Last week was #4, and where we got to was:

Transcription

1 Sermon Script: Freedom from Negative Emotions We re in a series called The Next 100 With the Centenary behind us, what might God have in store for us in the next 100 years I m inviting you to tell me what you d love to see happen here Some things people wrote last week: [See Sheet] And here are the 4 points that I came to this series with Last week was #4, and where we got to was: 1

2 Someone asked me to describe that outreach pastor role a bit more What if you had an evangelist on staff? who was also a good leader who helped us become the kind of church where there are always new Christians or inquirers hanging around? What if that person was also able to help our community ministries thrive? And what if they also were the touchpoint for the likes of Love where you live and Christmas in rocket park? This would enable us to sharpen the things we already do And open some exciting new possibilities I think I ve found a guy who could do this He applied for the international pastor role, but sounded equally like an outreach pastor 2

3 There s some work still to do but it may be that we could present and vote on him at the members meeting at the end of Nov But can we employ him to do both those roles? I believe that would be an awesome boost for the church But we have to decide that together So let s give that some thought over the next while For today I want to look at #1: The Title is Freedom from Negative Emotions What negative emotions? Well one top writer on this subject believes there are 8 primary emotions So all other emotions fit under one of these headings: 3

4 What if you could rid the church of anger? Or fear imagine the church without fear! Imagine the impact on our community if we weren t afraid! Imagine if we were never afraid of tough conversations with each other And what about shame? What if we could banish all unnecessary feelings of shame or guilt? That would be revolutionary for many of us And aren t these exactly the things that hold us back? We want to be an Acts 2 church A redemptive community of oneness Where people come amongst us and are amazed that something is so different to the rest of the world And they find healing and hope here 4

5 But half the time in churches the opposite is true We beat each other up at members meetings Feel resentment towards each other Divide over all kinds of things The church that s supposed to be the light and hope of the world becomes a place of trench warfare Who on earth would be attracted to that? As far as mission to the world goes that church has completely shot itself in the foot It s like this cartoon: Can you imagine if it were possible to take all the anger, and all the fear and jealousy and bitterness and sadness and shame out of the church forever? Churches would grow like wildfire! 5

6 Can you imagine if it were possible to take all the anger and fear out of your life? Those fears that hold you back in all kinds of areas of your life gone! Well today s title Freedom from Negative Emotions feels preposterously big - Like fixing the whole world in one sermon! Realistically we re not going to find freedom from those emotions this side of heaven But it is possible to stop being controlled by them And I believe learning how to constructively deal with these issues is part of what we re supposed to figure out in preparation for heaven Churches haven t talked about this nearly enough in recent times I chatted with Greg Liston about today s preposterously big topic and we agreed it needed narrowing down - So here s the new alternative title for today s message: 6

7 In Matthew 18 - all I want to do ask why each thing in it happened So beginning at verse 1 in Matthew 18, we get this: About that time the disciples came to Jesus and asked, Who is greatest in the Kingdom of Heaven? 2 Jesus called a little child to him Matt 18:1-2 It s easy to focus on Jesus illustration with the child here but what I want to know is why did the disciples even ask this question? Why did greatness matter to them? Were they afraid of being ordinary? Maybe having made it from fisherman to disciple of important Rabbi they wanted to make sure it all led to something o Like getting a job that reflects your qualifications Maybe they wanted to be noticed o More than just one of the crowd 7

8 To stand out in some way? Maybe they were looking for security And being a cut above other people would make them feel secure now I ve made it But that s precisely the problem with greatness when you become great, you re above other people Jesus picks up on this when he says: Beware that you don t look down on any of these little ones in verse 10 It s the desire to be a cut above other people that leads to things like the caste system Or the awful class structures that people read about in Jane Austin novels Jesus is in fact exposing their inner world - Their inner motivations - If you re in genuine Christian community, some of your inner world will start to be exposed - It s an opportunity for you to grow When people want to be great it really stuffs up churches Because the New Testament vision of the church is one where there are no hierarchies No social climbing ladders No in-crowd or cliques; no old boys network No pleasing people and working the system That sort of rubbish happens in the world, but it s not supposed to in the church The church was designed as a community of Oneness But the problem is it most certainly does happen to Christians 8

9 Be honest: How many of us want to be great? Maybe you re not a brash type of person, but most of us want to stand out in some way Some of us have a need to be noticed Some of us are afraid that we might be viewed by others as ordinary, average Some of us find security in being better than others at something Could it be that most of us in fact, are just like the disciples? To be clear the pursuit of excellence in something is fine the pursuit of greatness is not because it involves placing yourself above other people Having dealt with a lot of musicians in my time I ve heard some young performers say: When I m older I want to be famous My question is Why? Why do you want to be famous? Will that feed some need that you have? Will it finally make you feel like someone? Do you think fame will really fill those needs for you? And I say that because I ve been down that track myself Whenever I met someone as a teen and young adult I wanted them also to know that I could play the piano really well That there was something great about me Just being me wasn t enough Sometimes I also wanted people to know I was great at sport too 9

10 o Then they d think I was doubly great I had a need to be noticed, to be thought of as special As a student I had a need to get high marks Because then I could be great I needed to do better than others; to be above them Even as a Bible College student doing preaching fieldwork A guy in my congregation scored me a 6.5 out of 10 for one sermon I remember feeling shocked you can t do that I m supposed to get 8 s Didn t you get the memo? How s my GPA supposed to recover from this? But that need to be great is everywhere Some need to be better looking than others so they wear clothes to emphasise it Some need to be viewed as funny or competent or accomplished or wealthy Some need to be part of a particular group of friends Because each of these things can put you up here, and others down there But Jesus said: Beware that you don t look down on these little ones Not just, Try not to, but Beware And if it sounds like a young person s problem as a pastor I ve been amazed how many times a person s midlife crisis really comes down to: I thought by this stage of my life I was going to be great. But I m not. In churches greatness sometimes translates as: 10

