GUIDELINES FOR THE CELEBRATION OF INTER FAITH MARRIAGES IN CHURCH

Transcription

1 MISSION AND PUBLIC AFFAIRS DIVISION INTER FAITH CONSULTATIVE GROUP GUIDELINES FOR THE CELEBRATION OF INTER FAITH MARRIAGES IN CHURCH

2 These guidelines are produced by the Mission and Public Affairs Division of the Archbishops Council of the Church of England and are intended primarily to help parish clergy and others who may be asked to officiate at inter faith marriages in the Church of England. More extensive resources exploring pastoral, relational and spiritual dimensions, written from the perspectives of couples themselves involved in inter faith marriages, can be found on the inter faith marriage website, which also includes extensive links to other sites. In an increasing number of situations, clergy in the Church of England are being approached by couples seeking marriage, one of whom is an adherent of a faith other than Christianity. The following guidelines are designed to set out briefly some of the theological, pastoral, liturgical and legal issues which may need to be addressed, particularly where a wedding service is being planned to take place in a Church of England church. We follow the growing custom of referring to such unions as inter faith (rather than mixed faith ) marriages. This does not in itself imply that their celebration will involve multi-faith worship, nor does it presuppose any particular level of religious commitment on the part of either partner. The guidelines do not cover those situations where one of the partners converts to the faith of the other, as such marriages have by definition ceased to be inter faith. THEOLOGICAL CONSIDERATIONS 1. Anglican thinking about marriage emphasises that the theology of marriage is rooted in creation 1. Marriage is common to human life and not exclusive to Christians. Therefore it is better to speak of the Christian doctrine of marriage, rather than Christian marriage. It is not the Church s ceremony, or even the couple s faith, which makes a true marriage, but their consent to a lifelong union of love and fidelity. Marriage is therefore available to all men and women, regardless of faith, and it seems appropriate to celebrate in church that which God offers to all. 2. However, though there may be a Christian understanding of marriage which is applicable to all, regardless of faith, it is not true that all necessarily share that understanding. Islam, for example, explicitly allows the possibility of polygamous marriage, though the Qur ān imposes the conditions of equality of treatment, and some Muslims regard this as a virtual prohibition. It is difficult to justify the marriage in church of someone who clearly intends something quite different from the Christian understanding of marriage. Therefore the marriage of partners of different faiths in church is not appropriate in every circumstance. 3. For Christians marriage is part not only of the order of Creation but also of Redemption, signifying unto us the mystical union that is betwixt Christ and his Church. So the renewed vision of marriage brought about because of Christ is expressed liturgically in explicitly Trinitarian language at the crucial points of the marriage service. This is true of the giving of the ring, the pronouncement of marriage and the blessing which immediately follows. There will therefore be those of other faiths who withdraw from the prospect of a Christian marriage service because they cannot in conscience acknowledge God in a Trinitarian form. 4. Some Christians would raise the question as to whether any person, who is not baptised, can meaningfully participate in such a Christian ceremony. Anglicans of all kinds, expressing themselves in different ways, would see marriage in church as requiring faith in Christ as its essential context. Some Christians view marriage as a sacrament, seeing the pledged relation of husband and wife as a sign of the pledge of love that Christ has for his Church. They 1 See Marriage: A teaching document from the House of Bishops of the Church of England CHP or on the Church of England website 2

