[Insert image here] Flirtation today. How the Dutch flirt in their 20s

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1 [Insert image here] Flirtation today How the Dutch flirt in their 20s

2 2 Contents 1. Main findings Methodology Flirtation is a fun game How do the Dutch flirt in their 20s? The communal flirter Communities of Flirting friends as sources of knowledge... 8 A. Defining communal flirters the communal flirting index... 9 B. Who are communal flirters? Gender differences How important are looks compared with social skills? Who is more flirtatious, men or women? Should women make the first move? New rules of flirting Where do people flirt and why? Is technology replacing physical flirting?... 17

3 3 1. Main findings What is flirting? It is a fun and playful activity mainly used to attract the opposite sex or as a means of negotiation People between the age of 20 and 29 describe flirting as exciting, fun, pleasant. For the most part, flirting for men serves the purpose of attracting the opposite sex. 6 in 10 agree that they flirt to attract the opposite sex, and about 4 in 10 flirt to find a partner. Alternatively, flirting is also a form of entertainment about 6 in 10 Dutch between 20 and 29 flirt just for fun. As such, for about a quarter of all Dutch between the age of 20 and 29, flirtation is part of a night out. Flirtation for 15-20% of people between the age of 20 and 29 is also a means of negotiation: 2 in 10 respondents have flirted before to get themselves out of tricky situations or to get the best deal or discount in a shop. And 15% flirt to get themselves out of trouble. The Dutch are remarkable compared to other Europeans in that they flirt very little to get around paying for a drink. It seems to be a taboo to flirt in professional situations. A playful approach is voted the most effective approach in terms of flirting approaches. 8 in 10 Dutch in their 20s say that a playful approach works best when they flirt. 72% of all respondents focus on not coming across as too aggressive when they flirt. And 65% all respondents agree that their flirting is subtle rather than obvious. How do young Dutch learn how to flirt? Communities of flirting are groups of friends that are more interested in flirting and hence learn from each other through talking, helping each other and going out to flirt with their friends around. The majority, 60% of young Dutch, state that they learned flirting by doing: their main source of learning is personal experience. In learning theory, Communities of Practice are a source of innovation and creativity. These communities are groups of people who have a mutual interest and share knowledge about this interest. As a result, they are more innovative and creative when it comes to their shared interest. We found that a lot of information about flirting is not shared verbally but in Communities of Flirting: o Friends are the second most important way to learn about flirtation for young Dutch. A quarter of them have learned how to flirt through friends either male or female. o Friends hold a lot of information about their friends flirting behaviour because they have cooperated when flirting. 35% have set their friends up with someone they liked. 22% flirt with other people when they are together with their friends. And 15% state that they have picked up how to flirt from their friends. Less knowledge is shared verbally than through practice and practicing happens mainly when with friends. Building on a measure called the Communal Flirting index, we found that: o o Dutch men are more communal about flirting than Dutch women. Communal flirters are more likely to say that flirting comes to them naturally and they can also be more easily tempted into a flirt.

4 4 o Communal flirters furthermore use flirting more in situations that are not about attracting the opposite sex. They flirt to negotiate their way out of tricky situations like when they are about to get a parking ticket or to get a deal in a store and mainly just for fun. o Communities of flirting practice flirting more. So, our friends are the most important source of information when it comes to flirting. They also help us by setting us up with a potential object of desire, and flirting can be used as a means of negotiation. Gender differences The importance of the Social guy Social studies highlight the importance of first impressions when we meet a new person. Trends such as the much discussed rise of the Metrosexual man, the increased pressure to look good, the rising number of male grooming and beauty products, and an increasing amount of plastic surgery amongst males in would suggest that appearance and looks is are the key success factors for men today. The data shows that despite the rise of the beauty-conscious man in the past years being an attractive flirting object requires more than just looks. 43% of women vote being funny or witty as one of the three most important attributes in a man for them to flirt with him. Wit and humour are actually the most important attributes for women, it is the number 1 reason for women to flirt with a man. Interestingly, most men are aware of what women want in a flirt. The ability to entertain is as important for a man to flirt with a woman as his looks are. Who flirts more, men or women? Our research shows little support for major differences between men and women with regards to how often they say they flirt or why they would. Both genders can also be tempted into flirting easily and there is no significant difference between genders when it comes to whether flirting is something that they feel is natural for them. Interestingly, the data shows some differences as well though. Women tend to flirt more just for fun while men tend to flirt more to progress in their job and to impress their friends. 12% of men flirt to progress in their job while only half, 6% of women do so. And 9% of men state that they flirt to impress their friends. Only 6% of women say they do this. Should women make the first move? Being approached is attractive for about 4 in 10 of both men and women. However, a substantial proportion of women categorically expect men to speak to them first. 32% of women think that men should make the first move. Furthermore, women give men very little credit for being courageous, they seem to assume that it is natural for a man to be the approaching party: only 12% of women think it is admirable for a man to make the first move. This compares with 21% of men who say that women who make the first move are admirable. New rules of flirting where and how? Most flirting still happens face-to-face. However, new communications technologies are becoming more relevant because flirting online is easy. New media are not likely to replace physical flirting though because people find it more enjoyable to flirt face-to-face than via digital media. Where do people flirt and why? Most flirting happens on a night out. 62% of all respondents agree that they flirt in a pub or a bar. This is due to the fact that bars and pubs are a setting that make it easy and enjoyable to flirt:

