100 Leading Ideas For Maintaining A Godly Marriage (By Bishop Harvey & Mother Lewis)

Transcription

1 100 Leading Ideas For Maintaining A Godly Marriage (By Bishop Harvey & Mother Lewis) Attitude: Make sure your roles as husband and wife are shaped by Biblical guidelines, not by society or friends. 1 Corinthians 11:3/Ephesians 5:22 25 Success in marriage is more than finding the right person; it s becoming the right person. 1 Timothy 6:11 Create an atmosphere in the relationship where the spouse would want to stay, as opposed to having to stay. Ephesians 4:29 32/5:22 If you want a life mate who loves to be around you, all you need to do is love to be around. Deuteronomy 24:5 Be cheerful. Keep the corners of your mouth turned up. Psalms 126:2 A spouse represents your other self; therefore, love your spouse as you love yourself. Ephesians 5:29 A spouse that is wrapped up in him/herself makes a very small package. Proverbs 18:2 Blessed is the spouse who can give without remembering, and take without forgetting. 2 Corinthians 9:7/Luke 6:38 Remember that there is something more important than the package the person. Genesis 2:22 Enjoy your own spouse without comparing him/her with anyone else. Genesis 2:23 Accept your spouse as he/she is, not as a building project.

2 Esther 1:10 22 Give your spouse the benefit of the doubt. Ascribe good motives to your spouse s actions until you find out differently. John 7:24/Romans 14:19 Be sensitive to the dreams of your spouse. Galatians 6:2 Whether in ministry or marriage, being included is a good feeling. Mark 5:35 43 Don t be over dependent, I can t live without you; nor under dependent, I don t need you; but be inter dependent, I enjoy being me, and being with you. Ecclesiastes 5:21 Spouses are lonely because they build walls instead of bridges. Ecclesiastes 4:9 12 Apathy should never enter your relationship no matter how long you have been together. Romans 13:8 As your spouse gets older, remember that so are you. Psalms 90:10 11 Bonding Keep your priorities straight: God first, spouse second, other last. (Next to God, your spouse is first.) Matthew 19:5/Genesis 2:24/Mark 10:7 Keep Christ at the center of your marriage. Neither husband nor wife should take center place. Proverbs 3:6 Cherish your marriage vows. Malachi 2:16 Always remember that love is a commitment, not a mere emotion.

3 John 14:14, 21/Ruth 1:16 Loyalty is an issue of the heart. Proverbs 23:7/Esther 4:13 17 Remember archives are kept in heaven on how well we keep our marriage vows on earth. Romans 14:12 Reaffirm your love for your spouse, and your commitment to God and marriage often. Psalms 119: Be willing to die for your mate. Ephesians 5:25/1 Timothy 5:8 Good relationships are not based on the 50/50 principle you both must be willing to go all the way all of the time. Ruth 1:16 Discover the ingredients that create a successful marriage, and duplicate them regularly. 1 Corinthians 13:8 13/Ephesians 5:25 Pay the ones first that you owe the most..god, your in laws and your spouse. Romans 13:7 8 Block out time for you and your spouse alone (at least once or twice a month) when neither the bible, bills, nor business will be discussed. Deuteronomy 24:5/Genesis 2:18 Remember that you are in partnership with God in saving the world through your family. 2 Timothy 2:2 Don t allow your children to come between you and your spouse. Always remember that our children are short term goals, but our spouse is a lifetime goal (until death do us part.) Genesis 2:21 24 Remain free from manipulation or control by your parents.

4 Genesis 2:24 A successful marriage is like building cars, stick to one model. Proverbs 5:18 19 As God has joined you together, resolve that all the king s horses and all the king s men will never separate you and your spouse again. Matthew 19:6 Stay married for a lifetime.one day at a time. You have no yesterdays, time took them away; Tomorrow may never be all you have is today. Ruth 1:16 Treat your relationship as negotiable, and it is easily lost; treat it as non negotiable and you will find a way to make it work. Isaiah 40:1 5/John 14:16 Agree that divorce is not an option. An attorney can make a viable living without writing a bill of divorcement for you. 1 Corinthians 7:27, 6:1/Malachi 2:16 Why are husband and wife still husband and wife? Because they were cheerful when it was difficult to be cheerful; patient when it was difficult to be patient; and because they pushed on when they wanted to stand still, and kept silent when they wanted to talk, and were agreeable when they wanted to be disagreeable. That was all; it was quite simple and always will be. Ephesians 4:31 32/5:33 Communication Available to each couple is the throne of God. Approach it daily, both together and individually. Hebrews 4:16/Philippians 4:6 7 Pray for your spouse regularly. Matthew 1:24 25/Luke 18:1 An affable attitude will keep pot holes out of your path of communication. James 3:16 18 Never let an opportunity pass to say a kind and encouraging word to or about your spouse.

