5650.Jong-Child.01.src.qxd 5/12/99 10:07 PM Page 1. Section I ANXIETY

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1 5650.Jong-Child.01.src.qxd 5/12/99 10:07 PM Page 1 Section I ANXIETY

2 5650.Jong-Child.01.src.qxd 5/12/99 10:07 PM Page 2 Therapist s Overview AN ANXIOUS STORY GOALS OF THE EXERCISE 1. Externalize the source of the anxiety by putting a face to the anxiety. 2. Reduce the level of anxiety through increasing ability to verbalize thoughts and feelings connected to the anxiety. 3. Increase sense of possibility and hope of dealing with the anxiety. 4. Develop unique outcomes that can be implemented to cope with or resolve the anxiety. ADDITIONAL HOMEWORK THAT MAY BE APPLICABLE TO OVERCOMING ANXIETY Low Self-Esteem Dixie Overcomes Her Fears Page 110 Phobia-Panic/Agoraphobia Maurice Faces His Fear Page 170 Speech/Language Disorders Shauna s Song Page 245 ADDITIONAL PROBLEMS THIS EXERCISE MAY BE MOST USEFUL FOR Phobia-Panic Agoraphobia School Refusal Separation Anxiety Social Phobia/Shyness SUGGESTIONS FOR PROCESSING THIS EXERCISE WITH CLIENT This assignment is based on M. White s and D. Epston s approach of Narrative Means to Therapeutic Ends. For centuries, stories have been a way for children, especially, to deal with difficult issues. It would be best to have the client do this assignment in the therapy session. Creating pictures to go along with the story is to be encouraged. If the client is younger than eight years old, you should assist the child in writing the story by breaking it down and feeding the questions to him/her one by one in a style similar to Gardner s mutual storytelling technique. Allow the client to go where he/she needs to. Once the story is completed, have the client read the story to you. Act it out as much as the client directs you to. Then encourage the client to share the story with parents as a homework assignment. 2

3 5650.Jong-Child.01.src.qxd 5/12/99 10:07 PM Page 3 Exercise I.A AN ANXIOUS STORY Write a short or long story about what makes you feel anxious or nervous. Begin by giving that thing that makes you anxious a name and then describe what it looks like and what it does. Next, tell all the things it does to get at you. (Be specific and use your imagination.) End the story with the way you beat, defeat, or outsmart that thing. You could begin with Once upon a time, or Just the other day, or Every time I start to.... To give you an example of how a story might begin, read the following: Once upon a time there was a young girl who lived with her parents, two brothers, one dog, and one cat in a big house in a quiet neighborhood. The girl was named Nicole. She was seven years old and loved school and playing outside with her friends. However, for the last three months, every time she began playing with her friends outside this ghostlike shadow named Mr. Creep would bother her and scare her by telling her she was going to get bit by a poisonous bug or kidnapped by a stranger. Nothing she tried could keep her from becoming frightened and running inside her house where she felt safe and where Mr. Creep left her alone. It was bad at home but worse at friends houses. Since she stayed home all the time, her friends started to make fun of her and say she was weird. So Nicole tried Write your story in the following space: 3

4 5650.Jong-Child.01.src.qxd 5/12/99 10:07 PM Page 4 Exercise I.A 2. Now that you have completed the story, see if you can come up with another ending in which you beat, defeat, conquer, outsmart, or trick that thing again. Once you have finished the story, share it with your therapist and both of you act it out in your next meeting. 4

5 5650.Jong-Child.01.src.qxd 5/12/99 10:07 PM Page 5 Therapist s Overview FINDING AND LOSING YOUR ANXIETY GOALS OF THE EXERCISE 1. Identify what precipitates the feelings of anxiety. 2. Increase the ability to verbalize thoughts and feelings about what brings on anxiety. 3. Explore options for coping with or resolving the feelings of anxiety. 4. Develop two specific ways to cope with anxious feelings. ADDITIONAL HOMEWORK THAT MAY BE APPLICABLE TO OVERCOMING ANXIETY Low Self-Esteem Dixie Overcomes Her Fears Page 110 Separation Anxiety Explore Your World Page 205 Social Phobia/Shyness Greeting Peers Page 229 ADDITIONAL PROBLEMS THIS EXERCISE MAY BE MOST USEFUL FOR Phobia-Panic/Agoraphobia Separation Anxiety Social Phobia/Shyness SUGGESTIONS FOR PROCESSING THIS EXERCISE WITH CLIENT Anxiety, or nervousness, can often be something that is hard to pin down. It can certainly be seen in children, but getting at the specific cause is difficult and often elusive. Different ages in children can bring different fears which vary in degree depending upon the individual child s makeup, family environment, and the situations life presents. The result is that most anxieties disappear and change with time. The important thing is for children to develop the ability to talk about their anxieties with someone they trust and someone who will take what they have to say seriously. Therefore, do not say that feelings do not make sense or offer some rational explanation as to why it cannot be, instead, it is essential to just listen, accept, and encourage. Acceptance and encouragement of sharing feelings can either help specifically identify what the source of the anxiety is or help reduce the anxiety through desensitization and extinction. 5

6 5650.Jong-Child.01.src.qxd 5/12/99 10:07 PM Page 6 Exercise I.B FINDING AND LOSING YOUR ANXIETY There are many things that can make a person feel anxious or nervous. In order to feel better, it is important to identify exactly what makes you anxious. Find in the following word search these items that can make some of us feel anxious or nervous: Monsters Storms Death Mistakes Fighting Bugs Dark Yelling Divorce Snakes Strangers Noises Arguing Complete the following word search. S T O R M S K R A D R P E V J O S S Y I E R L K F E N T G V T D E A T H A R N O S L U K W R K A I R N P S R G N E N T C O I B U G S S G H E M T I A C E D E G B C N O I S E S R I U G N I L L E Y S F K 1. Name three things that make you feel anxious or nervous

7 5650.Jong-Child.01.src.qxd 5/12/99 10:07 PM Page 7 Exercise I.B 2. Which one of the three makes you feel the most anxious? 3. When you experience this anxious feeling, which of the following things happen to you? (Circle at least one.) Hands sweat Run to a safe place Start talking to anyone who is nearby Get angry Heart beats faster Become short of breath Become fearful Feel physically sick Freeze and do nothing Call for help Try to think or do Try not to let others know something else quick by acting OK Other reactions to feeling anxious are: 4. What have you tried that helps you get over feeling nervous? 5. What has worked the best? 6. Now ask two people that you trust the following questions: A. Do you ever feel anxious? 1. Yes No 2. Yes No B. What makes you anxious? C. How do you handle the anxiety you feel?

8 5650.Jong-Child.01.src.qxd 5/12/99 10:07 PM Page 8 Exercise I.B 7. From the input you received from others or from an idea you have, create another possible way to handle your anxious feelings. 8