5 5 The majority of respondents (55%) state that it is easiest to flirt in a bar, pub or club. And when asked where respondents found it the most enjoyable, the bar, pub or club again ranked highest. 24% of all respondents even say that a good evening out involves flirting. 3 in 10 young Dutch would also flirt in supermarkets something that was mentioned a few times in our qualitative research as well. Flirting is a smart way of spending the time in the check-out queue or while shopping around for groceries. Especially communal flirters are more likely to flirt in locations such as grocery stores. Is technology replacing physical flirting? Most Dutch still flirt physically first. In addition, almost a further quarter use instant messengers though and about 20% are already flirting through social networking sites as well as physically flirting. Given the pick-up of social networking in the Netherlands, the importance of the internet is likely to increase in the future. It is interesting that physical locations are more enjoyable than those that are online. Only two thirds of all Dutch flirting via instant messengers enjoy being flirted with online. Only half of all flirters on social networks enjoy it. However, 100% of those flirting in bars enjoy it as well, 91% of those flirting at dinner enjoy it and even 88% of those flirting in supermarkets find it enjoyable. The main merit of online flirting is that it is easier but it does have some downsides as one of our interviewees summarises: I think that [who we flirt with] is more obvious now because of social networking and because everyone is connected in some sort of way. So it is just more out there than it was before. I think 20 years ago it would be much easier to spend a night with a girl and it would not go out in the open whereas now everyone is connected to each other so if it happens everyone knows just like that. (Interviewee, 24) 1.1. Methodology At the Future Foundation, we mainly research social, cultural and economic change: the things that are prevalent in society. This report looks at how young Dutch in their 20s flirt. For this report, we spoke with six single men in their 20s who said that they liked and were interested in flirting. We also surveyed 500 Dutch respondents between the age of 20 and 29 online half were male, half female. The survey was run in February We were interested in the following: How do Dutch in their 20s flirt today? How do they learn how to flirt? What is the role of friends in flirting? What are gender differences when it comes to flirting? What is the role of flirting during a night out? How has technology changed the way the Dutch in their twenties flirt? The behaviour reported in this survey is by definition self-stated. So, in cases when observed, actual behaviour might deviate from the responses, the statements participants gave are an indication of perceptions and attitudes towards flirtation amongst those in their 20s.

6 6 2. Flirtation is a fun game What is flirting? And why do young people do it? When asked what they associate with flirting, most respondents describe it as something positive. Flirting is exciting, fun, pleasant. o o o o o The most important reason for males to flirt is to bewitch women 6 in 10 agree that they flirt to attract the opposite sex, and about 4 in 10 flirt to find a partner. This is also the case for women. Flirting is a game to appeal to the opposite gender. The second most important motivation is that it is a form of entertainment about 6 in 10 Dutch between 20 and 29 flirt just for fun. Perhaps surprisingly, slightly more women flirt just for fun. As such, for about a quarter of all Dutch between the age of 20 and 29, flirtation is part of a night out. They always flirt when they go out. Finally, the third motivation for flirtation goes beyond just charming the opposite party. Flirtation for 15-20% of people between the age of 20 and 29 is also a means of negotiation: 2 in 10 respondents have flirted before to get themselves out of tricky situations or to get the best deal or discount in a shop. And 15% flirt to get themselves out of trouble. The Dutch are remarkable compared to other Europeans in that they flirt very little to get around paying for a drink. Only 14% flirt to get a free drink and the difference between genders is not significant. So, most young Dutch are happy to get the bill and flirtation is not used to get around it. It seems to be a taboo to flirt in professional situations. Few admit to having flirted to progress in my job. Similarly, flirting to impress friends is not something many young Dutch would admit only 9 and 7% flirt for this purpose, respectively. 0% 10% 20% 30% 40% 50% 60% 70% I flirt to attract the opposite sex I flirt just for fun 62% 59% I flirt to find a partner 43% I always flirt when I go out I have flirted before to get myself out of tricky situations I flirt to get the best deal or discount in a shop I flirt to get myself out of trouble I flirt to get a free drink I flirt to progress in my job I flirt to impress my friends 26% 23% 20% 15% 14% 9% 7%

