1 Preface not THE ONLY THE BEST

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2 1 Preface Various techniques on doing Step Four are afloat these days, ranging from scribing a long and drawn out biography to writing 240 answers from a questionaire pamphlet. I know not how effective these methods may be, but I do know many of the people our group members have sponsored from the Big Book directions have been continually sober, some since the 1970s. This pamphlet is not meant to explain THE ONLY, or even THE BEST way, for which to sponsor newcomers through Step Four, rather to set forth, for your examination, some of the tools that our Fourth Dimension Group has found helpful and productive. Our group, here in Richmond, Indiana, generally sticks to the clear-cut directions from the Big Book, but as you will read, we have also made good use of certain fellowship tools as well. Our Fourth Step Chart is designed to make the 4 th Step process easy to understand and workable. The information therein is directly from page 65. We believe the horizonal style listing makes for much easier comprehension. Our Fourth Dimension Group idea started in Palm Beach, Florida, during the mid-1980s where yours truly - ten years sober at the time learned how to really put the Big Book information in action when sponsoring newcomers. I was taught by an ex-la Rams football player, Del H., now deceased. I shall be eternally greatful for his sincere teaching. After relocating in Santa Monica, California, in 1987, A few AA members and I began using Del s techniques. We began to rocket newcomers through the steps, often in two sittings. Our new meeting grew by leaps and bounds and within the first year we started presenting Big Book 12-Step workshops all around Los Angeles. In 1989 my then wife, Deanna, and I moved to Richmond and continued with the same type meetings and workshops around Indiana and Ohio with expanding success. Many new Big Book 12-Step meetings have been spawned following our efforts. To locate these meetings please visit our website -- We encourage you to duplicate this pamphlet, but if you would rather order a copy rstonebraker212@insightbb.com You may also phone We hope to have this on our website soon. Of course, there is no charge. My only hope is that you will find these sponsorship ideas useful. Bob S.

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4 3 Forward In early sobriety I decided to do my very own and special Fourth Step off the wall, so to speak. This resulted in almost ordering a gin & tonic thank God I didn t. Luckily, a new sponsor, Carl R., took me under his wing and rocketed me into the step process el pronto. Directly after praying the Third Step Prayer together, he pointed out the page 64 instructions to do Step Four at once! But then came a seeming stumbling block on that same page; it indicated that I was to take stock honestly. Now, I had the sort of dishonest mind that told me a week before it would be a fine idea to have a gin & tonic after the parade on Hollywood Boulevard.. How could such a dishonest mind that didn t realize what it was thinking write an honest inventory? It was thought I would be incapable a true assessment; that I was likely to exaggerate certain things and leave the more unflattering things out altogether. Thank God, Carl didn t ask me to write the good things about myself - that could have filled pages! The decision was for yours truly not to write the inventory at all, I was to allow God to do the writing!! Carl brought out four sheets of paper and had me head them illustrated on the opposite page. It was explained that this was not Step Four but only a method of allowing honesty to flow into writing that could not change. Step three was a very dramatic event for me and I had that great effect mentioned on page 63. I am very happy that this spontaneous writing was started at once allowing that great effect to completely dominate my emotions. I was sent home to complete the automatic writing; twenty minutes afterward more honesty lie scribbled on that paperwork than weeks of conferring with my good-keen-intelligent-alcoholic mind could have produced. I am so happy that I didn t wait till the next day when the great effect would have worn off. During the next week other things to be added came to me, but by the next weekend I had ample honest information to begin my Step four. I sometimes think of this automatic writing as Step Three and a half it is not Step Four yet, only available honest essential information. Some argue that this idea does not come from the Big Book, But I answer that we are told to take stock honestly but are not told how to do this. Letting God do the writing is an old AA practice, Please read the Appendix in the back pages. I have since sponsored many newcomers into the 12-step process and I have never failed to have them write this prelude to Step Four (See adjacent page) which we sometimes call Step Three and a half. Of course there are those who fell as though by using this tool they are not following the Big Book directions. Such nattering nabobism is countered by the realization that the Book asks us to take stock honestly, but it doesn t explain how a dishonest mind can do this. There are certainly many acceptable methods of taking an honest inventory: this is one of them.

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6 4 Step Four Begins: Whether or not you have decided to use the spontaneous writing tool, it is time to begin filling pertinent information on the chart. Explain the difference between plain fleeting anger and the repeating emotions of anger that represent resentment. Have sponsee read on page 64 that... self, manifested in various ways, was what had defeated us, we considered its common manifestations. At this time we are going to learn a tool to face and be rid of the number one offender: Resentment. Other manifestations such as illogical fear, selfishness and dishonesty will be dealt with later in Step Four. Point out the importance of not delaying this step have him/her read: When the spiritual malady is overcome, we begin to straighten out mentally and physically. Do not expose the Fourth Step Chart. Show sponsee how to draw his/her own chart. Otherwise, this exersise may seem like a school test, where they need only to fill in the blanks quickly as possible. Section One: Now have sponsee write who and what they are resentful at down section 0ne. This includes persons,institutions and principles. Explain the difference. The spontaneous writing list will come in handy at the point; at any rate, leave the room to allow time for more reflecton. Section Two: Tell them to describe the cause of resentment in a few words one is even better. Simplicity is the goal and very little talk in necessary during this process. Discourage conversation, but invite short questions. Leave the room, again.