5 Ephesians 4:32 Praise your spouse for any achievements in areas where you want them to excel. 1 Peter 3:7 10 Be a good listener. Acts 8:30 To find real and lasting peace in your marriage, be honest with your spouse. Colossians 3:9 17 Keep skid chains on your tongue; always say less than you think. Cultivate a low, persuasive voice. How you say it, often counts more than what you say. I Kings 19:11 12/Proverbs 15:1 Ask questions, more than you make blunt statements. Genesis 3:9 Be careful of your spouse s feelings. Wit and humor at your spouse s expense are rarely worth the effort. And may hurt deeper than you know. Ephesians 5:28 29 My spouse is my friend who will tell me my faults in private. Exodus 4:24 26 Let your virtues speak for themselves, and refuse to talk about your spouse s weaknesses. Luke 6:43 45 Lay all in law jokes aside they gave you your spouse. Exodus 2:11 21 It is better to make promises sparingly and keep them faithfully, than to make them often and keep them seldom. Esther 5:3, 7:1 10 Speak of your home and possessions, not as mine, but ours. It will take time, but cultivate this practice. Genesis 1:26

6 Never ask others to counsel you as a couple without your spouse s prior approval. Genesis 3:1 7/Matthew 19:4 6 Don t give away intimate secrets. Everyone is out to know your business, but keep the family circle closed tightly. John 19:38 42/Proverbs 11:13, 29 Don t hide things from your spouse that could cause conflict down the road. 1 Peter 3:7 Dollars Put money into perspective. It should not be your number one motivation for survival. Luke 8:14 Work out a realistic family budget and stick to it. Haggai 1:3 11/Luke 16:1 12 Don t squeeze the purse. Two can t live as cheaply as one, unless it s a flee and his dog. 1 Timothy 6:10 Money will buy a fine dog, but only love will make him wag his tail. Ephesians 5:1 2 Emotions Two marks of a secured spouse are giving and forgiving. Matthew 6:14 15/Luke 6:38 Atune yourselves to the example of Aquila and Priscilla. They went together, worked together, and worshipped together. Ecclesiastes 4:9 12 Make your spouse your best friend, your marriage will thrive not merely survive. Genesis 2:24 Make sure that intimacy and emotional relationship in the marriage is greater than any other.

7 Ephesians 5:22 31 Watch out for the complications that pals can bring into a marriage. Esther Chapters 1 & 2 Never end your honeymoon. Deuteronomy 24:5 Arouse your spouse with a kiss early if at all possible. Song of Solomon 4:11 For some, romance seems to bud in courtship, blossom in the honeymoon season, and fade during the early years of marriage. Re ignite your romantic life together. Ephesians 5:1 2 God starts the fire, we must keep it burning. Song of Solomon 1:15 17 Remember the three biblical reasons for sex: human parenthood, human partnership, and human pleasure. Genesis 1:28, 2:18/Song of Solomon 5:16, 7:1 6, 8:1 3 Learn how to unwrap the gift of sex. Hebrews 13:4 Remember that your body is for your spouse s pleasure. 1 Corinthians 7:4 God commands you to fulfill your spouse. Do it tenderly and affectionately. 1 Corinthians 7:3 Tell your spouse how they can fulfill your needs. Husbands desire honor and respect from their wives. Wives desire intimacy and love. 1 Peter 3:6, 2: 17/Ephesians 5:28 29 Some Saturday morning chores are more enjoyable than others.

8 Proverbs 5:15 23 Make sexual intimacy mutually satisfying and enjoyable. 1 Corinthians 7:1 5 To keep temptation from your marriage door: have sex regularly. Deuteronomy 24:5 Abstain from sexual intimacy (for a time) only if you both agree. 1 Corinthians 7:5 Restore sexual relations with your spouse as quickly as possible to avoid satanic attack. 1 Corinthians 7:5 They say that sex is even better after 50, or was it 60, or 70. Song of Solomon 7:10 13 Friction Don t feel your marriage has failed because of difference. You will have them, but never let the sun go down on your differences. They can always be solved through talking it out as two mature Christians, and committing them to God in prayer. Use them as opportunities to become more compatible. Ephesians 4:26 When things go wrong, as they sometimes will, don t go wrong with them. Proverbs 4:14 Never seek counsel from someone unqualified to help you; rather be students of those who have succeeded before you. 2 Corinthians 2:13 15/Titus 1:10 11 Learn from the mistakes of other marriages. You can t live long enough to make them all yourself. Ephesians 4:31 32, 5:22 27 Don t wait for a crisis to discover what is important in your spouse. Proverbs 14:1 3, 31:23 27 In an effort to resolve conflict, attack the problem, not the person.

9 Psalms 19:13/Hebrews 12:4 Be solution oriented rather than problem oriented. Take charge of problems instead of waiting for them to work themselves out. Proverbs 15:10, 32, 17:10/1 Timothy 4:2 Keep an open mind on all debatable questions. Discuss, don t argue. It is a mark of superior minds to disagree and yet be friendly. Colossians 4:6 If you must argue, do it in private, even out of the presence of the children. Proverbs 13:10 Before flaring up at the faults of your spouse, pause and count ten of your own. Matthew 7:3 4 Be careful that your marriage doesn t become a duel instead of a duet. Romans 14:19 A spouse never choked by swallowing pride. Job 2:15 16/Proverbs 16:18 When you are wrong, be willing to admit it and say I m sorry. Without saying, If. When you are right be easy to live with. James 5:16 The spouse who apologizes should have the last word. Matthew 18:21 22/Ephesians 4:32 Anyone who cannot forgive his/her spouse breaks the bridge over which he himself must pass. Matthew 6:14 15 Guard against vengefully using past hurts to retaliate against your spouse. Ephesians 4:31 32 Don t dwell on your mistakes, they don t allow room for growing

10 2 Corinthians 5:17 When we love our spouses, we are in the perfect will of God. When we like our spouses, we are in the perfected graces of our spouse. God commanded us to love our spouses, but it is up to us to like them. Liking our spouses will answer a question that our spouses have long wanted to ask, but didn t know how. The question is Do you like me? Remember, loving is commanded by God, but liking is left to you. Do you like your spouse?