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1 Introduction of today s Lesson: Sunday Church School Lesson, 5/28/2006 Living Out Wisdom as a Godly Woman Lesson: Proverbs 31:8-14, Background Scriptures: Proverbs 31 Place: In Jerusalem around 950 B.C. There is no question but that the household and family life reflected in the book of Proverbs is quite different from what we see in the modern, industrialized world. Our world of machines has made many household tasks quicker and simpler. In the ancient household, meal preparation was ongoing, almost throughout the day. Such preparations could require a trip to the market for items such as oil or meat. The household garden which provided produce and spices had to be tended. Preparations also required the frequent baking of bread, perhaps made from flour that had been ground at the village mill or by hand. Cooking was done using an open fire, and this required constant procurement of adequate fuel. Water had to be toted from the well, whether for drinking or for washing. Other household tasks were repetitive and numerous. The idea of a woman having a job or career outside the home would have seemed impossible. There was no time! In ancient times, the women worked hard from dawn until dusk just keeping their households functioning. Our modern day industrial world may have eliminated some of the work involved in managing a household. Yet this same world of conveniences has brought unto women new pressures that were undreamed of in the ancient world. Women in ancient times were not confronted with all the stresses of employment. Their children were less independent and less likely to be corrupted by bad influences outside the home. Divorce in the ancient world was uncommon. Even less common would have been the stresses of a blended household, where children from two families are brought together and expected to get along. Proverbs 31 was not written by King Solomon, but rather by King Lemuel. In fact Proverbs 31:1 indicates that Lemuel s mother is the original source for this chapter. The name Lemuel means one devoted to God. Outside of his name, we know nothing about this king. Some have suggested that Lemuel may be a nickname for Solomon himself, since he was characterized by his devotion to God early in life. If this is true, then the mother mentioned in Proverbs 31:1 was Bathsheba. At any rate, it is amazing to see that the mother of the king knew the value of a woman who managed the household well. Even at the royal, wealthy level where there are many servants there was a need for a faithful wife and mother. Such a person was to be honored.

2 Lesson Aims: After this lesson, students should be able to: 1. Describe the Old Testament ideal for wives and mothers. 2. Explain why principles of justice and character are best learned first in the home. 3. Write a thank-you letter to a woman who has been a godly influence in your life. Golden Text Favour is deceitful, and beauty is vain: but a woman that feareth the Lord, she shall be praised (Proverbs 31:30) I. The Instruction of King Lemuel (Proverbs 31:8-9) A. The instruction of King Lemuel (Proverbs 31:8-9) Open thy mouth for the dumb in the cause of all such as are appointed to destruction. Open thy mouth, judge righteously, and pled the cause of the poor and needy. In these verses of Proverbs, Lemuel is reflecting on the qualities of his mother. So in these verses, it appears that this woman is a good example of the godly woman talked about in the next section of Proverbs. Lemuel thought highly enough of her to remember her counsel. Our lesson text, then, provides a good example of how a godly woman benefits her family. She offers important instruction for living an upright life. In Lemuel s case, his apparently lofty position meant it was especially important that he be compassionate and just. The dumb referred to in verse 8 is not physically unable to speak. Rather, they are the poor and downtrodden who are not allowed a voice of their own. Lemuel was to be their spokesman and represent their best interests. He was to protect them from injustice. The Bible has much to say about the mistreatment of the poor. It was incumbent on a king to play an active role in protecting the poor and downtrodden. This is what the Messiah Himself would one day do (Psalm 72:4). This is why Lemuel s mother urged him again to speak up for the rights of the poor. He was to take up the role of both judge and advocate for the downtrodden. Cases for judgment would often be brought before a king (1 st Kings 3:16-28). Lemuel was 2

3 urged to show no favoritism if there was a dispute between a rich person and a poor person; and yet he was also to take up the cause of the poor to plead for them if the situation called for it. II. The Worth of a Godly Woman (Proverbs 31:10-14) A. Her worth exceeds great riches (Proverbs 31:10) Who can find a virtuous woman? For her price is far above rubies. Most Bible scholars believe that this famous passage is a separate section, not connected with the words of Lemuel but with a man called Agur. Proverbs begins with wisdom, personified as a woman, crying out for followers. A recurring theme of the book is the heartache caused by sinful women. In chapter 31, we have the virtual embodiment of wisdom and godliness. We can all learn much from this woman s example. The woman referred to is, more specifically, a wife. This is one of the many places in which the Bible calls attention to the importance of the family. A bad marriage can be a source of great trouble; but when a union is blessed by godly people, its rewards are many. There are peo9ple who would trade many riches for peace and harmony in their homes. The passage does not just say that a good wife is more valuable than rubies. She is, in fact, far more valuable. The man with such a wife is wealthy indeed. B. Her worth benefits her husband (Proverbs 31:11-12) The heart of her husband doth safely trust in her, so that he shall have no need of spoil. She will do him good and not evil all the days of her life. There is so much deceit in the world. How precious it is to have a relationship with someone whose character inspires complete confidence! This is truly what God intended when He created Eve, but sin had made such relationships of restful trust less common. Mention of the heart indicates that this relationship involves the emotions and affections, not just the head. Such companionship in an often lonely world is priceless. It is an island of rest in the midst of turmoil. Some people bring nothing but heartbreak to the people who love them. Their poor decisions and errant conduct damage their families. The blessed husband need not fear any of this from the virtuous wife. She does not bring evil into her family but rather great good. And it is a goodness that will not end this side of heaven but will continue all the days of her life (verse 12). 3

