Social media safety tips for parents of tweens & teens Ginger Kadlec: BeAKidsHero

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1 Social media safety tips for parents of tweens & teens Ginger Kadlec: BeAKidsHero

2 Online threats are REAL. An astonishing 95% of tweens and teens are online (Source: Pew Research). iphones, ipads and other mobile devices have become "vital" appendages to most teens... those devices are their social lifeline with other teens, as well as their instant connection to the rest of the world. While there are many advantages and fun-aspects of social media, there are also some very real dangers. Teens need help navigating those potential dangers and it s up to parents to play a key role in maintaining teens online safety. Pulling back the covers, we see some very scary statistics: More than 104 million child pornography images have been reviewed by the National Center for Missing and Exploited Children since This is number is increasing at an alarming rate due in large part to the Internet. In fact, the number of new images reviewed in 2013 was an astonishing 24 million, an increase of 30% in just one year. In 82% of online sex crimes against minors, the offender used the victim's social networking site to gain information about the victim's likes and dislikes. (Source: Journal of Adolescent Health, 2010) 65% of online sex offenders used the victim's social networking site to gain home and/or school information about the victim. (Source: Journal of Adolescent Health, 2010) 70% of kids ages 8 to 18 report unintentionally stumbling across pornographic images while online. The average age for a child to be exposed to online pornography is just 11 years old (Source: Enough Is Enough) Online threats are very real and can range from mildly age-inappropriate content to cyberbullying to sexual exploitation, assault or even death. So what can you as a parent do to help protect your teen from the very real dangers lurking on the Internet? For starters, know what apps your teen is downloading. Following is a quick rundown of 12 Scary Apps to put at the top of your watch list. *WARNING: Before you continue, please note some of the content in this report is graphic and intended for adults. 12 SCARY APPS 2015 Ginger Kadlec: BeAKidsHero Page 2

3 Ask.fm Ask.fm enables users to anonymously follow your teen and publically ask any question and I mean ANY question. The questions posted on this app cover the gamut! After reading all sorts of things about Ask.fm, I decided to download it myself... and was shocked. Within minutes of using the app, the 2nd question posed to me by an anonymous user was, "What is your bra size?" The image on the right is a screen shot of the stream feed. Please note the nature of the question that randomly appeared in my feed this is an example of what ANY Ask.fm user (i.e., your kids) could see in the stream. Ask.fm Questions screen shot. Ask.fm does offer some privacy settings, including the ability to hide posts from the stream and blacklist users. This app is highly integrated with Facebook and Twitter, so questions/responses to your teen s account can be set-up to automatically post to those apps, increasing the viral nature of the content generated on Ask.fm. YourSphere.com actually calls Ask.fm "a toxic site. Numerous cases of cyberbullying, some leading to suicide, can be tracked back to this app. Ask.fm Stream screen shot. 12 SCARY APPS 2015 Ginger Kadlec: BeAKidsHero Page 3

4 Qooh.me Similar to Ask.fm., Qooh.me allows users to post anonymous questions it has been reported that the anonymous questions posed are often mean spirited or totally inappropriate, even though the Qooh.me 'terms and conditions' state, "You may not use Qooh.me to abuse, bully, harass, threaten, malign, slander, impersonate or intimidate anyone." There are no age requirements or parental controls. Under its Cool Tips, Qooh.me allows users to tag others, totally anonymously. In fact, it states, The person you TAG won t see that (you re) tagging them. This gives you privacy. As with Ask.fm, questions are anonymous and Qooh.me specifies that the questions are untraceable. Oh, the cyberbullying dangers lurking in this app are endless 12 SCARY APPS 2015 Ginger Kadlec: BeAKidsHero Page 4

5 Creepy This name certainly fits the app! Creepy extracts geolocation data from other apps your teen is using (such as FourSqaure, Twitter or Flickr) and combines that with all public information about your teen that is available online. It then takes that data and actually plots on a map the physical whereabouts of your teen. Creepy can also provide a history of the places your teen has been based on the history of tweets and other social media posts. As you can imagine, this app can and has been used for predatory purposes, including stalking. Creepy screen shot (Source: softonic.com) Snapchat Widely known as "the sexting app, kids often think photos they share using Snapchat show from 1 to 10 seconds then immediately disappear... not true. Screenshots can be saved then distributed to others or photos can be sent to multiple recipients. The cute little Snapchat ghost logo is looks innocent enough, but please be aware of how this app can be misused. Snapchat icon (Source: Google Play) 12 SCARY APPS 2015 Ginger Kadlec: BeAKidsHero Page 5

