Parents Awareness session November 2016

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1 Parents Awareness session November 2016 English Martyrs RC Primary School

2 English Martyrs RC Primary School Aims To discuss what bullying is and types. To understand what Anti-Bullying Week is and its aims and outcomes. How we can encourage our children to use their Power of Good. To explore how to spot signs of bullying. How to talk to your child about bullying.

3 English Martyrs RC Primary School

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5 What does the word bullying mean to you?

6 What Is Bullying? Bullying is purposely hurting someone else. Bullying is repetitive which means it happens again and again. It is not the same as something happening just once. Bullying can be physical, verbal and mental. Bullying can hurt the victim in many different ways.

7 What Is Physical Bullying? Physical bullying can range from shoving and jostling someone to more severe physical abuse such as hitting, kicking or biting. It is often more obvious to other people as it may leave bruises or other visible damage. Also, people may see it happening to the bullying victim.

8 What Is Verbal Bullying? Verbal bullying means calling someone names, saying nasty things to someone or being threatening to them. Verbal bullying is not always as clear to see as it can be done more secretly and doesn't leave visible marks. However, it damages peoples feelings and emotions and is very harmful.

9 Cyberbullying What is cyberbullying? In what ways do you think cyberbullying can happen? prank phone calls receiving nasty or inappropriate s someone posting nasty or inappropriate photos of someone online nasty comments on social media like Facebook, Twitter, Bebo, within chat rooms or in a messaging app getting nasty or inappropriate texts

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11 Indirect or Social Bullying Physically bullying, like hitting or kicking, and verbal abuse, like calling names or making fun of someone, are often more obvious to see. What do you think indirect or social bullying is? Leaving people out of groups or games this hurts people s feelings, and if you do it to someone all the time, it is considered to be bullying. Gossiping about people and talking about someone behind their back. Standing by and watching you may not be the one doing the bullying, but if you know it is happening to someone then you need to take action.

12 How we tell the children they can use their Power for Good? If they think someone they know is being bullied then encourage them to: tell someone they trust a parent, teacher, or an older relative. They can make sure it is dealt with appropriately. smile at the person, talk to them or include them in something they are doing. It may just mean the world to them as often someone that is being bullied feels very alone, upset and frightened.

13 English Martyrs RC Primary School Why children bully There are many reasons children and young people may get involved in bullying, such as: *feeling powerless *low self-esteem *trying to get admiration and attention from friends *fear of being left out if they don t join in *not understanding how someone else is feeling *taking out their angry feelings *a culture of aggression and bullying *being bullied themselves

14 English Martyrs RC Primary School As a parent you may not be able to control the community or peer group that your son or daughter is part of. But there are important things you can do to reduce the chances of your child getting involved in bullying whether it s bullying others, being bullied themselves, or not taking any action when they see someone else bullying. Let s start by thinking about self-esteem. We talk a lot about self-esteem these days, but what exactly do we mean by it and why does it matter? Self-esteem could be described as a basic sense of self-worth. It s not about thinking you are better than everyone else, it s about caring about yourself and other people and feeling confident to handle situations, relationships and the ups and downs of life. Self-esteem affects the way children think, behave and relate to others. A child with self-esteem doesn t need to dominate others to make themselves feel good and is able to stand up for themselves when they need to.

15 S How to spot the signs of bullying English Martyrs RC Primary School You may be unsure if your child is involved in a bullying incident. He or she could be acting as a bully, being bullied or upset because they have seen others behaving badly. If you suspect that your child is involved in bullying these may be signs: *bruises *broken or missing possessions *becoming withdrawn not talking, or spending more time alone *changes in eating habits *changes in behaviour becoming aggressive at home *sleeping badly *complaining of headaches or stomach aches *wetting the bed *worrying about going to school *suddenly doing less well at school

16 English Martyrs RC Primary School But there could be other reasons for these signs, so try to avoid jumping to conclusions. Ask yourself the following questions: *Is there anything else bothering my child? *Have there been changes at home like a new baby, or divorce or separation? If there has not been any other changes and you suspect bullying may be the cause of the distress and anxiety, it is important to try and act as early as you can.

