Sleep. As a rough guide, your baby will need between 14 and 16 hours sleep every day, including daytime naps.

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1 Sleep Babies needs sleep not just to rest, but also because it is crucial for their brains and bodies to develop. When they are asleep, babies brains use this time to organise everything that they have learnt during the day. They also produce a hormone that makes them grow while they are asleep. As a rough guide, your baby will need between 14 and 16 hours sleep every day, including daytime naps. It takes around 1 year from conception for a baby's body clock to be the same as ours, with most sleep happening at night. For most children this happens at around 3 months, but if your child was born prematurely, you will need to take that into account. If you are lucky, your baby may start to sleep longer at night between 6-12 weeks, but many babies may be considerably older before they stop needing night feeds. Sometime after about 6 weeks, baby should start to settle and go back to sleep more quickly after their night feed. A useful sign that their body clock is becoming established is that they stop having a dirty nappy in the night. Sleep patterns Sleep can be divided into different stages: Stages 1 and 2 baby falls asleep, but is not in a deep sleep. Stages 3 and 4 baby is in a deep sleep, with slower breathing and heart rate. They are very still and are not easily disturbed. This is the stage where the brain is busy making new connections and growing brain cells at an amazing rate. Stage 5 baby's brain is active and they are dreaming. You may see rapid eye movements under the eyelids and baby may seem restless or may smile or cry out. If you pick baby up now, or make a noise, they would probably wake up. Babies spend more than half their sleep time in stages 1 and 2, which is why they may appear to be waking up after a short time asleep.

2 Encourage a good night s sleep There are several things you can do that will help encourage your baby to have a good night s sleep: Establish a good bedtime routine early on Turn off the television or loud music Always have a quiet wind down time before bed. Once baby is ready to settle in the evening, try to keep to a similar bed time Give your baby a bath, feed and story or song and be consistent Do not rock your baby to sleep in your arms Try to avoid your baby sucking milk to fall asleep put baby down in the cot while still awake, although sleepy. But bear in mind that for the first couple of months, often up to about 3 months old, many babies are unsettled in the evening, may cry a lot, and have difficulty sleeping even though they appear tired. Your baby might want to cluster feed, appearing to need frequent top-up feeds before falling asleep and then waking a few minutes later and seeming hungry again. Some babies may have colic at this time and nothing will settle them for very long. Why won't my baby settle alone? Your baby's most powerful instinct is to survive. Baby knows that this means they need to make sure that you are close by to protect them. For the first 9 months of life, baby was tucked up in your body, always warm, always aware of your heart beat and usually moving gently in the fluid surrounding them. So if you see the world through baby s eyes, being alone in a rather cool, empty space where you don't appear to figure could be a very stressful experience. Bed-sharing Because many babies settle better with their mother, some mums decide to share their bed with their baby. This is your decision to make, but there are some things to be aware of if you bed-share: Make sure baby cannot fall out of bed if they roll. Make sure that baby is not going to get too hot. Having baby sleep on top of your covers with their own separate covers can help with this, and baby does not need a pillow. Never bed-share if you have drunk alcohol, taken drugs or are totally exhausted. You may sleep heavily, and could smother your baby or not be aware if baby gets distressed. Never bed-share if you or your partner smoke as the gases that you breathe out may interfere with the part of baby s brain that controls breathing. This is still a major cause of cot death.

3 Having baby in bed with you may well mean you experience more peaceful nights to start off with. But be aware that baby will become accustomed to this and expect it to continue. As baby grows they may start kicking you or crawling over you, or you may just want your bed back and then you may decide it is time for baby to sleep in a cot. However, if they are older than 3 months they may find this change very difficult and need to be trained to cope with the new experience. Settling alone If your baby is still young, but not happy to settle alone, there are a few things to think about first: Is baby ready for a sleep? Have they had a reasonable time awake? Are they yawning or appearing restless and irritable? Try to give them a wind down time without too much other noise or activity going on. Television or radio may be good company for you, and a lot of people hardly notice it is on, but a baby s brain may not yet be able to filter out such stimulating distractions. Is baby comfortable? Make sure they have a reasonably full tummy, a clean and dry nappy and are warm enough. Spend a few minutes watching baby s behaviour when you put them in their cot. Do they startle and wave their arms around and appear panicky? They may need to be contained by being wrapped firmly in a sheet to calm them and make them feel safe. You will need to check that they do not get too hot like this. You will be able to see if they like their hands up by their face where they can suck their fingers to self-soothe, or if they prefer to have their arms down by their side to reduce the startling behaviour. If you swaddle your baby, please ensure that their lower body is not wrapped too tight; they need to be able to bend their legs up and move their hips freely. Also watch to see if baby may need to grizzle and cry for a while as a way to switch off before settling to sleep, so don't be in a rush to pick them up again immediately. Settling routine for younger baby If your baby is less than six months old, you could try this settling routine: Develop a wind down routine that your baby will soon learn. Keep the room quiet and be calm and quiet yourself. Ensure your baby is ready to sleep and is comfortable (as above). Place baby in their cot, and cover as needed. Leave alone to settle for a while.

