Broken Identity Part One

Transcription

1 Broken Identity Part One Lester Zimmerman This morning I want to talk about a subject that has become very confusing and polarizing in our culture. I want to talk about homosexuality, also referred to as same sex attraction. If you're struggling with this or have gay loved ones, friends, or relatives who struggle with homosexuality, you most likely find this an extremely difficult subject. My desire this morning is not to add to your pain but to give hope and to help us respond to our families and culture with understanding and redemptive grace and truth. I have entitled this two part message series Broken Identity because homosexuality at its core is not about sex but about a person s inner identity. I also chose this title because we are all broken people and on a journey to finding healing from our brokenness and to find our true identity in God. The sin nature we are all born with is that of brokenness and sinfulness. The bible says we all have sinned and fallen short of the glory of God. (Rom 3:23) We are all in the same boat. We are all equally lost without Jesus. Same sex attraction is just one expression of that brokenness. The apostle Paul lists it along with other expressions of brokenness. Read 1 Corinthians 6:9-11 1Co 6:9 Do you not know that the wicked will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived: Neither the sexually immoral nor idolaters nor adulterers nor male prostitutes nor homosexual offenders 1Co 6:10 nor thieves nor the greedy nor drunkards nor slanderers nor swindlers will inherit the kingdom of God. 1Co 6:11 And that is what some of you were. But you were washed, you were sanctified, you were justified in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ and by the Spirit of our God. In this list, homosexuality is in the middle of a host of other sins. This tells me it is not worse than others. We are all on this list. We are all broken sinners. But just like we do not try to normalize adultery, stealing or drunkenness neither should we try to normalize homosexual behavior. In verse 11 Paul gives hope to our sinful behaviors and addictions. He says that we can be set free through Jesus and the power of the Holy Spirit. He says - That is what some of you were Janet E. Smith, Thomas Aquinas on Homosexuality, Homosexuality and American Public Life Original sin alone makes every human being disordered; homosexuality is simply one more of those disordered conditions [in which] God s grace is available to assist us in being healed and in avoiding sinful behavior.

2 We have two extremes in the church today. Some churches are compromising truth in their desire to extend grace and some churches in a reactionary way show little grace to those struggling with homosexuality. Both are wrong! We need both grace and truth! If you are struggling with same sex attraction I hope you feel Petra is a safe place to find healing. In this two part series I will lay out a biblical understanding, possible causes and how to walk with those trying to find healing for same sex attraction. I hope I can do it in a way that enables us to come along side those caught in this struggle in a helpful loving way. The term homosexual, same sex attraction or gay covers a variety of same sex orientations. Lesbianism is used more specifically to refer to women with homosexual behavior. Then there are bisexual and transgender people and various other expression of homosexual behavior. The confusion in our culture has reached the point where the emphasis has shifted from being born male or female to where we now get to choose our sexual identity and we are encouraged to experiment with both genders to discover which we like the best. Studies show that only a small minority struggle with homosexuality. Less than 3% of men and less than 2 % are women Even though this is a small minority there is a huge push and agenda to normalize homosexuality in our culture. It makes it seem like a large part of the population is gay. Our starting point for this discussion is important. Because where you start sets the direction for where you will end up. For Christians our starting point must always be the authority of God s inspired scripture. Not culture, orientation, or personal desires. Moral issues must never be defined by the culture we live in. For instance, just because our culture has decided that abortion is legal does not make it morally right. It is sin because God s word says it is sin. Our starting point as followers of Jesus is to submit to the Lordship of Jesus in every area of our lives. I might like the high from drugs or pornography or pre-marital sex or same sex but because Jesus is my Lord I submit my feelings, my needs, desires and behavior to him. God s word reveals God s will and is the final authority in our lives. So let s begin with what God tell us in his word about homosexuality. 1. The clear reading of scripture shows that homosexual behavior is morally wrong and sinful in God s sight. Whenever the bible, in the Old or New Testament, refers to homosexual behavior it always refers to it as sinful and wrong. The civil and ceremonial laws of the Old Testament have been discontinued but the moral law continues into the New Testament and is reaffirmed for us today.