7 How do the Dutch flirt in their 20s? So how would people describe the approach? How do young Dutch flirt? A playful approach is voted the most effective approach in terms of flirting approaches. 8 in 10 Dutch in their 20s say that a playful approach works best when they flirt. Women especially rate a playful approach. Playfulness gains support of a full 20% more than any other approach. Provocation drawing attention is the second most important approach. 6 in 10 Dutch say this is part of a good approach. The third most important attribute for successful flirting is confidence. Women especially count it as the most effective in flirting. Flirting is also something that is a pleasant surprise, something that happens in the moment when an appealing partner is identified. 77% of all respondents said they never plan when they are going to flirt in advance. So, initiative helps. The most important approaches are a smile (82%), an impromptu hi (72%), or a simple introduction of oneself (62%). In terms of pickup lines, only a quarter use them. Only 5% have a favourite pick-up line. Our qualitative interviews suggest that pickup lines are a way to make the other person laugh rather than to seriously seduce the desired other. This is underpinned by the fact that 72% of all respondents focus on not coming across as too aggressive when they flirt. And 65% all respondents agree that their flirting is subtle rather than obvious. So, flirting is not something that is necessarily denoted by an official introduction such as a pickup line

8 8 3. The communal flirter One of the most interesting parts of this study was to look at how the circle of friends influences the flirting behaviour of young Dutch Communities of Flirting friends as sources of knowledge Learning theorists and researchers have different models for how learning can be done. Constructivist theory focuses on the social process through which knowledge is constructed over time. Learning is therefore not something that is verbally transmitted and received at once, it evolves over time and from different sources. One useful theory was developed by Lave and Wenger, that of communities of practice. Communities of Practice are a source of innovation and creativity when it comes to solving a common problem or endeavour. Learning how to flirt in many cases happens in Communities of Practice: Most respondents agree that flirting is something that can be learned. Yet only a small minority, 6% have ever received a book about flirtation from their friends. The majority, 60% of young Dutch, state that they learned flirting by doing: their main source of learning is personal experience. Friends are the second most important way to learn about flirtation for young Dutch. A quarter of them have learned how to flirt through friends either male or female. Friends hold a lot of information about their friends flirting behaviour. In fact, 35% have set their friends up with someone they liked. 22% flirt with other people when they are together with their friends. And 15% state that they have picked up how to flirt from their friends. Less knowledge is shared verbally than through practice often together. 0% 10% 20% 30% 40% 50% 60% I am aware of who my friends are attracted to I have set my friend up with someone he or she liked My best friend and I always flirt with other people when we re together I have learnt some flirting tricks from my friends My friend/s help me get together with people I m attracted to My friends and I give each other advice on flirting techniques Friends have given me books about flirting

