trust? What image do you have about what happens after death? What gives you hope? Theme 3 Faith (Experiences of deep security, safety, courage, commitment) To what/whom are you most committed in life? How safe do you feel in your life? What or whom do you believe in, have faith in? What things are you anxious about? Theme 4 Gratitude (Experiences of grace, blessing, forgiveness, contentment) For what are you most grateful? When in your life have you felt truly blessed? When has it been hard for you to forgive someone? When have you experienced forgiveness from someone? Theme 5 Repentance (Experiences of remorse, regret, contrition) In what ways could you be a better person? What things in your life have you regretted? When have you felt guilty or ashamed? When have you seen a need for change in yourself and done it? Theme 6 Connection (Experiences of belonging, caring, being loved, union) In what ways do you feel connected to other people? Where do you feel at home, like you belong? Whom do you care for? Who cares for you? Theme 7 Vocation (Experiences of meaning, purpose, calling) How do you understand your purpose in life? How do you spend your time? Why? What do you want to do with the years of your life? Source: Paul W. Pruyser (1976). The minister as diagnostician: Personal problems in pastoral perspective. Philadelphia: Westminster Press. Pondering questions like those above, begin to draft your own current statement of faith on page 7. 7

8 How might you complete this statement? (John 9 25) But this I do know:. One way to get started is by listing core beliefs that you want to include in your faith statement. These may emerge as you reflect on the spiritual themes above. What are some words, phrases, beliefs or themes that definitely belong in your statement of faith? Now put your beliefs together in a paragraph, a personal statement of faith. The length of the statement is up to you. 8