6 Kik Kik user guidelines specify this app is intended for people aged 17 and older... but tweens and teens are actively using it. In fact, Kik is another commonly used sexting app. Teens often promote their Kik names on Instagram, posting "Kik me at <insert their Kik user ID>". BeWebSmart.com conducted research on this app and found some alarming, pretty standard activity (see example screen shot on right). Much of the content is adult in nature and really is not intended for younger audiences. Kik logo (Source: Technology Guide) BeWebSmart.com reminds parents, "Remember, you don t need a phone to use iphone apps; if your child has an ipod touch or an ipad, they can install iphone apps. Kik is just one of many free texting apps available in the App store." Kik screenshot (Source: BeWebSmart.com) 12 SCARY APPS 2015 Ginger Kadlec: BeAKidsHero Page 6

7 Vine This 6-second video production app is used by many for legitimate purposes, but it also has a dark side. When it was initially launched, Vine was heavily used to distribute pornography. Vine attempted to remove as much porn as they could, but users found a way to get around that by simply changing the hashtags they were using. Terms of service have not changed since 2013, so sexual content and nudity are still permitted on Vine. Pheed One of the fastest growing apps around, Pheed has been touted by Forbes as 'the new Twitter' and Huffington Post as 'the next generation of social media.' With 81% of its user base aged 14 to 25, Pheed is incredibly popular among teens. Its design resembles a Facebook page and its functionality is like Instagram on steroids. Pheed offers live stream broadcast capability and, unlike Vine, doesn't set a time limit for video or audio streaming. Pheed offers parental controls to restrict the channels that can be viewed (users rate their own channels). The good news is Pheed guidelines really do attempt to make it a safer site. Because of its growing popularity, this is a good one for parents to monitor, though. 12 SCARY APPS 2015 Ginger Kadlec: BeAKidsHero Page 7

8 Whisper Known as a secrets app, Whisper allows users to anonymously post secrets they want to share by creating an online poster complete with a graphic underlay and the user s secret in text on top of the image. According to The Atlantic in August 2013, Whisper was getting 2.5 billion page views per month, way more than even a media powerhouse like CNN. Users can remain anonymous and reply either publically or privately to other whispers. Visit the Whisper homepage to get a feel for the type of content on this app much of it is adult in nature. The danger in this app lies in teens engaging in private conversations and sharing personal information with potential predators. It is also has the potential to be a cyberbullying breeding ground. Post Secret Another secrets sharing app, Post Secret allows users to post anonymous secrets on one side of a homemade post card. This app began as a community mail art project and has grown into a hugely popular social media site. According to Youth Trends' February 2008 "Top Ten List Report", Post Secret was the 10th most popular site among female students in the USA (Source: Wikipedia). While some content is benign, much of it is intended for an adult audience (example: see postcard on right). Image source: Whisper.com Image source: PostSecret.com 12 SCARY APPS 2015 Ginger Kadlec: BeAKidsHero Page 8

9 Girls Around Me Sometimes referred to as a stalking app, the super creepy Girls Around Me app uses geolocation technology that connects to other apps (such as Four Square or Facebook) to identify the location of females (or males gender selection is user-specified) in the user s immediate physical area. Tying this back to one of the scary statistics about Internet predators, over 25% of online sexual offenders used their victims social media sites to identify the physical location of those victims. Girls Around Me just makes it that much easier. Pretty scary stuff. Grindr Image source: Cult of Mac Another geolocation app is Grindr. Geared towards gay, bisexual and bi-curious men, this networking app s geolocation capabilities allows users to locate other men that are in close proximity. It shows a grid with photos of users that are in the same geographic area, as well as profiles and the options to chat, share pictures or provide more detail geographic information. Minimum age for use is 18, but youth are fudging their ages and using this app, as well. Image source: Wikipedia 12 SCARY APPS 2015 Ginger Kadlec: BeAKidsHero Page 9