4 C. Her worth involves great industry (Proverbs 31:13-14) She seeketh wool, and flax, and worketh willingly with her hands. She is like the merchants ships; she bringeth her food from afar. Perhaps the most striking feature in the description of the virtuous wife is how hardworking she is. The description of her labor begins by noting that she seeketh, or selects, wool and flax. Implied here is that good judgment is called for in picking the right raw materials. The women of ancient times had no shopping malls in which to buy their family s clothing. Most women had to make it themselves. The godly woman showed her love for her family by taking care in the materials she chose. She then went about making the clothing with great industry. She was not afraid to do manual labor, even going so far as to make clothing to sell for her family s benefit (vs. 24). III. The Esteem for a Godly Woman (Proverbs 31:25-30) A. Prompted by her character (Proverbs 31:25-26) Strength and honour are her clothing; and she shall rejoice in time to come. She openeth her mouth with wisdom; and her tongue is the law of kindness. Verses 15 through 24 further describe the busy life of a virtuous woman. She prepares food, buys land, works into the wee hours of the night, and helps the poor. Her work proves the lie to anyone that claims that women are not important to the life of society or that they should not take the lead in solving problems or helping the family economically. The Apostle Peter instructs the men among us to treat our wives with consideration as the weaker vessel (1 st Peter 3:7). But from Proverbs we gather that this weakness does not refer to weakness of spirit or resolve! Because of her diligence, this woman is well fortified for any circumstances that may occur. The honor that the woman has comes from her elevation above that which is low, little, common, a state in which they remain who propose to themselves no high aim after which they strive with all their might This does not mean that she is proud. Rather, she possesses the calm nobility that is the product of wisdom and foresight. Because she speaks wisely, her words will benefit her listeners. She will instruct people in the way they should live because she desires their welfare. Her husband and children will benefit from her counsel, and so will everyone else in her circle of acquaintances that is wise enough to listen to her. The godly woman s words reflect the law of kindness (vs. 26) because they are always beneficial. The phrase also implies that they are offered in a humble and gentle spirit, without the pride that marks so much worldly wisdom. Finally, this phrase indicates that a woman of wisdom will teach the importance of kindness. A 4

5 wise person recognizes human frailty (Psalm 103:14) and our constant need for grace. B. Prompted by her actions (Proverbs 31:27) She looketh well to the ways of her household, and eateth not the bread of idleness. A godly woman pays careful attention to how her household operates. The woman of this passage has oversight responsibilities. Her eyes are turned everywhere; she is at one time here, at another there, to look after all with her own eyes. After all the description of her many activities, it is indeed quite obvious that she eateth not the bread of idleness. This expression may seem ironic, since idleness often results in a lack of food (19:15). But the wealthy, if they so desire, can spend their time lying around and overindulging in food and drink. Some eat and drink because they can find themselves nothing else to do. This is certainly not the case with the virtuous woman. C. Given by her whole family (Proverbs 31:28-29) Her children arise and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praiseth her. Many daughters have done virtuously, but thou excellest them all. Everyone in the virtuous woman s family is grateful for her. They are eager to testify to her worth. The godly woman s children call her blessed (verse 28), meaning she is a source of blessing or that she herself has reaped good fruit from her character. Her diligence has secured for her an honored place in the home. The term also emphasizes her good character. By the very nature of who she is, it is evident that she is blessed. Verse 29 is probably the content of the husband s praise. This would explain why a particular woman is singled out here in a passage dedicated to all virtuous women. The grateful husband will concentrate his attention on his wife s excellence. Although many women do wonderful things and conduct their lives in charitable ways, the virtuous woman does things to benefit her children and her husband and those around here within her household. D. Summed up in memorable fashion (Proverbs 31:30) Favour is deceitful, and beauty is vain: but a woman that feareth the LORD, she shall be praised. This verse describes the essence of what sets apart a virtuous woman from others. There is nothing sinful in charm ( favour ) or physical beauty. Both are gifts from God and should cause us to give praise to the Creator. But they will not last. The charm referred to 5

