LONG HOLLOW BAPTIST CHURCH FROM THIS DAY FORWARD: 4 KEYS TO A GREAT MARRIAGE WE WILL PUT GOD FIRST (1 CORINTHIANS 7:17-40) SEPTEMBER 23, 2012 DISCUSSION PLAN PREPARATION > SPEND THE WEEK STUDYING 1 CORINTHIANS 7:17-40. Consult the commentary provided and any additional study tools (such as a concordance or Bible dictionary) to enhance your preparation. > DETERMINE which discussion points and questions will work best with your group. > PRAY for our pastors and the sermon series, the upcoming group meeting, your teaching, your group members, and their receptivity to the lesson. HIGHLIGHTS > BIBLICAL EMPHASIS: In 1 Corinthians 7, Paul addressed some questions raised by the Corinthian believers in a letter they wrote to him (7:1). Verses 17-40 include his reply to their question about how to live for God regardless of their life circumstances. > LIFE APPLICATION: God created us to be in relationship with other people. Throughout our lives, these relationships change, but one relationship we have remains constant our relationship with God. Our primary focus as Christians should always be on God alone. This means He must also be the focus of our marriages. INTRODUCTION As your group time begins, use this section to help get the conversation going. If you had to pick one thing, what would you say is your priority in life? Where do you think marriage should rank on your list of priorities? Before what? After what? In what ways are the priorities of Christian marriages different from non-christian marriages? In what ways are they similar? UNDERSTANDING Unpack the biblical text to discover what Scripture says or means about a particular topic. In this passage Paul emphasized that our life situations shouldn t negatively affect our relationship with God. What matters most is bringing glory to God and remaining focused on serving Him regardless of our circumstances. > HAVE A VOLUNTEER READ 1 CORINTHIANS 7:17-24. In verses 17-24, Paul taught that Christians should remain in the situation God called them to. What was Paul saying to believers? Why would this be an important rule he instituted in all the churches? 1 WE WILL PUT GOD FIRST LONG HOLLOW BAPTIST CHURCH
DISCUSSION PLAN What different examples did Paul give in making this point? Throughout his New Testament writings, Paul referred to the Christian as Christ s slave. What does it mean to be a slave to Christ? What is the priority, the main focus, of a slave? In light of this, what should be the priority of someone who is a slave to Christ? The Greek word translated slave literally means bondslave. The noun probably comes from a verb that means to tie or to bind. A bondslave was totally subservient, bound to his master s will. Every Christian, no matter their circumstances, is to live at their Lord s disposal. Are you offended at being called a slave of Christ? Why or why not? What price were we bought with (v. 23)? How does this truth motivate you to live as a slave to Christ? What are some of the benefits to being a slave to Jesus? If both you and your spouse are living as slaves to Jesus, what is the impact on your marriage? Every Christian is a slave of Christ. We are to live fully given over to Jesus and the spread of His gospel. One of the great paradoxes in the Christian faith is that only through slavery to Christ do we find true freedom. This is a recurring theme in Paul s letters. Living for God is more important than everything else in life. Paul applied this point to relationships in the next set of verses. > HAVE A VOLUNTEER READ 1 CORINTHIANS 7:25-31. Was Paul anti-marriage? Why or why not? In verse 28, Paul noted that those who marry will have trouble in this life. In light of his teaching on living solely for God, what troubles do you think he was alluding to? What concerns do those who are married have that singles do not? Do you know anyone who has chosen to remain single? What is their reasoning for doing so? Paul did not define trouble in this life, but the possibility is that it refers to the responsibilities and hardships that can attend marriage and having kids. Improperly handled, these can distract us from devotion to God. 2 WE WILL PUT GOD FIRST LONG HOLLOW BAPTIST CHURCH
DISCUSSION PLAN Why was Paul motivated by a sense of urgency? What do you think he had in mind when he mentioned that the time is limited (v. 29)? What do the specific things Paul mentioned in verses 29-31 have in common? How does a sense of urgency for Jesus return affect the way we live day to day? Paul never lost sight of Jesus pending return. In Matthew 25, Jesus told a series of parables that encouraged His disciples to anticipate His return and be ready for that day. In light of Christ s return, all Christians should devote themselves to sharing the gospel and living holy lives. Do you live with Paul s sense of urgency for Jesus return? Why or why not? If not, what would change if you lived each day as if Jesus was coming back? > HAVE ANOTHER VOLUNTEER READ 1 CORINTHIANS 7:32-40. In your own words, what is Paul s main point in these verses? Whether people marry or not, what is the overriding issue here? Do you agree with his comparisons