11 looking down your nose at someone because they don t: serve as much as you attend services as much as you attend prayer meetings as much as you or connect with the community as much as you Jesus would say don t do that in the church don t make yourself better than anyone or look down on anyone if you have a need to be noticed or to stand out, pay attention to that talk to some wise people about that get some insight about yourself This passage won t answer all your questions about greatness - But there is a basic principle at work: - The desire for greatness destroys Christian community - Beware that you don t look down on any of these little ones Next up is verse 15: 11

12 What could ve prompted Jesus to say this? - Maybe there was gossip or backstabbing going on - Maybe Jesus just knew that people have a fear of talking face to face on tough issues and that the church wouldn t have a chance unless decided it would be different Why are we so afraid to talk face to face on difficult issues? - Are we afraid we ll be misunderstood? - Are we afraid of being hurt more? - Do we lack courage? When you ve been hurt by someone it s 100 times easier to tell someone else who can empathise with us and make us feel better 12

13 and maybe even get a bit militant on our behalf rather than talk face to face with the person who hurt us We say to ourselves he wouldn t get it there s no point I ve been hurt too much she never listens Jesus exposes our inner world - Why are we afraid of those face to face conversations? - Do we want to grow past that? - Or will that fear always rule us? If you need some specifics on this one then - Always speak about others as if they are in the room - Copy every you write to Jesus and your mother - Or: Just don t write emotive stuff in s, ever - You can t sort someone out by it doesn t work - You end up feeling tense for ages until you see them and talk face to face anyway And if you re a social media user remember that your online persona is actually you - I m amazed with young teenage or young adult Christians how they can use the F word in facebook posts, 13

14 as if how I express myself online doesn t matter, because that s not the real me, it s just online me These verses in Matthew 18 don t provide the answer to every kind of church conflict - But it does introduce two important principles: o Talking face to face and safety [Christian flat adultery note under door I remember it being so hard to talk face to face] I guess this is one reason why we are introducing a Chat with the Elders opportunity next Sunday and will do each term - We want to aim to be transparent as leaders and listen to people - But also, if you re upset about something, it s too easy to blow up about it in a church meeting - Instead, come talk about things before they become big issues On to the third area: 14

15 Why would Peter be asking this? - There must have been some annoying person in his life who kept letting him down - Maybe he felt like a doormat - Maybe he was angry at being short changed As Jesus talks and shares the parable of the unforgiving debtor he is exposing Peter s inner world - Peter has unforgiveness in his life - And he wants Jesus to justify him in it There are so many great questions & insights on how forgiveness works but the first, most important principle Jesus wants him to get is this: - You can t base forgiveness on what is fair and it s not something you earn - God didn t forgive you because it was fair or because you earned it 15

16 - So go and forgive people freely in the way God forgave you How much unforgiveness do you think there is in churches? - How much unforgiveness is there in your life? [Digby bit to change the world helping a broken church find healing someone I trusted as a mentor, someone who s sermons had guided me, so let down. counsellor: wave your fist. Didn t need to. Taken time. Now he s a mentor to me again] So where does this sermon land? - The three easy ways to stuff up a church that we ve covered could be summarised as: - Don t seek greatness, don t gossip and don t harbour unforgiveness - Simple right? - Do I think that s all going to happen just because I preached it in a sermon on 25 October 2015? - Not really What I really want to challenge us all to do today is let Jesus into your inner world where your emotions lurk the stuff that happens in here - Because if you do that, you are investing not just in yourself but also in the health of this church I don t want to be part of a church that wears masks where people never get real with each other - Where people are never really honest - And don t want to deal with any of their inner stuff because it s too hard 16

17 - That s just plastic - That s false - That s a club, not a church - It s when we care more about image than real discipleship In your life groups in your ministry groups in your relationships with people here - Don t settle for a diet of idle chit chat about favourite movies and the rugby If you re wondering how Marty McFly fits into all of this - It s simple: You could get Marty McFly to do absolutely anything just by calling him chicken - It s like a button and if you press it, he ll react - As crazy as that seems, every one of us have buttons that can be pressed just like Marty - We have bruises from things earlier in our lives - If you press on a bruise it hurts - So you need to know how to care for that bruise The reality is all of us have work to do on our inner selves - But can we be bothered to do it? When you do real Christian community like the disciples were with Jesus your inner motivations will over time come to light - Allow people to speak into your life 17

18 - Allow God to do the surgery that can make you into a much better you And as often as not it takes specialist help to undo some of the rubbish of our lives - Because undoing the power of negative emotions in your life is bigger than any of us can manage on our own Over the years I ve recommended counsellors to loads of people - Lots of them did that - But many NZers have an aversion to going to counsellors - Maybe it s the no.8 wire thing that says: I ll fix it myself - Maybe it s a belief that going to a counsellor is a sign of weakness But the opposite is true - It s the courageous people not the weak who go to see counsellors - People who are strong enough to be able to face their inner stuff - That takes courage; it takes character None of us can grow in our discipleship if we refuse to deal with our personal stuff Let Jesus in to your inner world let him show you the path to freedom from negative emotions that affect your life - Have the courage to face the long term issues in your life that hold you back - Help us in doing that to build a mature community 18

19 - Are you prepared to go on an inner journey and discover more about yourself, as part of our vision for next year? 19