6 is more the superficial winsomeness that is often connected with outward appearance. Such charm is deceitful because it disappears when physical beauty fades. A beautiful woman will no doubt receive many compliments, but it is the godly woman who is really deserving of praise. Long after outward beauty fades, the inner beauty of a godly character will remain and continue to bear much fruit. The book of Proverbs early on informs us that the fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom (1:7). Here at the end of the book we learn that the fear of the Lord lies at the heart of a godly woman s inner beauty. Her worth comes from God. General Comments and Conclusions: God requires us to speak out against injustice and protect those who are vulnerable to oppression and exploitation (proverbs 31:8-9). A wife has a prestigious position; and she holds generations in her hands. (vs ) A good wife is her family s greatest treasure (vs ). A good wife is a pillar of strength, mercy, and order (vs ). Though physical beauty and charm may pass away, a good wife s inner beauty and charm will increase as the years go by (vs. 30). Little is known about Lemuel except that he was a king who received wise teachings from his mother. His name means devoted to God. It is believed that Lemuel and Agur were both from the Kingdom of Massa in northern Arabia. Drunkenness might be understandable among dying people in great pain, but it is inexcusable for national leaders. Alcohol clouds the mind and can lead to injustice and poor decisions. Leaders have better things to do than anesthetize themselves with alcohol. Proverbs has a lot to say about women. How fitting that the book ends with a picture of one who excellest them all a woman of strong character, great wisdom, many skills, and great compassion. Some people have the mistaken idea that the ideal woman in the Bible is retiring, servile, and entirely domestic. Not so! This woman is an excellent wife and mother. She is also a manufacturer, importer, manager, realtor, farmer, seamstress, upholsterer, and merchant. Her strength and dignity do not come from her amazing achievements, however. They are a result of her reverence for God. In our society where physical appearance counts for so much, it may surprise us to realize that her appearance is never mentioned. Her attractiveness comes entirely from her character. The woman described in this chapter has outstanding abilities. Her family s social position is high. In fact, she may not be one woman at all she may be a composite portrait of ideal womanhood. Do not see her as a model to imitate in every detail; your days ware not long enough to do everything she does! Se here instead as an inspiration to be all you can be. We can t be just like her, but we can learn from her industry, integrity, and resourcefulness. 6

7 The book of Proverbs begins with the command to trust and reverence the Lord (1:7), and ends with the picture of a woman who fulfills this command. Her qualities are mentioned throughout the book; hard work, fear of God, respect for spouse, foresight, encouragement, care for others, concern for the poor, wisdom in handling money. These qualities, when coupled with fear of God, lead to enjoyment, success, honor, and worth. Proverbs is very practical to our day because it shows us how to become wise, make good decisions, and live according to God s ideal. Key People King Solomon wrote most of the Proverbs. Solomon was David s son. His mother was Bathsheba. The Davidic Covenant went from David to Solomon. David told Solomon to build the temple; and David challenged him to know and serve God, to be strong and courageous, to be fearless, and to complete his task because God will be with him (1 Chronicles 22, 23, 28, 29). Solomon achieved great successes and great failures. He wrote Proverbs, Ecclesiastes, and Song of Solomon. He finally realized that the only way to live was to fear God and keep his commandments (Ecclesiastes 12:13). Agur, the son of Jakeh, is unknown (30:1) Lemuel, the king. Rabbinic commentators say he is Solomon, others identify him with Hezekiah, and some say with a petty Arabian prince (31:1-9). Lessons for Us Today o Successful life begins and progresses with a right relationship with God, called in Proverbs fear of the Lord. Because mankind was created in God s image, nothing else will bring the temporal and eternal honor to God and satisfaction to mankind. o Learn God s word and use God s word and you will gain wisdom for successful living in God s world. o The organized life is one centered on God and God s word. Proverbs repeatedly urges a person to prepare for one s life, to organize one s life, to diligently pursue life, and do one s best. o Parents are responsible to properly teach, to instill good character, and to train their children about God, treating other people with respect and manners, morality, working hard at whatever one does, proper use of the tongue, avoiding the wrong people, and many others. o A wife and mother has the great responsibility and wonderful opportunities to bless her husband, children and others, both in and out of the home. She counsels her children and make sure they avoid unclean-ness and drunkenness and speak out for the poor and dedicate time to help support the poor. 7

