Caring Feeling Presence

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3 The Felt Sense A phrase that you will hear used often while talking about Focusing is felt sense. What does it mean? A good way to begin to understand is to imagine an iceberg floating in the sea. You see the tip above the surface and yet you are aware that there is a much larger portion of it beneath the surface. The piece above the surface represents our emotions feelings body sensations that are readily available to us in our awareness. (e.g. throbbing headache, clammy palms, pounding heart, lump in the throat, love, tenderness etc.) In reality our body knows more about an issue that we have in a feeling or emotion or sensation way or can think with our minds. Beneath the surface of the water it s another whole world, a place we don t know much about. Dr. Eugene Gendlin called this the felt-sense. Your body knows things and you know it knows them, but you re not sure of the more of the story. For example you walk into a room and immediately get an uncomfortable feeling in your gut something is up! The people in the room are acting as if everything is fine and when you ask they tell you they are fine. Perhaps your were wrong. Yet later you learn that there had been an argument and someone had stormed out of the house just before you arrived. Your gut didn t lie. You may ask why would I want to spend time with these feelings, especially if the felt-sense seems scary, sad, angry one of the feelings that I may consider bad feelings? It is a common concern that paying attention to our feelings will make them bigger and more intense and even gives them permission to go out of control. We even use negative phrases like don t wallow in your feelings. You will find that just the opposite is the case. Your feelings get bigger and more painful when they aren t allowed to be. We are suggesting that it is wise to pay attention to the whispers of our body rather than making it shout for attention. When feelings are acknowledged, they begin to settle down and tell you about themselves. In this caring relationship of acknowledging and respectful listening, the feelings begin to shift and change. This is something that needs to be experienced to be believed and trusted. Focusing allows us to be down in our bodies in a way that lets them tell the story that s hidden inside but also connects us to the larger world of spirit. The heart of focusing is the awareness that my source of life is within me.. Ann McGlone, 1991 Caring Feeling Presence The Caring Feeling Presence is how we describe an alternate way of being with hurting places inside ourselves. Instead of running from or trying to control them, we look for a body approach that is different from pushing them aside. This isn t a mental operation, like thinking we will be nice to them. It s sensing whether we can find a body-feel of openness, understanding, respect for, or gentleness toward feelings that we routinely ignore or reject. One of the hardest things is finding a positive way to be with difficult feelings inside ourselves. Most of us were never taught how to do this as children. So, we imitated the adults around us who routinely ran away from, numbed, or ignored their real feelings. Sometimes, it helps to place your hand in a caring fashion wherever in your body you feel the pain of some difficult feelings. What you are doing is reestablishing kinship with an alienated, forgotten, neglected or rejected part of yourself. That hurt is you! It has a story to tell. Will you take time to listen? Use whatever approach helps you be a little more open, accepting and friendly toward your body s carrying of your hurt. Perhaps just saying hello to it. Remember to ask yourself: Is it OK to be with this? Never try to bulldoze your way through to such closeness. If it s too scary, back off. Your defenses are there for a reason. Respect them. Then rather than trying to be with the issue that frightens you, be instead with the feeling of how difficult it is even to get near such pain. Can you be a little more open, even gentle with feeling of your resistance to Focusing? The feeling of such resistance is real. It is you! It is a place to start on your journey toward change. Focusing is filled with respect. In never forces you into inappropriate places. That is why it is so important to find your own approach to a caring presence that your body can feel.

4 Five Important Learnings 1. My body knows things as well as my head. 2. How does my body try to tell me what it knows? Through feelings, body-sensations, and things I know, but can t put into words. In Focusing we call these FELT SENSES. 3. My body has its own language through which it wants to talk to me. Whenever I notice feelings, sensations, and felt senses in my body, there is always a story waiting to be told. 4. How do I let my body tell its stories? By learning a special way of caring for, holding, and listening to my body s own language. 5. This special way of owning my body is called FOCUSING. The BioSpiritual Questions: +What is between me and really feeling good and peaceful right now? +What in my body needs my loving, caring presence? +How do I carry this feeling in my body? What is that like? +What Feels like it wants my attention? +Is it OK to be with this? Might I be near it? +If NO, is it OK to be with the NO? + How does the whole thing feel in my body right now? +What does this feeling need? +What might it feel like in Resolution? +Is there more to the story here? The Body s Role in Spiritual Transformation: Rediscovering the Lost Body-Connection within Christian Spirituality The starting point for any path to wholeness is our personal inner journey of growing into communion with ourselves. You are invited to experience a process of inner exploration into your own body s wisdom called BioSpiritual Focusing. This spiritual practice offers opportunities to assist in developing a quality of listening presence both within oneself and with another person. Learning this new way of listening to your body can facilitate spiritual growth, creativity, healthcare, decision making and stress reduction. In developing this into a habit in your body, the hidden depths and breadth of God s Presence can then break through in renewed and often surprising ways. Peter Campbell BSF Founder I didn t realize that all the sadness, fear and hurt that I carried within me was in need of my own listening and kindness. I learned that by being a friend to my most difficult feelings rather than pushing them down, was a pathway into profound healing and release. This journey led me to the place inside my body where God resides, the place of compassion in my heart. This journey led me home to myself. -BioSpiritual Focusing Retreatant +Is there more to this symbol or felt shift? (recycle)

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