MAKING THE GRADE IN GRADUATE SCHOOL: A TOOLBOX FOR SUCCESS

Transcription

1 MAKING THE GRADE IN GRADUATE SCHOOL: A TOOLBOX FOR SUCCESS Betty P. Shadrick, Ph.D. October 4, 2010

2 Outline 1). Welcome Self Introductions 2). Self Affirmations I am the story I tell myself I am Exercise 1: Count Your Blessings 3). Freeing Your Mind: Thinking Outside the Box Review of Key Concepts: As A Man Thinketh Exercise 2: Visual Crystal Water vs. Dirty Pebbles Review of Key Concepts: Think Big Exercise 3: The Hand & The Optimist Creed 4). Proven Study Skill Techniques Review: Seven Habits of Highly Effective People Review: Ten Steps to the Head of the Class Apply the ABC s of Personal Accountability Exercise 4: Complete My Personal Commitment 5). Developing Your Assertiveness Style: Standing Up Inside Review Various Assertiveness Strategies 6). Effective Ways To Handle and Cope With Stress Exercise 5: Stress Reduction Exercises Discuss Your Guide to Better Mind/Body Health 7). The Concept of TEAM Together Everyone Achieves More Discuss the Importance of Teamwork/ Networking 8). Closing Reflections: Road Map to Success Evaluation 2

3 Self Affirmations What messages are you entertaining in your head? Do these messages propel you forward or limit your progress? What is positive self talk? What is involved in speaking up and not speaking down? Exercise 1 : Count Your Blessings Do we take the time to be thankful for what we have right now, or do we take it for granted? Are we so caught up in getting what we don't have that we fail to appreciate what we do have right now? What is really important to you? What is central to your well-being? By counting your blessings you come to realize how fortunate you truly are in the various dimensions of your life-your family, friends, work, spirit, career, education, personality, health, etc. To engage in this exercise, be still, go to a quiet place, breathe deeply and slowly and think about what you have to be thankful for. Let's stay in this quiet state for at least 5-10 minutes. When you have finished your "quiet state", write down everything that is revealed to you. *Source: Valorie Burton, (1999) Rich Minds, Rich Rewards: 52 Ways to Enhance, Enrich, and Empower Your Life, Villard: New York. 3

4 Exercise 1: My Blessings Keep your list of blessings and refer to them often, especially when you encounter those times of frustration, fear, uncertainty or when you feel those moments of "woe is me."* 4

5 Self Affirmations Continued I do not set limitations of myself today. I set my sights on a day of fulfillment, or goals accomplished, or growth and satisfaction. I think in terms of positive action and good results. Whatever it is that I need to meet or accomplish today, I feel confident of success. I know that I have power to meet and overcome every challenge. Negative appearances cannot limit me, for I possess the vitality, ideas and infinite time to do everything I need to do. I do not put off doing the task that awaits my attention. I am not bound by a consciousness of fear or delay. I move quickly, easily, and with sureness to demonstrate the energy, love and wisdom of purpose in all that I do today. Source: Unity School of Christianity 5

6 Free Your Mind: Thinking Outside the Box What does it mean as a person thinketh so is he or she? James Allen's seminal text: As A Man Thinketh (1902) written over a century ago still vibrates with timely and profound wisdom. Key concepts: The goal of this book is to stimulate men and women to discover and recognize the truth: "They themselves are makers of themselves." Excerpts from the text: Thought and Character "A man is literally what he thinks, his character being the complete sum of all his thoughts. " Effect of Thought on Circumstances "The outer world of circumstance shapes itself to the inner world of thought, and both the pleasant and unpleasant external conditions are actors which make for the ultimate good of the individual. As the reaper of his own harvest, man learns both by suffering and bliss. Effect of Thought on Health and Body "Out of a defiled mind proceeds a defiled life and a corrupt body. Thought is the font of action, life, and manifestation; make the fountain pure and all will be pure. Change of diet will not help a man who will not change his thoughts. When a man makes his thought pure he no longer desires impure food. Clean thoughts make clean habits. To perfect your body, guard your mind. If you would renew your body, beautify your mind. Thoughts of malice, envy, disappointment, despondency, rob the body of its health and grace. A sour face does not come by chance, it is made by sour thoughts." Thought and Purpose "Until thought is linked with purpose there is no intelligent accomplishment." Exercise 2 Visual: Crystal Water vs. Dirty Pebbles 6

7 Free Your Mind: Thinking Outside the Box Continued Discuss concepts from Dr. Benjamin Carson s text: THINK BIG (1992) T - Talents/Time, recognize them as gifts H- Hope for good things and be honest I - Insight from people and good books N - Be nice to all people K - Knowledge: Recognize it as the key to living B - Books-Read them actively I - In-depth learning skills, Develop them G - God: Never get too big for Him Exercise 3 The Hand & The Optimist Creed The Optimist Creed: Promise Yourself- To be so strong that nothing can disturb your peace of mind. To talk health, happiness and prosperity to every person you meet. To make all your friends feel that there is something in them. To look at the sunny side of everything and make your optimism come true. To think only the best, to work only for the best, and to expect only the best. To be just as enthusiastic about the success of others as you are about your own. To forget the mistakes of the past and press on to the greater achievements of the future. To wear a cheerful countenance at all times and to give every living creature you meet a smile. To give so much time to the improvement of yourself that you have no time to criticize others. To be too large for worry, too noble for anger, too strong for fear, and too happy to permit the presence of trouble. * *First Magazine, Summer