8 Questions from the Lesson: 1. Whose teaching was King Lemuel communicating? 2. What kingly responsibility is emphasized in Proverbs 31:8-9? 3. Why is it appropriate that Proverbs ends with the passage on the virtuous woman? 4. What does it mean that the husband of a virtuous woman has no need of spoil (vs. 11)? 5. What is perhaps the most striking characteristic of the godly woman? 6. How is what the godly woman does a reflection of who she is? 7. How does the virtuous woman s speech reveal her godliness? 8. What is the law of kindness (vs. 26) the godly woman follows? 9. Why do a godly woman s children call her blessed (vs. 28)? 10. Why is feminine charm called deceitful (vs. 30)? John Wesley s Explanatory Notes of Proverbs chapter 31 An exhortation to Lemuel, ver A description of good wife, ver Lemuel - Of Solomon, by the general consent both of Jewish and Christian writers; this name signifies one from God, or belonging to God, and such an one was Solomon eminently, being given by God to David and Bathsheba, as a pledge of his reconciliation to them after their repentance. Possibly his mother gave him this name to mind him of his great obligations to God, and of the justice of his devoting himself to God's service. 2 What - A short speech, arguing her great passion for him; what words shall I take? What counsels shall I give thee? My heart is full, but where shall I begin? Of my womb - My son, not by adoption, but whom I bare in the womb, and therefore it is my duty to give thee admonitions, and thine to receive them. My vows - On whose behalf I have made many prayers and sacrifices, and solemn vows to God; whom I have, as far as in me lay, devoted to the work, and service, and glory of God. 3 Strength - The vigor of thy mind and body. Ways - Thy conversation, repeated in other words. 4 To drink - To excess. 6 To perish - To faint; for such need a cordial. 8 The dumb - For such as cannot speak in their own cause, either through ignorance, or because of the dread of their more potent adversaries. Destruction - Who, without such succor from the judges, are like to be utterly ruined. 10 A virtuous woman - Here he lays down several qualifications of an excellent wife, which are delivered in alphabetical order, each verse beginning with a several letter of the Hebrew alphabet. 11 No need - He shall have no need to use indirect courses to get wealth. 13 Flax - That she may find employment for her servants. Worketh - She encourages them to work by her example; which was a common practice among princesses in those first ages. Not that it is the duty of kings and queens to use manual operations but it is the duty of all 8

9 persons, the greatest not excepted, to improve all their talents, and particularly their time, which is one of the noblest of them, to the service of that God to whom they must give an account, and to the good of that community to which they are related. 14 From afar - By the sale of her home - spun commodities she purchases the choicest goods which come from far countries. 15 Giveth - Distributes all necessary provisions. 16 Considereth - Whether it be fit for her use. The fruit - With the effects of her diligence. Planteth - She improves the land to the best advantage. 17 Girdeth - She uses great diligence and expedition in her employment; for which end, men in those times used to gird up their long and loose garments about their loins. Strengtheneth - Puts forth her utmost strength in her business. 18 Perceiveth - She finds great comfort in her labors. Her candle - Which is not to be taken strictly, but only signifies her unwearied care and industry. 19 She layeth - By her own example she provokes her servants to labor. And although in these latter and more delicate times, such mean employments are grown out of fashion among great persons, yet they were not so in former ages, neither in other countries, nor in this land; whence all women unmarried unto this day are called in the language of our law, Spinsters. 21 Not afraid - Of any injuries of the weather. Are clothed - She hath provided enough, not only for their necessity, but also for their delight and ornament. 22 Tapestry - For the furniture of her house. Silk - Which was agreeable to her high quality. 23 It known - Observed and respected, not only for his own worth, but for his wife's sake. Sitteth - In counsel or judgment. 24 Girdles - Curiously wrought of linen, and gold, or other precious materials. 25 Strength - Strength of mind, magnanimity, courage, activity. Her clothing - Her ornament and glory. Rejoice - She lives in constant tranquility of mind, from a just confidence in God's gracious providence. 26 Openeth her mouth - She is neither sullenly silent, nor full of impertinent talk, but speaks discreetly and piously, as occasion offers. In her tongue - Her speeches are guided by wisdom and grace, and not by inordinate passions. And this practice is called a law in her tongue, because it is constant and customary, and proceeds from an inward and powerful principle of true wisdom. 27 Looketh well - She diligently observes the management of her domestic business, and the whole carriage of her children and servants. 30 Favor - Comeliness, which commonly gives women favor with those who behold them. Deceitful - It gives a false representation of the person, being often a cover to a deformed soul; it does not give a man that satisfaction, which at first he promised to himself from it; and it is soon lost, not only by death, but by many diseases and contingencies. 31 Give her - It is but just, that she should enjoy those praises which her labors deserve. Let her works - If men be silent, the lasting effects of her prudence and diligence will trumpet forth her praises. In the gates - In the most public and solemn assemblies. 9

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