3 Leviticus 18:22 Do not lie with a man as one lies with a woman; that is detestable. Romans 1:24-27 Ro 1:24 Therefore God gave them over in the sinful desires of their hearts to sexual impurity for the degrading of their bodies with one another. Ro 1:25 They exchanged the truth of God for a lie, and worshiped and served created things rather than the Creator who is forever praised. Amen. Ro 1:26 Because of this, God gave them over to shameful lusts. Even their women exchanged natural relations for unnatural ones. Ro 1:27 In the same way the men also abandoned natural relations with women and were inflamed with lust for one another. Men committed indecent acts with other men, and received in themselves the due penalty for their perversion. The bible clearly states that homosexual behavior is a perversion of God s creation and plan for sexual intimacy. Our culture has changed perversion into personhood. There are some Christian groups that try to twist the plain meaning of scripture to say that the bible approves of homosexuality and gay marriage as long as the two remain faithful to each other. Clearly that is not what the bible teaches and even pro gay scholars agree that the bible plainly teaches against homosexuality. They just reject the bible outright or don t believe it applies to today s culture. Dr. E. Daniel Martin Homosexuality is sin. A plain and contextual reading of the Bible leaves no doubt that homosexual behavior is sin and such a sin that it especially exemplifies the spiritual confusion and moral depravity of fallen man. 2. God created clear gender and sexual distinction in the beginning establishing heterosexuality as the normative direction for sexual impulse, behavior and marriage. In the beginning God created them male and female and brought them together into a covenant relationship where they became one flesh. God created sex for procreation and pleasure in the unity and oneness of heterosexual marriage. Sex is a good thing. And to protect this good thing God said that any sexual activity outside of the marriage between a man and a woman whether pre-marital sex, adultery or homosexuality is outside of God s set boundaries and is sin. Jesus said even lust in our heart toward another person is sin. Sexual sin is not just a behavior issue but also a heart issue. We need to deal with the issues of our heart, not just control our behavior. Whenever we violate God s moral law it brings pain and judgment into our lives.

4 Larry Bishop and Eric Pement nowhere in the Scripture is there any evidence that homosexual relations receive the same blessing or can possess an equivalent intimacy or sanction as heterosexual relations. Passages indicating God s approval of this form of sexuality are not to be found. 3. Jesus affirmed God s design for marriage to be between a man and a woman. Some people say Jesus didn t condemn homosexuality. This is really a poor argument. By affirming God s design for marriage as being between one man and one woman he did clearly state the norm for sexuality which does not include homosexuality or gay marriage. Jesus stated clearly that God s plan and design is for a male and female to come together in marriage and become one flesh. Jesus defines sex as a male and female behavior. Mt 19:4-5 Haven t you read, he replied, that at the beginning the Creator made them male and female, and said, For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh? Also, as Christians we believe the entire bible is equally inspired of God, not just the four gospels and saying of Jesus. There are a lot of things Jesus didn t specifically address such pedophilia, and bestiality that the rest of the bible clarifies for us. 4. It is a myth that people are born gay. There is no gay gene. There is no scientific proof for the argument that homosexuals are born gay. Of all the studies that have been done they have not found a gay gene. Those that promote the idea of being born gay do so because of a gay agenda and not on a scientific basis. Even pro gay scientists agree that there is no clear evidence that people are born gay. Let me be very clear. If you are struggling with same sex attraction you were not born this way and you are not predestined to be gay. There is no gene that makes you gay. Anyone who says that is either lying or confused by those with an agenda. So do genes play any part in it at all? Genes do contribute to factors that in turn could predispose an individual to a given behavior, but this is not the same as saying there is a gay gene. Biology may play a role but it is overshadowed by social, cultural and psychological factors. Homosexuality is complicated and has many causes. American Psychological Association booklet (A very liberal pro-gay organization) There is no consensus among scientists about the exact reasons that an individual develops a heterosexual, bisexual, gay or lesbian orientation. Although much research has examined the possible genetic, hormonal, developmental, social, and cultural influences on sexual orientation, no findings have emerged that permit scientists to conclude that sexual orientation is determined by any particular facto or factors. Many think that nature and nurture both play complex roles.