3 question whether marriages of those who are not baptised are sacramental. One solution is to presume that some marriages solemnised in church are not in fact sacramental. The Roman Catholic Church has made explicit provision for the marriage in church of people who are not baptised with Roman Catholic partners, and it does not regard such a marriage as a sacrament. It distinguishes between a Roman Catholic marrying a Roman Catholic; a Roman Catholic marrying a baptised Christian of another church; a Roman Catholic marrying a person who is not baptised (who may be of another faith). All three types of marriage may take place in a Roman Catholic church, but the last is not officially regarded as a sacrament. Some would see it as a sacrament for the Roman Catholic partner. 5.. Others would think along different lines, arguing that baptism cannot be the determining factor. It is clearly difficult to discern the sacramental quality of a large number of marriages where both partners are formally baptised. An openness to discuss this with the couple allows them to think about their relationship, how faith fits and how divine love can be mediated through people whether they are Christians or not. The General Synod has affirmed, in debates about marriage law review, its desire to minister to all couples and not to members only. In offering to the world a theology of welcome and a vision of a renewed, redeemed creation, the Church is making available to all comers its understanding of what God has given through creation in marriage. THE PASTORAL JUDGMENT 6. This leaves clergy who receive a request from a couple who wish to embark on inter faith marriage questions about whether he or she can marry them, even though they might be legally entitled to marriage in church. As with any marriage preparation, it is important to meet the couple where they are and to recognise the stage that they have reached in their particular journey, and the direction in which they are heading. The real question is whether they are prepared to move towards a vision of marriage compatible with Christian understanding. Their vows are an intention for the future rather than a contract for the present, and our prayers aim at that growth into spiritual maturity. 7. We believe the minister should look for acceptance of marriage as EXCLUSIVE, forsaking all other ; LIFELONG, so long as ye both shall live ; and involving COMMITMENT, mutual society, help and comfort. 8. The critical question for the marriage of a couple of different faiths in church is whether there is an acceptance of marriage as exclusive, lifelong and involving commitment and an openness to the wider Christian understanding as expressed in the marriage service. We believe that the minister should err, if at all, on the side of generosity, and be particularly careful to weigh the likely effects of discouraging the request. (We have seen that it cannot legally be refused.) It should be remembered that a range of options is open to the couple for example: a civil ceremony followed by a specially devised religious celebration, which might be held either in a church, a place of worship of the other faith, or a third venue; a civil ceremony followed in some sequence by a Christian service of blessing in church and a celebration in a place of worship of the other faith; a marriage conducted according to the rites and ceremonies of the other faith, possibly including some elements to recognise the faith or religious identity of the Christian partner; a marriage conducted in church according to the rites and ceremonies of the Church of England, possibly including some elements to recognise the faith or religious identity of the other partner. 3

4 9. The Notes to the Common Worship Marriage Service state that it is the custom and practice of the Church of England to offer preparation for marriage for couples who are soon to be married as well as to be available for support and counselling in the years to come. Many of these issues as well as those of the pastoral issues of faith, community, culture or ethnic origin, can be explored with the couple using much of the marriage preparation material available. Whether or not a marriage in church is decided on, the minister has a pastoral responsibility to the couple. They need to reach an informed judgment about their decision to marry at all, and the minister can help them consider all the issues involved. 10. Christians involved in inter faith marriages have been exploring issues of faith, conversion, culture, community and ethnic origin and some helpful articles can be found on their website, LITURGICAL CONSIDERATIONS 11. Where there is no prior civil ceremony the entire service (the 1662 service, the Common Worship service or the Series One service) constitutes the rite and ceremony prescribed by law in the Church of England. This means (unlike the position in non-anglican churches, where only certain words are legally required) that any alteration to the service by way of omission of words and phrases could threaten the legal validity of the marriage ceremony. Furthermore, clergy are bound by Canon B 5 only to make alterations to authorized services which are not of substantial importance and are neither contrary to, nor indicative of any departure from, the doctrine of the Church of England in any essential matter. Therefore, although it might be tempting to modify or leave out language and imagery so as to take account of the faith of the non-christian partner, this is not legally an option. 12. One of the particular issues is prayer in the name of the Trinity. It might be suggested that this should be replaced with more general descriptions of God which did not conflict with the understanding of God in other faiths. But even if universally acceptable terms could be found, the difficulty is that the Trinitarian theology is implicit in the service and could not be taken out without losing its Christian character. 13. The most obvious point in the service is perhaps the giving of the ring by the man (or the exchange of rings by both) in the name of the Trinity. Only at this point are either of the couple required actively to say the Trinitarian formula as distinct from acknowledging it on the lips of the minister. However it is not possible to omit this otherwise the service could not be construed as a rite and ceremony of the Church of England. 14. However, additional prayers, hymns and readings, chosen by the minister in consultation with the couple, are commonly added to the authorized service. Although legal as well as theological considerations argue against omissions, additions might be appropriately made such as an additional reading from another scripture or a prayer or blessing in the appropriate language provided none of the material would be contrary to the Christian faith After discussing these issues, the minister may feel it more appropriate to offer a specially devised service in church following a civil ceremony which dealt with the legal aspect. This would give more flexibility about what can be offered because there would not have to be any specified liturgy 3. However it is important to remember that the service would still be an act of Christian worship and again, Canon B 5 requires that none of the material used should be 2 For further guidelines about this see Multi-faith Worship: Questions and suggestions from the Inter Faith Consultative Group CHP 1992 GS Again helpful guidelines are given in the above. 4