9 9 Given how many help books on flirting exist in the market (we would suggest browsing Amazon), it is striking how low the relevance of books, magazines and newspapers really is in terms of serious advice that is taken on-board. Rather, learning how to flirt happens as a social activity while going out together with friends, by actively getting involved by setting friends up and by emulating them. Flirting is not learned by reading. It is something that is learned by doing and this doing is often with friends. To return to the language of communities of practice, flirting is a learning process within a community of friends. Through this community, young people exchange tips, implicit and explicit knowledge. And friends are also emulated, therefore sharing knowledge implicitly as well as explicitly. So young people learn how to flirt by copying and practicing together, rather than only by talking about flirting. The following chapters look at these Communities of Flirting more closely. A. Defining communal flirters the communal flirting index In order to understand the social learning process of flirting within Communities of Flirting, we created a communal flirting index (see box 1). This index allowed us to understand friends that share knowledge about the endeavour of flirting via a number of means better. Box 1: Defining the communal flirting index We used a statistical method to define communal flirters. This description is the aggregate of responses to a number of questions. A communal flirter tends to respond as follows: Disagreement with the statement: Flirting is something private Agreement with: o My friends and I give each other advice on flirting techniques o My friends and I talk about the outcome of flirting more than about the process of flirting o I have learnt some flirting tricks from my friends o Friends have given me books about flirting o I am aware of who my friends are attracted to o My friend/s help me get together with people I m attracted to o I have set my friend up with someone he or she liked o My best friend and I always flirt with other people when we re together From where did you learn how to flirt? A male or female friend I flirt often flirt by using a friend. Having created an additive score, we then split the sample into those that are very, medium and less communal.

10 10 B. Who are communal flirters? The first important finding is that there is no difference between men and women in terms of how much knowledge is shared between friends. Men might not discuss explicitly how they flirt but they have ways of learning from and teaching their friends how to flirt, and collaborating to facilitate flirting. The first finding is that Communities of (flirting) Practice may be female or male but men seem to share more information and help each other more than women. Men and women share as much information about flirting, set their friends up to similar degrees, etc. The cliché that only women talk about partners and men do not share knowledge about flirting is not true. Men are more communal about flirting than women. Communal flirting index Female Male 0% 20% 40% 60% 80% 100% Less communal Medium communal Very communal Communal flirters like flirting. They are more easily tempted into it than those who do not share and practice together with their friends. Flirting to them is also something that comes naturally. And a good evening entails flirting for those who share this interest with their friends. 0% 5% 10% 15% 20% 25% 30% 35% 40% 45% 50% I can easily be tempted into flirting Flirting comes naturally to me A good evening out involves flirtation Less communal Medium communal Very communal Naturally, as a segment, communal flirters flirt more in general life. They play the game more often. They flirt to negotiate their way out of tricky situations like when they are about to get a parking ticket or to get a deal in a store and mainly just for fun!

11 11 0% 5% 10% 15% 20% 25% 30% 35% I have flirted before to get myself out of tricky situations I flirt to get the best deal or discount in a shop I flirt to get myself out of trouble Less communal Medium communal High CF index Source: Bacardi Buzz/ Future Foundation research, Base: 500 aged 20-29, Netherland 2010 What all these statements say is that those who make flirting a social activity with their friends are also the ones who flirt the most. "How would you describe yourself?" - Analysed by social flirting index Very communal Medium communal Less communal 0% 10% 20% 30% 40% 50% 60% Very flirty Quite flirty There are communities of flirting practice: friends who share a passion for flirtation and learning more about it. Those who share knowledge are the ones who are most likely to state that flirting is a fun activity. It is a game. And those who actively learn from and exchange tips with their friends are also the ones who are most likely to have made mistakes and embarrassed themselves before.

12 12 4. Gender differences Anecdotal evidence suggests that men and women approach flirting differently. In the following, we look at three main questions and clichés that boys in their 20s seemed to be concerned about according to our qualitative research How important are looks compared with social skills? What do women want when they flirt? Social studies highlight the importance of first impressions when we meet a new person. Trends such as the much discussed rise of the Metrosexual man, the increased pressure to look good, the rising number of male grooming and beauty products, and an increasing amount of plastic surgery amongst males in would suggest that appearance and looks is are the key success factors for men today. The young would be amongst the first to make these changes. Our research highlights that even amongst the younger generation - looks by themselves do not guarantee flirtation. Flirting goes beyond the first impression. Our interviewees describe flirting as something more like a dance during which both partners check out whether the interest is mutual. Flirting is a mutual thing. Seeing if there is a response as well. So if you like a girl and start talking to her, you then see if interest and attraction are coming back. [Male, 22) We asked women what they thought were the top characteristics that made them flirt with men. Equally, we asked men what they thought attracted women to them. The following table shows the top 5 attributes. Top 5 attributes that make men attractive What type of men women would flirt with Funny / witty Friendly face Well-groomed Attractive face Confident What characteristics men think will make them a target of flirtation Attractive face Funny / witty Well-groomed Friendly face Confident prompted list of 10 attributes Firstly, the data shows that despite the rise of the beauty-conscious man in the past years being an attractive flirting object requires more than just looks. 43% of women vote being funny or witty as one of the three most important attributes in a man for them to flirt with him. Wit and humour are actually the most important attributes for women, it is the number 1 reason for women to flirt with a man. In comparison, men rank fun and wit as the second most important attribute that they think makes women flirt with them, 46% say that being funny or witty is amongst the three most important attributes for why women flirt with them. So there is a general awareness that the ability to entertain is as important for a man to flirt with a woman as his looks are. One of our interviewees explains this further: Well, if she is not your kind of girl and you have nothing to say to her then it will end in 15 minutes because it is not going to work. (Interviewee, 25)

