Patricia A. Watts - 1 -

Transcription

1 The 4 th Son By Patricia A. Watts - 1 -

2 The 4 th Son Patricia A Watts tdmkdetroit@sbcglobal.net the4thsonbook@sbcglobal.net COPYRIGHT 2007 by Patricia A Watts Book Design by Patricia A Watts/VBS Publishing Second Printing June, 2009 All rights reserved. No part of this book, including cover design, may be reproduced in any form by any means without prior consent of the publisher, except in the case of brief passages to be printed in a newspaper or magazine. First Trade Paperback Edition Printing September 2007 Printed in the United States of America

3 TABLE OF CONTENTS Introduction The Beginning The Diagnosis What Now? Life Goes On A Good Outlook Helps - Prayer Changes Things The Day He Disappeared Hold Your Head Up Don t Be Ashamed Will My Child Ever Learn The Basics? What s With These Temper Tantrums? From A Mother s Heart Real Men Can Take The Heat A Letter From Keith There s A Rainbow Waiting For You Help For Your Journey Resource Guide Giving Thanks - 3 -

4 INTRODUCTION My name is Pat Watts and I am a devoted wife and the loving mother of four sons. I am the proud grandmother of six. After having the good fortune of bringing three sons into the world with normal challenges, I was blessed to have a fourth son, Keith, who was diagnosed with Autism. The diagnosis came in 1987, and it came without a handbook, without a support system, and without a clue on our part of what to do. Keith is now 23 years old and living a good life. I have a story to tell you about how we got from 1987 to now. I want to encourage the many parents that are just at the beginning of their life s journey that there is so much hope. Look for your angels along the way. This story was born from many tears and much laughter, rough trials and smooth victories, a little pain and so, so much joy. Let s begin

5 The 4 th Son - 5 -

6 In The Beginning This thing called autism was virtually unheard of when I grew up in Detroit, Michigan. In all of my early years I only met one autistic person. She was a little girl that stared off into space. I was 14 at the time and I remember feeling sadness as I watched her. I breathed a sigh of hope that I would never have a child like that. Never in a million years would I have thought I would someday face the same challenges as that family. My fourth son came into this world without much fanfare. He had a little bit of a struggle during birth when his heart rate kept decreasing because of the cord resting around his neck times two. He was also born face up as if he wanted to see what this world was all about. Even though Keith seemed to behave - 6 -

7 pretty much like the rest of the boys did as babies, there was something a little different. Keith was a good baby who really didn t like to be rocked and cuddled too much. He blew bubbles just like all the other babies. He sat up and crawled at the right times. He even said a few words by the time he was one year old. This was all just the beginning of what was to come. We parents were put on this earth to watch out for our children, to nurture them, love them, teach them, and guide them. The key word here is watch. A parent must watch the development of their children very closely. That is the only way you can pick up on any special needs that may occur. Infantile Autism seems to pop up like clockwork when the child reaches about 18 months or so. By the time Keith reached 18 months, I had come to the realization that - 7 -

8 something was very different about this child. Having raised three other boys, I knew something just wasn t right. We noticed that Keith wouldn t look us in the eye anymore. He became a very busy and hyperactive child. He appeared not to hear us when we called him. He was what most parents would call a good baby because he loved to play alone. But this was not normal. I thought about the little girl with the far away eyes just for a second. As we began to be concerned about his behavior, we took him to the doctor. This was the beginning of a part of our lives that was going to take a turn in a totally different direction

9 The Diagnosis When we took Keith to our family physician, at first glance he said he seems OK to me. What s the problem? I pointed out that he wasn t saying words any more, he was very active, and he avoided eye contact with us. At first the doctor was reluctant to acknowledge any of our concerns, but then I told him to look at my child, really look at my child. Look into his eyes the way a parent would. One look into those far away eyes convinced him that we needed to have him evaluated further

10 The first step in helping a child with special needs is to acknowledge that he needs help. Most parents don t want to believe that their child is less than perfect. I am a praying woman and I certainly don t let my faith rest in sickness or disease, but we must never ignore the signs when our children need our help. Just because we may have to face some hurdles in life, it doesn t mean that God is not in the plan. Quite to the contrary. Going through something like dealing with the effects of autism on a loved one ushers in a time when you and your maker will become very close indeed. There are many programs in effect to help diagnose learning disabilities. You may begin with your doctor or with the school system. They have programs in place for early intervention. At the time Keith was diagnosed with autism, there was only one case in 10,000. Something has happened since then and cases