8 Proven Study Skills Review: Stephen Covey Seven Habits of Highly Effective People (1993) In many respects, successful students knowingly or unknowing adopt many of the attributes expounded in Stephen Covey s text, The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People(1993) They are: Habit 1 Proactive Took responsibility for their attitudes and actions. If we break the work responsibility into two parts: response/ability, we can readily see that proactive people develop the ability to choose their response and these choices are made based upon their values and decisions not their moods and their conditions. Healthy, creative, and proactive students exercise their freedom to choose their response to any circumstance; they choose to look for opportunities not problems. By adopting this mindset they are empowered to select the best opportunity that fits or addresses their needs. Proactive students are responsible, planful, and purposeful. They know that good choices will yield good consequences. Habit 2 Begin with the End in Mind-Effective students realize that things are first created mentally before they are created physically. Through visualization, they are able to develop a personal mission statement or objectives, or blueprint for action, that focuses on what they want to be (character) and what they want to do (contributions and achievements). This mission statement serves as a means to clarify their values and set priorities. Mission statements are similar to positive affirmations, statements of what one wants and what one expects from life. Habit 3 Put First Things First-Involves organizing and managing time and events according to the personal mission statement, objective or blueprint for action identified in Habit 2. It is important to leverage our time and give more attention to things that are important, and less time to things that are urgent but unimportant. Only by saying NO to the unimportant can we say Yes to the important. Remember the traits of successful students-an individual who will say no to short lived pleasures or activities and yes to the truly important-i.e. writing the paper, studying for an exam, doing assigned homework. 8

9 Proven Study Skills-Continued Review: Stephen Covey Seven Habits of Highly Effective People (1993) Habit 4 Think Win-Win - Adopts an attitude of seeking mutual benefit and a commitment to explore all options until a mutually satisfactory solution is reached. It embodies an abundance mentality, a belief that there are enough pieces in the pie for everybody, rather than a scarcity mentality that believes there is only enough for the best, and they seek a win-lose solutions. Yet through win/win performance expectations adhere to five explicit elements: desired results, guidelines, resources, accountability, and consequences. Habit 5 Seek First to Understand, Then to Be Understood - Developing communication is one of the master skills in life, and the key to building win-win relationships. We all see the world as we are, not as it is. Our perceptions are often the result of our experiences and many communication problems are caused by differences in our perceptions. Yet to resolve these differences we must all learn to seek first to understand the perspective of the other person through listening. Basically there are five levels of listening: Ignore-Do not listen at all Pretend-Act as if you are listening Selective listening-hear only certain parts of the conversation Attentive listening-pay attention and focus energy on the words that are being said. Empathic listening-the highest form of listening-listening with the intent to understand, seeking first to really understand another, and hearing another person s point of view. The essence of empathic listening is not that you must agree with someone, it is that you fully, deeply, understand that person, both emotionally and intellectually. Developing good listening skills can only benefit the student s academic progress in class, while improving his/her ability to communicate effectively with faculty and fellow students. 9

10 Proven Study Skills-Continued Review: Stephen Covey Seven Habits of Highly Effective People (1993) Habit 6 Synergize- represents the habit of creative teamwork or cooperation. Relationships produce synergy when the whole is greater than the sum of its parts. Synergy results from valuing differences and by bringing divergent perspectives together in a spirit of mutual respect. Habit 7 Sharpen the Saw Self renewal undergirds all the other habits of successful students. The habit of sharpening the saw means having a balanced and systematic program for self-renewal in the four areas of our livesphysical, mental, emotional-social, and spiritual. Without balanced discipline, the body becomes weak, the mind mechanical, the emotions raw, the spirit insensitive, and the person becomes selfish. In the law of the harvest, we reap what we sow, and those that enjoy a bountiful harvest have cultivated these seven habits of effectiveness and live their lives in accordance with its underlying principles. Review: Samuel Betances Ten Steps to the Head of the Class (1998) Stop Procasti-cramming Stop Reckless Reading Stop Fishing for Answers Stop Post -Lecture Reading Stop Loafing in the Place of Study Stop Going Solo Stop Viewing teachers as Adultists Stop Seeking Solutions without Education Stop Pursuing Logical Paths to Wrong Destinations Stop Failing to Look Up by Not Getting Down Apply the ABC's of Personal Accountability A - Adjusting your behavior B - Building on your progress C - Continuing your collaborations Exercise 4: Complete My Personal Commitment 10

11 Developing Your Assertiveness Style: Standing Up Inside Review of various assertiveness strategies Robert Alberti & Michael Emmons Your Perfect Right: A Guide to Assertive Living (1992) What Does it Mean to be Assertive Examples of Assertive, Non Assertive and Aggressive Behavior The Components of Assertive Behavior Assertive Inventory 11

12 Effective Ways to Handle and Cope With Stress Effective Ways to Handle and Cope with Stress Take Stress Questionnaire 100 Ways to Handle Stress Stress Reduction Handouts Deskercise Exercise 5 Spiritual Bathing 12

13 The Concept of TEAM TEAM Together Everyone Achieves More Discuss the Importance of Teamwork/Networking Teamwork Form tight relationships with each other. Recognize you will accomplish more if you work together and are not in competition with each other. Bob Gartner, who wrote, High Performance Through Teamwork, (1996) asserts: "Teamwork is an important part of your future, too. Sure, you're becoming more independent but working well with others is one of the things that will help you make it on your own. Employers notice employees who are "team player." Working well with groups of people is a skill you will need your whole life." Networking Because networking is important for success in the classroom and your career, it is important for you to be an active member in your job and classes. Volunteer for activities and projects Meet new people and exchange contact information Consider joining a professional organization There is no better time than now to strengthen or build your network. A solid network will serve you well for years to come and will be an additional tool in your toolbox... *Source: Kathy Jo Pollack, (2009) The Importance of Networking. < The_Importance_of_Networking.html> 13

14 Notes 14