Intimate Relationships and Communication

Transcription

1 Intimate Relationships and Communication Chapter Four Professor Betty C Jung Developing Intimate Relationships Successful relationships - a positive self-concept and healthy self-esteem to help love and respect others Personal identity must be allowed to develop Professor Betty C Jung 1

2 Friendships Characteristics Companionship Respect Acceptance Help Trust Loyalty Reciprocity Strong relationships comprise of: Trust Caring Respect Loyalty Interest in the other Concern of other s well-being Professor Betty C Jung Triangular Theory of Love Intimacy: Passion: Commitment: Professor Betty C Jung 2

3 Relationship Challenges Honesty and Openness Emotional intelligence Unequal or Premature commitment Unrealistic Expectations Expecting your partner to change Assuming Fulfill all your needs Giving up autonomy/selfsufficiency Competitiveness Focus on Fun Balance of time together and apart Jealousy Measure of insecurity or possessiveness Supportiveness Professor Betty C Jung Unhealthy Relationships Recognizing Unhealthy Relationships Co-dependency Too much time spent together Ending a Relationship Guidelines for a breakup Give the relationship a fair chance Be fair and honest Be tactful and compassionate If you are the rejected person, make time for resolving your anger and pain Recognize the value of the experience Professor Betty C Jung 3

4 Communication Nonverbal (65% of face-to-face) Ability to interpret nonverbal messages A main problem with menwomen communication is the unwillingness to compromise Professor Betty C Jung Gender differences in communication Men Establishing dominance/competiti ve Talk more/listen less Women Establish friendships (affiliative) Seek advice Obtain cues from listening and eye contact Emotional Intelligence & Mindfulness Emotional Intelligence Factors Cultivated by:, Professor Betty C Jung 4

5 Online Relationships Professor Betty C Jung Hooking Up Casual sexual encounters Lack of emotional with acquaintances or intimacy strangers with no Emotional & mental commitment or investment health consequences in a relationship (sexual regret, negative ~80% of college students emotional reactions, have done this once psychological distress, Alcohol + sexual risk taking depression, anxiety) -> negative health effects Research: Having sex (eg, STDs/STIs) (even casual sex) releases hormones that cause feelings of bonding and attachment Professor Betty C Jung 5

6 2013 Connecticut Data Professor Betty C Jung Conflict Resolution Techniques Conflict resolution skills are vital for maintaining intimate relationships 1Clarify the issue 2Find out what each person wants 3Brainstorming for options 4Decide how to negotiate 5Solidify the agreements 6Review and renegotiate Professor Betty C Jung 6

7 Marital Status of US Population (15 years and Older), Marriage 2 Single-hood 3 Single Parenthood 4 Cohabitation 5 Step/Blended Families 6 Gay and Lesbian Partnerships Professor Betty C Jung Cohabitation Professor Betty C Jung 7

8 Choosing a Partner Most will consider: Geographical area Similar ethnic and socioeconomic background Educational level Lifestyle Physical attractiveness Common characteristics (sharing the same values) make for successful relationships Religion Political beliefs Sexual attitudes Family/children Professor Betty C Jung Same Sex Partnerships Professor Betty C Jung 8

9 Same-Sex Marriage NYTimescom» Breaking News Alert BREAKING NEWS Same-Sex Marriage Is a Right, the Supreme Court Rules, 5-4 Friday, June 26, :04 AM EDT In a long-sought victory for the gay rights movement, the Supreme Court ruled on Friday that the Constitution guarantees a nationwide right to same-sex marriage The decision, the culmination of decades of litigation and activism, came against the backdrop of fast-moving changes in public opinion, with polls indicating that most Americans now approve of same-sex marriage Professor Betty C Jung Single-hood & Marriage Single-hood Diverse group 110 million single individuals Median age for marriage is 282 years for and 261 for Can occur any time in one s life span Marriage Benefits of Marriage Issues of marriage Realistic expectations Feels good about the personality of their mate Communication Conflict resolution Religious and ethical values Egalitarian role Good balance of individual and joint interests Professor Betty C Jung Role of Commitment 9

10 Separation & Divorce Process of Divorce: Emotional separation - First step Physical separation 2 nd greatest stressproducing event in life (Death of spouse is #1) Recovery from divorce Professor Betty C Jung Unfulfilled Expectations: Belief that marriage will Ease the need to deal with own faults Change faults in your partner Provide the avenue to continue your personal power Provide a partner to meeting all your needs Belief that romance will continue at the same level throughout marriage Parenting Styles Demandingness: Authoritative: Responsiveness: Permissive: Authoritarian: Uninvolved: Professor Betty C Jung 10

11 Family Life Birth of a first child is one of the most stressful transitions for any couple Marital roles tend to become more traditional Children s temperaments Easy children Difficult children Slow-to-warm-up Professor Betty C Jung Successful families can cope successfully with stress and crisis Commitment Appreciation Communication Time together Spiritual wellness Coping with stress and crisis Family Life Styles Single Parent Families Toughest US Census Bureau - 27% of all children under 18 live with only one parent Professor Betty C Jung Step/Blended Families 3 out of 4 women and 4 out of 5 men will remarry Should not be expected to duplicate the emotions and relationships of an intact family Healthy stepfamilies are less cohesive and more adaptable than healthy intact families Allow for more individual differences More of a history they have the more of a family unit is built 11