between marriage and singleness? Why or why not? Which of his statements is most surprising to you? Do you resonate with the specific anxieties or concerns Paul mentioned in connection with your stage of life? If not, what are your chief concerns as a married adult? As a single adult? In this section Paul shared his motivation for espousing the remain-as-you-are principle for single men, virgin daughters, their fathers, and widows. It comes down to this: The significant change in life status that would result from these choices, particularly during a time of present distress (v. 26), could pose a distraction from devotion to the Lord. What are the biggest threats to a married person s devotion to and focus on God? On the other hand, what are the biggest threats to a single person s devotion to and focus on God? How do we ensure that we put God first in our marriages? What does this look like practically in your marriage? 3 WE WILL PUT GOD FIRST LONG HOLLOW BAPTIST CHURCH
DISCUSSION PLAN APPLICATION Help your group identify how the truths from the Scripture passage apply directly to their lives. Why must an undivided focus on God be a priority in marriage? What are the dangers facing our marriages when we fail to put God first? How divided is your devotion to the Lord in your current season of life? What are the main things that are distracting you? What is one step you can take to minimize distraction this week? What are some specific ways our group can encourage and help each other keep God and His gospel at the center of our lives and our marriages? What is something you and your spouse will commit to doing together this week to help keep God your number one priority? For those of you who are not married, what is one thing you can commit to doing to keep God your number one priority? Find someone to partner with and hold each other accountable. PRAY Pray that the people in your group will be encouraged to put God first in their singleness, dating relationships, or marriages. Pray especially that through this study on marriage we will learn how to glorify God through our relationship with our spouse. FOLLOW UP Midway through this week, send a follow-up e-mail to your group with some or all of the following information: Questions to consider as they continue to reflect on what they learned this week: What have been the biggest distractions to your attempt to put God first this week? What opportunity have you had to live out the gospel in front of your spouse? Did you take the opportunity? If so, what was the result? If not, what stopped you? A note of encouragement, following up on any specific prayer requests mentioned during your group gathering. The challenge to memorize 1 Corinthians 7:32-35. 4 WE WILL PUT GOD FIRST LONG HOLLOW BAPTIST CHURCH
LONG HOLLOW BAPTIST CHURCH FROM THIS DAY FORWARD: 4 KEYS TO A GREAT MARRIAGE WE WILL PUT GOD FIRST (1 CORINTHIANS 7:17-40) SEPTEMBER 23, 2012 COMMENTARY VARIOUS SITUATIONS OF LIFE (1 CORINTHIANS 7:17-24) 7:17-19 Paul issues a remain-as-you-are edict and illustrates it with a false dilemma facing a Jewish-born male Christian. Such a man had the option to remain circumcised or become uncircumcised (undo his circumcision) by undergoing a painful operation, as some secular-minded Jews did in the first century. These things are mere distractions. Paul zeroes in on what really matters: keeping the commands of God as those who belong to Him. 7:20-23 Paul again states the remain-as-you-are principle and illustrates it with a choice faced by slaves: to willingly remain a slave or to seek freedom. The apostle did not condemn slaves to a life of permanent slavery. By all means take the opportunity to become free if it presents itself, he said. But on the other hand, the fact of being a slave should not be a concern. His logic is thus: whether a Christian was free or a slave when he came to Christ, he owes lifetime obligations to the same master, Jesus Christ. In Roman parlance, a freedman was an emancipated slave, whereas a free man was one who had never been enslaved. ADVICE ON MARRIAGE AND SINGLENESS (1 CORINTHIANS 7:25-40) 7:25-27 The focus of this entire discussion is cast from the male perspective since ancient culture gave males primary responsibility for marital decisions. About serves as a marker denoting that Paul is now applying the remain-as-you-are principle (vv. 17-24) to the dilemma facing virgins. In this case Paul has no command from the Lord, but that does not lessen the impact of his teaching (i.e, it is fine for a man to remain as he is) since his opinion was made trustworthy by the Lord. Virgins in this context refers to betrothed, female virgins (cp. virgins for betrothed wives, Luke 1:27; 2 Cor. 11:2). Their dilemma was brought about by an unnamed present distress ( impending hardship ), possibly a famine that called the practicality of marital plans into doubt. Paul s talk of being bound to or loosed from a wife in verse 27 can be summarized as follows: (1) the man who was bound by promise to a betrothed virgin (essentially already his wife, given the seriousness of betrothal) was not to seek release from future obligations to consummate the marriage (v. 27a-b), and (2) the man who had already been released from obligation (to a virgin) was not to seek betrothal with another woman (v. 27c-d). In other words, keep your commitments and/or remain as you are. 7:28 Paul does not define trouble in this life. Possibly it refers to the responsibilities and hardships that can attend marriage and having kids. Improperly handled, these can distract us from devotion to God; see verses 32-35. 