5 Masters and Johnson, the most widely known authorities in the field of human sexual behavior, wrote: The genetic theory of homosexuality has been generally discarded today. Despite the interest in possible hormone mechanisms in the origin of homosexuality, no serious scientist today suggests that a simple cause-effect relationship applies. Even if they found a gay gene it would not change God s moral law. People have all kinds of genetic dispositions toward things that are sinful such as pedophilia, bestiality, necrophilia, kleptophilia. People have genetic orientation toward alcoholism, violence, depression. We are all born with a sin nature and oriented toward sin. We are still called to live by God s moral law. 5. Just because you had a sexual encounter with the same sex or have same sex attraction at times does not mean you are gay. Sometimes people have these feelings and experiences. Whether it was sexual experimentation as an adolescent or as a teen or molestation that stirred up confusing feelings - it does not mean you are gay. The culture is trying to squeeze you into it mold by defining your sexuality for you. There are lots of stories of young people who experimented as kids with some of this sinful behavior and went on to live healthy heterosexual lives. -Dr. E. Daniel Martin We too easily buy into the labels and make them the definition of who we are. A confused adolescent boy has had same-gender sex play. Now he becomes sexually aroused around other boys. Does he ignore it because he s male? Well, there s this category of sexual orientation called gay. So he says, OK, I m gay! The label creates the reality ; the boy takes on a homosexual identity. But the truth is that we are all human beings subject to a wide range of impulses and desires. And many of those desires shape us in ways that don t look like what God intended for us. It is irresponsible to offer gay affirmative counseling to teens on the grounds that homosexual orientation is intrinsic and fixed because it clearly is not. However, the ongoing choices you make will create either a confused sexuality or a healthy sexuality. So choice is involved at some level where you decide what behavior you will follow. Next week we will explore this further and see that same sex attraction for most people is not a choice but engaging in homosexual behavior is clearly a choice. At some point you choose between right and wrong behavior. Repeated behavior creates an orientation after awhile. We become oriented to what we repeatedly give our hearts to and this can feel second nature and natural after awhile. As fallen humans we all have a sin orientation that we need to deal with.

6 The good news is God forgives, cleanses and restores all sinners no matter what our sinful orientation is. He loves us all the same. Repentance is leaving a host of behaviors and intents of the heart. 6. Same sex attraction in itself is not sin. Same sex attraction is part of humanities brokenness just as we all have areas of our life that are broken and need God s healing touch. Same sex attraction is brokenness of the soul. We can be struggling with brokenness without giving into that brokenness and sinning. Another way of saying it is - temptation or predispositions toward sin in itself is not sin. It is when we give into the temptation or desire that it becomes sin. Jas 1:15.after desire has conceived, it gives birth to sin; and sin, when it is full-grown, gives birth to death. Hebrews 4:15 Jesus was tempted but was without sin. But it is also important to understand that in the bible, sin is listed as both a heart issue and behavior issue. When my heart begins to lust after another with sexual fantasies or when I begin to act on those desires it becomes sin. Lust of the mind and heart is as sinful as the behavior. The bible does not condemn you because you struggle with same sex attraction. In fact we welcome you and want to walk with you. The important key is whether you are seeking God s help and healing to overcome your struggle, instead of justifying and rationalizing your desires. We need to work at the root causes of same sex attraction as well as other sinful behaviors, not just manage them. Many people have a predisposition toward certain behaviors but instead of giving into these urges we bring our brokenness to God and through his grace and Christian counseling we walk in victory. There is a difference between predisposition and what we choose to do with it. Conclusion: Next week we will explore some of the causes of same sex orientation. We will see that they are varied and different from person to person. We will talk about how change is possible and how we as a church family can support and walk with people through the process of change. We will explore the importance of our identity when it comes to overcoming same sex attraction. As we look at same sex attraction and various behaviors we struggle with - it all keeps coming back to our broken identity. We need to find our identity in Christ and not in our brokenness.

7 The world says your behavior defines your identity. God says let me define your identity as my son or daughter. We need God to remind us who we truly are. Closing Video Song Remind Me Who I Am by Jason Grey Need to talk? There is help for those struggling and for family members. Contact one of our counselors and they will help you get connected to the resources that are available. Blessing: May God s word be a light and guide to your path May Jesus be your sure foundation as the foundations of our world shift and crumble around us May you hold firmly to grace and truth May you know you are his beloved