17 English Martyrs RC Primary School How does bullying affect a child? Many young people feel very distressed and powerless to put a stop to bullying. Bullying can impact how well your child does at school, their ability to make friends and can have an effect on them for many years. PARTNERSHIP BEWTWEEN HOME & SCHOOL IS ESSENTIAL TO SUPPORT YOUR CHILD IF THEY ARE BEING BULLIED * She has a mentor at the school which she sees once a week. They work on building her self-esteem and self-worth and help with friendships. School worked on her confidence and gradually brought her out of herself, building up the confidence she lost. It s so nice to see the difference. The school uses the SEAL/PSHE programme. They re really proactive using it which can only be a bonus, so I m hoping that will filter through. There s a lovely atmosphere in the school and they do a lot of anti-bullying work in the classroom. Children and young people can be positively supported through these experiences and there are ways to develop their confidence a

18 English Martyrs RC Primary School How to talk to your child about Bullying Children may find it hard to talk about bullying. Try to explain that bullying is behaving in a way that upsets someone and that this can affect other children so badly that they don't want to go to school. If the bullying involves physical abuse like hitting or kicking, recall a time when your child was upset because they were hurt and explain that this is how someone else feels when they are attacked. Ask your child how he/she would feel if someone was behaving like this to him/her and what he/she would want to have done about it.

19 What to do if your child is a bully English Martyrs RC Primary School Your first reaction might be disbelief that your well-behaved son or daughter is being accused of bullying. But before you dismiss the thought out of hand, listen to what the school has to say about it. Parents rarely complain to a school at the outset of bullying, there's usually been a history of unhappiness. Sometimes the child being bullied is affected so much and has had to take time off school through fear and may be suffering such distress that they need to see a doctor. You need to take what the school says seriously and work with staff on a solution. There are times when people are unjustly accused of being bullies but a thorough investigation should reveal this. Sanctions Sanctions against your child could include a warning, detention, temporary or permanent exclusion (expulsion). A violent, one-off incident harming another pupil could be grounds for expulsion. If an incident involves violence, text phone abuse or demands for money then the victim and their parents should, and probably will, make a complaint to the police if the bully is over the age of criminal responsibility which is 10 in England and Wales. You might find it helpful to ask for a copy of the school bullying policy so that you can go through it with your child.

20 What to do about racist bullying English Martyrs RC Primary School Britain is a multi-racial and multi-faith country and everyone has the right to have their culture and religion respected by others. Nobody has the right to call your child names or to treat them badly because of their colour, race or religion. It's illegal and it can be stopped. Racist bullying is not just about the colour of your skin, it can be about your ethnic background or religion too. Racist bullying is the only type of bullying that schools must record. What is racism? Racism means you are subjected to abuse and harassment because of your race, colour or beliefs. There is a difference between racial discrimination and racism. Racial discrimination means being treated differently to someone else because of your race, perhaps by being told you cannot wear a turban if you are a Sikh, a yarmulka if you are a Jewish boy or hijaab if you are a Pakistani girl. What is racist bullying In the 1999 MacPherson Report, racist bullying was defined as "any incident which is perceived to be racist by the victim or any other person Racist bullying is an offence

21 English Martyrs RC Primary School What to do about bullying out of school hours Bullying frequently happens out of school and is often a source of trouble between neighbours and divides roughly 50:50 into school bullies and serious problems with local children. If these children are pupils at the same school as your child then it's sensible to warn the school that trouble at home could spill over into school. Schools can act over bullying on the way to and from school. In 2004 the Department for Education (DfE) issued guidance to schools reminding them they can take action on bullying on the journey to and from school Schools won't normally take action over incidents at weekends or during the school holidays.

22 Use your Power for Good

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