10 Tinder Using information from Facebook profiles, Tinder is yet another geolocation networking app that connects people in close proximity. The danger in these types of apps is that they are used by sexual predators to troll for children, both girls and boys. Image source: Wikipedia Tinder has a minimum age for use of 13-years old. As an added safety precaution, Tinder only allows users to interact with other users in their same age group for youth, that age group is 13 to 17 years old. Tinder relies on data from Facebook to assign users to age groups. The potential danger in this lies in the fact that adult sexual predators can, and in fact do, establish alias Facebook accounts purporting to be minors. of other scary apps? Please share them with me at ginger@gingerkadlec.com. 12 SCARY APPS 2015 Ginger Kadlec: BeAKidsHero Page 10

11 What can parents do? Parents can limit the types of apps their teens download to digital devices via parental control functions on iphone or ipads. Various apps are assigned ratings (source: itunes): 4+ Applications in this category contain no objectionable material. 9+ Applications in this category may contain mild or infrequent occurrences of cartoon, fantasy or realistic violence, and infrequent or mild mature, suggestive, or horror-themed content which may not be suitable for children under the age of Applications in this category may also contain infrequent mild language, frequent or intense cartoon, fantasy or realistic violence, and mild or infrequent mature or suggestive themes, and simulated gambling which may not be suitable for children under the age of You must be at least 17 years old to purchase this application. Applications in this category may also contain frequent and intense offensive language; frequent and intense cartoon, fantasy or realistic violence; and frequent and intense mature, horror, and suggestive themes; plus sexual content, nudity, alcohol, tobacco, and drugs which may not be suitable for children under the age of 17. Image source: BeWebSmart.com BeWebSmart.com offers a simple step-by-step guide to restrict application downloads by rating. These steps should work for Apple products including iphones and ipads. For parental controls on other types of digital devices, please refer to the manufacturers' websites for details and instructions. 12 SCARY APPS 2015 Ginger Kadlec: BeAKidsHero Page 11

12 Parents: be app wise! It may seem daunting, but your teens need YOU to help be sure the apps they use, whether on their own mobile devices or on a friend s computer, are being used in a safe manner. To help keep your teens safe, try these tips: 1. Limit the number of apps they can use. Have your teen select two or three apps they most wish to use. Then, you trust by verify by checking their iphone, computer or other mobile devices to be sure they are abiding by that limitation. 2. Sign a social media contract with your teen. I love this idea! Social media contracts help outline the do s and don ts for both you and your teen. Plus, the act of signing a contract really does add a level of accountability to your teen for their responsible use of technology. You can search the Internet for some good samples of social media contracts to customize and make your own. One resource is Common Sense Media it offers some age-appropriate contracts for kids K-12 check em out at 3. Computers and cell phones belong to YOU, the parent. Did you pay for that piece of technology? Are you paying the monthly service fees? Who is legally responsible for the actions of your child? If you answered yes to even one of these questions, the ultimate decision making power about which apps to use or not to use belongs with YOU, the parent or guardian. It is a privilege, not a right, for your teen to use technology and social media. If your teen abuses the privilege, then the privilege should be revoked and consequently used as a teaching moment to help your teen not make a similar mistake in the future. I offer this information to you as a place to start. Engage. Talk with your teens about Internet and social media safety. If you aren t familiar with an app you find on your teen s iphone or ipad, Google it! Learn as much as you can about the pitfalls and potential dangers of apps your teens are using and discuss with them ways to use those apps safely. 12 SCARY APPS 2015 Ginger Kadlec: BeAKidsHero Page 12

13 For More Information You may also find these online resources helpful: Please don t hesitate to contact me on my website at or ginger@beakidshero.com. I will do my best to find answers for you. Thank You! Special thanks to Hamilton County Sheriff s Department Detective Alex Petty for his input and guidance on the list of apps in this report. Thanks, too, to the various news and social media outlets from whom information was shared as part of this report, including: Pew Research National Center for Missing and Exploited Children Journal of Adolescent Health Enough Is Enough Yoursphere Be Web Smart Softonic Forbes Huffington Post The Atlantic Google Play Technology Guide Cult of Mac Wikipedia itunes Disclaimer: Material presented in this document and on gingerkadlec.com is intended for information purposes only. It is not intended as professional advice and should not be construed as such. Ginger Kadlec: BeAKidsHero does not necessarily sponsor, endorse or otherwise approve of the materials appearing in sites referenced in this report. 12 SCARY APPS 2015 Ginger Kadlec: BeAKidsHero Page 13