13 13 Secondly, young men in their twenties are aware of what they need to do to be attractive. The big divide between Mars and Venus does not seem to permeate into flirting. At least in the theoretical sense, men in their twenties know what women want (when flirting): funny and witty men with friendly, attractive faces are the preferred model. Attributes such as physique, your ability to dance, dress style or social standing matter a lot less Who is more flirtatious, men or women? Urban legend has it that women flirt more than men. Our research shows little support for major differences between men and women with regards to how often they say they flirt or why they would flirt (as we discussed before, it seems more important how much of a communal flirt they are). "How would you describe yourself? - Quite or very flirty" By gender Female Male Total 0% 20% 40% 60% 80% 100% Both genders can also be tempted into flirting easily and there is no significant difference between genders when it comes to whether flirting is something that they feel is natural for them. 0% 10% 20% 30% 40% 50% I can easily be tempted into flirting A good evening out involves flirtation Male Female Total Flirting comes naturally to me Furthermore, men and women flirt for broadly the same reasons: to attract the opposite sex and to get themselves out of tricky situations. Both exchange knowledge with their friends to equal degrees as we have seen before. Interestingly, the data shows some differences as well though. Women tend to flirt more just for fun while men tend to flirt more to progress in their job and to impress their friends. 12% of men flirt to progress in their job while only half, 6% of women do so. And 9% of men state that they flirt to impress their friends. Only 6% of women say they do this.

14 14 0% 10% 20% 30% 40% 50% 60% 70% I flirt just for fun I flirt to progress in my job I flirt to impress my friends Male Female Total So, to conclude, men and women are equally flirtatious generally. They broadly flirt for the same reasons. However, women flirt more for fun and men flirt more to progress in their jobs and to impress their friends Should women make the first move? We have seen before that Dutch men and women flirt for similar reasons and have similar views about flirting. Who makes the first move though? Being approached is attractive for about 4 in 10 of both men and women. Overall, about half of all young Dutch think that making the first move is a sign of self-confidence. So, a person initiating the conversation with another has a good chance that the other will appreciate the approach. 0% 10% 20% 30% 40% 50% 60% Attractive Knows what she/ he wants A lot of fun The type of girl/ boy I would date Admirable Intimidating Boys about girls making the first move Girls about boys making the first move Desperate

15 15 Our qualitative interviews give the impression that women are waiting for men to make the first move. This is something that our interviewees felt was normal, something they would have to get used to. They expect men to take the first step with a lot of things. [ ] it makes our life a little bit more difficult sometimes [ ] Well, it is not going to change. So if you don t get used to it you won t get anywhere with a girl and you won t have that many chances. (Interviewee 24) The quantitative results support this but qualify these statements further. Women still expect men to speak to them first. 32% of women think that men should make the first move. Furthermore, women give men very little credit for being courageous, they seem to assume that it is natural for a man to be the approaching party: only 12% of women think it is admirable for a man to make the first move. So, men are still expected to know how to flirt in the Netherlands, even if the flirting that follows is equally enjoyable for both genders.