4 If they are fussing and unhappy, try sitting close to the cot so they can see you. If baby is still not happy, try resting your hand on their tummy and if that does not work try saying Shhh at the same time. If baby still will not settle, try gently holding their hands together in the middle, near their face. If the crying builds up, you might as well start again with a cuddle and a calm-down. Remember that baby is not deliberately winding you up or playing games with you. You are trying to teach your baby a new way to settle and they may be feeling insecure and stressed by this. If you can respond with your presence and touch then you are meeting a very basic need and your baby will gradually get to understand this and start to feel safe. You will not spoil your baby by being responsive to what they need, but you will be equipping them with new ways of coping with this strange new world. Settling routine for an older baby After 6 months, your baby will be developmentally ready to learn a routine and be able to predict what happens next. A consistent routine will help them to feel secure: Try to start the bedtime routine at the same time every night. Have a quieter hour before bedtime with no television, to avoid over stimulating baby s brain. If this is the time your partner usually gets home, they can still keep things calm by looking at storybooks together, or with some quiet play on the floor. A typical routine could start with a bath, then going near the cot for a feed without returning to the living area, followed by a story or singing, a cuddle and then into the cot and leave. Try to make sure baby is awake but sleepy and relaxed when they go into their cot. Baby may have developed their own way of settling, for example with a dummy, thumb, soft toy or cloth. This is to be encouraged as they will feel more able to cope with stress if they can self-soothe. But if baby needs a dummy, it may be worth thinking about whether they need you to put the dummy in. If that s the case and you allow them to continue using the dummy, you may find yourself being summoned several times a night to give it to them after they have lost it! If baby is not happy to then settle on their own, how does this make you feel? You may feel like they are trying to control you, you may just want your dinner or to spend some time with your partner, or to relax in front of the television in peace. However, it might be worth thinking about what your baby may be feeling if they start to cry and shout for you. What is your baby really saying? They might want to stay

5 where all the action is, or feel that they need you close by to fall asleep. They may fear that you won t return. After 6 months babies may be affected by separation anxiety. They know that they are separate from you but also that they need you to survive. Their thought processes are not yet mature enough to understand that even though you are not there, you are not far away. So what can you do? How do you teach your baby to change from thinking I need you to get me to sleep to I can get to sleep on my own? There are two well-researched methods that work (yes, they really do work!) and will not cause your baby any psychological harm. Controlled crying This method will help your baby to gradually learn that although you respond to them when they call, they will be staying in their cot and will be able to settle to sleep alone. You should not use this technique if your baby is unwell. Settle baby in their cot as in the routine above and leave the room. If baby cries, leave them for a minute or two and then go back. Maybe tuck them in again, but do not look at baby or talk to them, then leave. If baby continues to cry then wait a few minutes before going back in and repeat as above. At this point there are slightly differing views on how long to leave your baby. Some advice suggests increasing the intervals of time between visits. You will know your own baby best and need to work the timing out for yourself, but we would suggest that no more than 5 minutes may be long enough. After all, you will be feeling pretty stressed yourself as all your instincts will be telling you to cuddle your baby and make them stop crying! There really is no point in leaving a baby to cry until they make themselves sick and then need lots of attention to be cleaned up. Try to keep calm and do not raise your voice, even if you feel angry or upset inside. Daddy or another familiar person can share these visits with you. Keep repeating this stage until baby falls asleep. If you give up and cuddle baby to calm them, remember that you are reinforcing their belief that they need you there to fall asleep. Now baby s memory will start to teach them that when it's bedtime or if they wake up in the night, they can fall back to sleep on their own, so this method will help with night waking too. How long it takes to work will depend on your baby s personality, how quickly they learn and how well they cope with change. Some babies will settle in about 20 minutes, others may take up to 3 hours. You may be able to crack it in 2-3 nights, or it may take 2-3 weeks. The trick is to keep going with it. Keep a little diary to show how things are improving each night and find people to support you with it.

6 Gradual withdrawal This method could take longer to work, but may mean less crying and distress for you both. The idea is to settle baby in their cot as above: Sit beside the cot. Some babies need you to have a hand in there to stroke their forehead or rest on their tummy. Try not to look at them, or interact with them, even if they are restless or trying to get your attention. Stay there until they fall asleep. The next night, sit beside the cot, but do not touch baby. Stay until they fall asleep. The next night, move your chair a foot away from the cot, and stay there until they are asleep. Continue to move your chair a little further away each night. You might like to have a book or something to read, as you don't want to interact with your baby. Keep moving your chair until you are in the doorway and then out on the landing and then, all being well, baby will be settling without you being there at all. This may not work if baby gets more distressed and upset that you are there, but that they can't touch you. If that is the case, you may prefer to use the controlled crying method instead. Where can I get help? You can talk to your health visitor about sleep issues and she, or a member of the team, will be able to help you adapt these methods to suit you and your baby and support you through the whole process. There is also a sleep clinic running in Aylesbury and High Wycombe for babies 6 months and older. Ask a member of the team if you can be referred to this if you need more support and advice. Remember that your baby may still need a night feed until well after 6 months, so these methods will not work if they are hungry! Even if your baby is settling alone, there may be episodes of illness or teething when they need more cuddles and reassurance in the night and then you are back to square one! Once baby is better you can start the technique again.

7 Can I do anything about early morning waking? Your baby will be developing a night/day cycle that is right for them. There may be very little you can do to prevent early morning waking. It is certainly worth making sure they have enough coverings to stay warm. A sleeping bag can be useful as babies tend to kick off blankets and sheets. Maintaining a steady temperature in the bedroom can also help, but it doesn t really need to be more than around 18C. Using blackout blinds sometimes helps as babies sleep patterns can be influenced by the amount of light on the back of their eyes. However, their own internal clock is often more powerful. Some babies may settle again after a milk feed, so if it is around 5 am and they have slept for around 10 hours this can sometimes give you another hour or two. If baby is able to sit up and pick things up then putting some books or quiet toys in the cot may keep them occupied for a while, but eventually it will be you that they want. So this may be a time to decide on some survival strategies. Get to bed early yourself, take it in turns to get up early or, if that isn t possible, try to get a lie-in maybe at the weekend. Just remember that this is all very common in the first year. But it will change!