Managing Conflict for a Better Result

Transcription

1 Some resources I found useful over the years include: Managing onflict for a Better Result Alex Rosenau, DO, PE, FAEP Senior Vice hair, Dept of EM, LVHN Assistant Medical Director, LVPG Eastern EMS o-medical Director Founding Program Director Emeritus, LVHN EM Residency Associate Professor, Morsani School of Medicine, USF President Elect, American ollege of Emergency Physicians Getting to YES: Ury and Fisher Primal Leadership: Daniel Goleman How to Deal with People You an t Stand: Kirschner & Brinkman rucial onversations Articles from Harvard Business review: Managing Oneself: Drucker Emotional Intelligence: Goleman Daily operations team Nurses Physicians, Physician Assistants, NP s Techs Administrative partners Support partners, Escort Registrars Greeter Volunteers Psych eval service, social worker We are being judged by a new yardstick; not just how smart we are, or by our training and expertise, but also how well we handle ourselves and each other. Daniel Goleman, Ph.D. Working with Emotional Intelligence ivility ollegiality ollaboration ommunity 1

2 We judge ourselves on our intentions. Others judge us based on our behavior. Self Management How many times have you lost your cool in the past couple of months? Over what? What sorts of organizational changes have you found easiest and most difficult to accept? Disney Leadership Institute I present myself in a form suitable to the relationship I wish to achieve with you Luigi Parandello Emotional Awareness Recognizing One s Emotions and Their Effects Know which emotions you are feeling and why Realize the links between your feelings and what others think, do, and say Recognize how your feelings affect your performance Have a guiding awareness of your values and goals Understanding Others Sensing Others Feelings and Perspectives, and Taking and Active Interest in Their oncerns Are attentive to emotional cues and listen well Show sensitivity and understand others perspectives Help out based on understanding other people s needs and feelings You can observe a lot by just watching Yogi Bera onversations: Stories we tell, stories we hear in our head rucial: Facts in question, emotions run high, outcome is important Stressful: use clarity, neutrality, temperance: fight tactics not people Persuasive: Discovery, preparation, dialogue, framing, finding common ground and compromise Blind Spots Blind ambition Unrealistic goals Relentless striving Drives others Power hungry Insatiable need for recognition Preoccupation with appearances Need to seem perfect People say I don t take criticism very well, but I say what the hell do they know Groucho Marx 2

3 Develop Verbal Skills Free flow of information Self Disclosure--communicate shared experiences Barriers to Listening Skills Noisy environment Frequent interruptions The Speaker -language barrier ultural competency and Personal Prejudice-- our tendency to evaluate the speaker rather than evaluating the complaint Hand-offs R: Recommendation, S: Situation, B: Background, A: Assessment, R: Recommendation 3

4 Personality types PRATIAL ANALYTIAL SOIAL ONEPTUAL Perfectly competent people can ignite intense reactions when they have different types. Awareness of that allows for managing relationships in a positive manner Four Intents: Right upper Quad Task/Aggressive Behaviors based on: Passive Task Focus Aggressive Intent: to get it done. If prevented from that, Behavior becomes controlling Tanks, Snipers and Know it alls Right lower Quad: People/Aggressive Intent to get appreciated If prevented Behavior becomes attention seeking Grenade, Sniper, Think they know it all Left lower Quad /passive Intent to get along If prevented, becomes Behavior of approval seeking Yes, Maybe, Nothing people 4

5 Left upper Quad: Task focussed/passive Intent: to Get it right If prevented, Behavior becomes perfectionist Whiner, No person, Nothing person The 10 most Unwanted List Tank Sniper Grenade Know-it-all Think they know-it-all Yes person Maybe person Nothing Person No person The whiner Dealing with people you can t Stand Brinkman, Kirschner People Quick review: WHAM!! Perception: conflict lies in our heads Facts, truth are critical, BUT it s how we see the facts that determines our reactions Emotional intelligence: Understanding and taking responsibility for our emotions and those of others Tools: Johari window, Meyers Briggs, the Four s onversations: rucial, stressful, persuasive, RSBAR Listening, c eyes and ears: observing non-verbal cues Psychology: Personality types, intents, fall back behaviors onflict management and negotiation Positions and interests Methods: De-personalize, disentangle, BATNA, creating options, recognizing and addressing tactics, principles and values 5