16 16 5. New rules of flirting 5.1. Where do people flirt and why? Most flirting happens on a night out. 62% of all respondents agree that they flirt in a pub or a bar. This is due to the fact that bars and pubs are a setting that make it easy and enjoyable to flirt: The majority of respondents (55%) state that it is easiest to flirt in a bar, pub or club. And when asked where respondents found it the most enjoyable, the bar, pub or club again ranked highest. 24% of all respondents even say that a good evening out involves flirting. Dinners and work are also a good place to flirt for the majority of young people. Perhaps surprisingly, 3 in 10 young Dutch would also flirt in supermarkets something that was mentioned a few times in our qualitative research as well. Flirting is a smart way of spending the time in the check-out queue or while shopping around for groceries. The one area where flirting is strongly rejected is in a job interview something that is consistent throughout the data. One may flirt with colleagues but not when it comes to the important dream job. In which, if any of the following places do you tend to flirt? 0% 20% 40% 60% 80% In a bar, pub or club At a dinner speaking to a person Work or university Supermarket or while running errands Male Female Total Sports club Hobby group In a job interview Flirting is however not something that is planned. It comes about spontaneously when a desirable object of flirtation (with the right characteristics) appears and tempts. 77% of young Dutch do not plan that they will flirt, and 65% do it subtly, and for 20%, the weather can even impact them. They flirt when the sun comes out. So, while flirting is still something that is easiest in pubs and bars new flirtation locations such as the supermarket are acceptable for spontaneous - perhaps subtle - but definitely fun flirtation.

17 Is technology replacing physical flirting? Technology changes the way in which people communicate. What is the role of these in terms of flirtation? The internet has been adopted by a broad demographic group in the Netherlands. Especially the young have led the way in the adoption and use of social networking sites such as Hyves and Facebook. The younger generation uses more media to interact, stay in touch and connect than the older 1. What is the role of new technologies in flirting? The following graph shows just how important online sites and services are becoming as an extension of physical reality. Most Dutch still flirt physically first. In addition, almost a further quarter use instant messengers though and about 20% are already flirting through social networking sites as well as physically flirting. Given the pick-up of social networking in the Netherlands, the importance of the internet is likely to increase in the future. These scores are already higher in other countries where social networking has a higher number of social netwrokers than in the Netherlands. In which, if any of the following places do you tend to flirt? Via instant messegers (MSN, Facebook, ICQ, Skype etc.) Social networking sites 0% 5% 10% 15% 20% 25% 30% On the phone What makes these new media so inviting? The main answer is that it is easy. The following chart shows real and online flirting locations. 1 Older generations are catching up with the young in terms of creating social networking profiles though as our societal tracking service nvision shows.

18 18 In which, if any of the following places do you tend to flirt? 0% 20% 40% 60% 80% In a bar, pub or club At a dinner speaking to a person Work or university Via instant messegers (MSN, Facebook, Supermarket or while running errands Social networking sites On the phone Sports club Where they tend to flirt Where they enjoy being flirted with Where they find it easiest to flirt Hobby group It is interesting that physical locations are more enjoyable than those that are online. Only two thirds of all Dutch flirting via instant messengers enjoy being flirted with online. Only half of all flirters on social networks enjoy it. However, 100% of those flirting in bars enjoy it as well, 91% of those flirting at dinner enjoy it and even 88% of those flirting in supermarkets find it enjoyable. So why should one flirt online? The main merit of online flirting is that it is easier. As mentioned before, the bar is the place where people find it easiest to flirt out of all locations. 81% of all people flirting in bars find it easy. Instant messaging receives the second highest rank though in terms of the percentage of people that flirt via these services and who say it is easy. 64% of all people flirting via instant messengers find it easy. This compares with 41% who do it over the phone and 39% who flirt at dinners and find it easy. So, in terms of means of flirtation, bars, pubs and clubs remain the most popular, easiest and most enjoyable locations to flirt. Instant messengers are easiest. What is important to note though is that technology is not replacing physical flirting. It seems that internet and reality seem to complement each other rather than replace each other. One factor that we mentioned was the enjoyment factor that comes from meeting people face-to-face rather than through information technologies. The other may also be that there is a risk associated with flirting online especially to young men who want to see the person they are flirting with. [I only flirt] with people that I have already met in real life and then you add them on Facebook because [ ] it is a lot easier to stay in touch with people you have met once, because you probably would not call her up because that would be too much but it is really easy to drop a line on Facebook. (Interviewee, 25) Another possible inhibitor to the rise of Facebook as a flirtation tool is that it creates transparency. As our lives and flirtation moves online, record of our actions and words are created. And this may be visible to the world. One of our interviewees pointed this out during the conversation.

19 19 I think that [who we flirt with] is more obvious now because of social networking and because everyone is connected in some sort of way. So it is just more out there than it was before. I think 20 years ago it would be much easier to spend a night with a girl and it would not go out in the open whereas now everyone is connected to each other so if it happens everyone knows just like that. (Interviewee, 24)