5 contrary to, or indicative of any departure from the doctrine of the Church of England in any essential matter. 16. All these issues, and especially what Christians really understand by the Trinity, could be very fruitful elements in a dialogue between minister and couple about the whole meaning of faith and marriage. In the end it must be up to the couple to determine whether, and in what sense, they choose to use and understand one of the Church of England s marriage services. THE LEGAL POSITION 17. The Law of England provides that every person resident in a parish (regardless of nationality) has a right to be married by banns in the parish church according to the rites and ceremonies of the Church of England, whether he or she is baptised or not. The Church of England teaches that marriage is for life. It also recognizes that, sadly, some marriages do fail and, if this should happen, it seeks to be available for all involved. The Church accepts that, in exceptional circumstances, a divorced person may marry again in church during the lifetime of a former spouse. Since July 2002 some clergy are willing to conduct a further marriage in church and it is wise for couples that this applies to, to make an appointment to speak to their parish priest before setting a date. The General Synod has on several occasions affirmed that that there should be no change in the extent of the Church s responsibility to solemnise the marriage of all parishioners who request that ministry. 18. The incumbent or priest-in-charge is not obliged to conduct a marriage himself, though he must arrange for another Anglican minister to do so, and allow the use of the parish church. This may help clergy who experience difficulties of conscience in conducting particular marriages. 19. It should be noted also that, at present, the right to be married in church only applies to marriage by banns. (Both the State and the Church of England are in a process of reviewing their marriage law. However changes are unlikely to take place before 2007). The issue of common licences is a matter entirely at the discretion of the diocesan bishops: the expressed policy of the House of Bishops, at the moment, is to refuse marriage by licence where neither party is baptised, and where only one party is baptised, to require a statement in the application form that the other party does not reject the Christian faith and desires marriage in church. However this is also under review and it is worth checking with the Diocesan registrar. Clergy should be aware that in the case of the marriage of foreign nationals, marriage by banns, though valid in England, may not be regarded as valid in the national's own country, and that his or her embassy may recommend marriage by licence, or a civil ceremony. 20. Often discussion about the marriage in church of people who have not been baptised has focused on those with a background of unbelief rather than other faith. However, on occasions clergy do receive requests for inter faith marriages in church, including some where both partners were adherents of another faith. Society has become more complex in its ethnic and religious composition and requests come, not only from inner city parishes, but also from places where people have moved out of their original community into rural or small town parishes. Given that nearly three million adults (approximately 6% of the UK population) described themselves in the 2001 Census as belonging to a faith other than Christianity, it is likely that the number of such marriages will increase in the future. How should those involved be cared for pastorally and liturgically? Christian judgment will obviously depend upon particular understandings about marriage, about other faiths and about the circumstances and intentions of the couple concerned. 5

6 BRIEF BIBLIOGRAPHY Christian-Muslim Marriages (CSIC Selly Oak Colleges, Research Papers, Muslims in Europe, 20, 1983) C. Lamb, 'Mixed-Faith Marriage: A Case for Care' in R. Hooker & C. Lamb: Love the Stranger (SPCK, 1986) S. Poulter: Asian Traditions and English Law. A Handbook (The Runnymede Trust with Trentham Books, 1990) Church and State (Chadwick Report) 1970 (GS 19) An Honourable Estate, 1988 (GS 801) Marriage: A teaching Document from the House of Bishops of the Church of England CHP 1999 Services of Prayer and Dedication after Civil Marriage, 1985 Report of Proceedings xix, 1 (February 1988) Bishops Conference of England and Wales: Directory Concerning Mixed Marriages, CTS, nd The Roman Catholic Code of Canon Law, 1983 (Canons 1086, ) Multi-faith worship: Questions and suggestions from the Inter faith Consultative Group CHP GS 1011 Approved and revised October 2004 Inter Faith Consultative Group 6