7:29-31 Regardless of a person s situation, he should live for the Lord. Two realities should heighten our emphasis on such a lifestyle of devotion: the time is limited and the world is passing away. 7:32 Paul s main concern was that all Christians, whatever their marital status, focus on serving God faithfully. That is the point of the phrase without concerns. Paul didn t elevate singleness over marriage or vice versa. His desire was for all Christians to serve God faithfully and not to be unduly concerned over whether to marry. Each status can have advantages. In Paul s view, an unmarried person could make his or her primary concern the things of the Lord specifically, learning ways to please the Lord. 5 WE WILL PUT GOD FIRST LONG HOLLOW BAPTIST CHURCH
COMMENTARY 7:33 Similarly, we shouldn t view the phrase concerned about the things of the world in this context as a negative judgment. The married man has been called by God to please his wife. That is not a bad thing! Married adults are expected to fulfill their responsibilities to their spouses. Without question, fulfilling family responsibilities can require time, energy, and money that otherwise might have been used in some particular expression of serving the Lord. However, Paul intentionally did not imply that either singleness or marriage is mandatory for all Christians. 7:34 The phrase he is divided is a reference to time available to take care of certain responsibilities. Again, Paul was not claiming that either marriage or singleness was a superior lifestyle, but rather was indicating that a single person would not have the same concerns as a married person. The phrase holy both in body and in spirit adds an important element to the single experience. All Christians, of course, are to be holy. We shouldn t think that Paul was sanctioning celibacy as the only means of keeping one s body holy. He was not opposed to married couples engaging in sexual relations. He didn t view sex as some kind of corruption of the body. So in what sense does a celibate single adult have a holy body? Recall that the root meaning of the term holy is to set apart. That which is set apart is dedicated to God. By resisting the temptation to engage in sexual relations outside marriage, single adults keep their bodies pure for God. Celibacy, then, becomes not a negative and reluctant option, but a positive and holy offering to God. 7:35 Paul was attempting to encourage his readers toward holy living whether they were married or single. His words were meant for their benefit. That he was mandating neither marriage nor singleness is clear from the phrase not to put a restraint on you. 7:36 The word virgin in this context refers to a young woman who is engaged but not yet married. With the phrase acting improperly, Paul envisioned a hypothetical couple struggling with the temptation to have sexual relations before marriage. Another possible translation of the Greek term is behaving dishonorably. Take note that Paul clearly described premarital sex as improper behavior. The phrase do what he wants means that Paul affirmed the right to marry for single adults who do not have the gift of celibacy. In this section of 1 Corinthians, Paul unquestionably expressed a preference for singleness; but he also affirmed the purpose and value of marriage. 7:37 Some in the Corinthian church may have been touting a demand that all believers, including married couples, practice a celibate lifestyle. Paul repeatedly emphasized that each individual is free to make up his or her mind concerning marriage. The phrases stands firm in his heart... under no compulsion... control over his own will... decided in his heart indicate that Paul supported both married and single lifestyles as legitimate for believers. The phrase to keep his own virgin refers to a man who had become engaged but later decided not to marry his fiancée. Paul s point, however, was that the man and the woman were free to make this decision on their own, without external compulsion. 7:38 Paul laid out the two options. The couple could either marry or not marry. Paul again indicated both his approval of either choice and his preference for singleness. The couple that marries does well, and the couple that decides not to marry does even better. 7:39 This verse shifts from the scenario of a young couple contemplating marriage to the situation of a widow. That she is bound as long as her husband is living is a strong affirmation of the marriage covenant. However, a woman is free to remarry after her husband has passed away. Only in the Lord means that she should marry only a Christian man. 6 WE WILL PUT GOD FIRST LONG HOLLOW BAPTIST CHURCH