7 Section 3: 5 This section, ( What part of self was hurt or threatened? ) is composed of the following five columns: Self-Esteem Security Ambitions Presonal Relationships Sex Relations These columns are to be checked vertically, for now, because if they are done horizionally the danger exists that the sponssee may dwell too much certain past occurrences. Although such dwelling is counter productive at this juncture, deeper consideration will take place later during this step Four process. Stress the importance of these checkmarks; that they will each be discussed thoroughly in Step Five. There is no good reason to subdivide any one of these five columns, e,g, financial security and emotional security because this will be done in Step Five. It is normal that a sponsees anger will elevate while checking these columns and especally as long-stuffed feelings rise to the surface. Please leave the room during this very emotional time. Return but do not discuss the feelings! Direct the sponsee to the bottom of page 65 and leave him/her alone again during said consideration. Return and have sponsee read page 66 whole pointing out such words as fatal! Hopefully after reading these dire warnings, the sponsees anger will subside as willingness surges and overpowers.. Two easily workable Big Book tools are presented here on page 67 explaining how to face and be rid of repeating thoughts/feelings of anger: One is spirtual; the other logical. #1. Spiritual Tool: Notice the statement that begins this discourse: This was our course. Much popular opinion has it that the Big Book s 12-Steps are a Thou must under pain of drunkeness set of rules. No! Here they are merely offering two tools which have been proven to work for previously successful AA members. Hopefully, Page 66 has rendered the sponsee willing to vigorously grasp these two tools. The first of which is a spiritual tool which includes four short prayers: This is a sick man: It may serve well here have the sponsee consider whether he/she has been, or are still, spiritually sick. If so, how can they position themselves on a pedestal, looking down on those who are of the same ilk? Explain the ego rush of adrenilin the exudes false pleasure from such illusion. Explain why this phenomenon may be addictive.

8 6 How can I be helpful to him?: Though perhaps often heard, Step 4 does not tell us to pray for the persons we resent it tells us to pray for something much more difficult: to pray that God will change us (your sponsee in this case) to such a degree that we will be willing to be helpful to those whom we may dislike or even feel hatred toward. (You may want to disclose the non-step-four prayer by Norman Vincent Peal on page 552 if he or she asks). Explain why this very popular prayer is not Step 4. God save me from being angry: Explain to your sponsee that this is a strong admission of defeat. That he or she is unable to remove these repeating thoughts of anger by themselves - I can t! God, please help me! Thy will be done: Request for the strength to break away from old self will. Leave the room at this juncture and allow the sponsee to pray this four-part prayer in reference to each person, institution or principle (when applicable) on the resentment list. Upon returning explain that this is a tool to be used when the other person was in the wrong your sponsee was in the right. #2. Logical Tool Explain this tool is used when the sponsee is in the wrong and the resent-ee was in the right. Section 4. On the chart: What was the exact nature of my wrongs? Selfish? Dishonest? Selfseeking and frightened? Now go across the chart horizonally, row by row. Tell sponsee to go over this information honestly and not to shirk. Leave the room. Upon returning explain that we have covered how to face and be rid of resentment when others were completely in the wrong, and also when we were completely in the wrong. Discuss how both situations are in very often effect when repeating thoughts of anger begin to torture us. Discuss the statement : The inventory was ours, not the other persons. Explain that this statement refers only to Step Four and not to AA life in general - that, of course, we have to take other peoples inventories in ordinary life. How could we not? Read: We saw our faults and listed them we have already done that with the checkmarks. Then have your sponsee do this: We admitted our wrongs honestly and were willing to set matters straight. This is one reason I think it is best to go directly into Step Five!

9 7 Tools for Facing and Being Rid Of Fear. Explain to your sponsee the importance of being rid of irrational fear; that it is the glue that holds our character defects in place. Our defects will disappear in proportion to the rarefacation the substance of fear. What is rarefaction? Imagine a block of ice placed in a hot pan on your stove. Shortly, the molecules will begin to rotate faster and become further apart, and behold, the ice turns into water. As the process continues the water will evaporate into steam and you will notice the pan is soon empty! If we use the following tool and we commence to outgrow fear our defects begin to evaporate. They may still exist, but not with the intensity of before. This weakened condition allows the rest of the step process to better function. Let s go to page 68: Part One: Have sponsee list fears in column 1. If spontaneous writing has been done, simply transfer from that list, plus allow sponsee time to add to list. You should probably leave the room at this point. Read how self-reliance has failed us. Give examples from your past. Do not allow sponsee to tell about his/hers at this point. That needs to be done in Step 5. When finished write yes beside each fear in the second column. Point out that the fear would not still be tormenting your sponsee if self-reliance had worked. Pray the page 68 fear prayer: We ask Him to remove our fear and direct our attention to what He would have us be. Have sponsee pray this for each fear. (Naturally, leave the room during this time) Point out that is not a one part prayer that he second part will require action on the sponsees part. Point out that this is not a onetime prayer that it will continue in Step 10 for a lifetime.

10 8 Sexual Harms To Others Up till now we have learned the Step 4 Tools for facing and being rid of resentment and irrational fear. Now, comes a tool that may give your sponsee ability and inclination to realize where they have been dishonest and/or selfish, especially in the world of romance. I like to point out that although romance in early sobriety may not be a good idea, the BB on page 68 informs us that we are not the arbiter of another sex conduct and that, God alone can judge our sex situation. The operative words in the first full paragraph of page 69 are included in the bottom graph. To avoid redundancy I will offer only this: Have your sponsee do this graph in the same style as one on resentment. Remember to leave the sponsee alone during the obviously necessary moments of reflection and prayer. When the first four columns are finished, explain how to do column 5, What should I have done instead? Mention that the sponsee need find God s Sex Ideal directly from prayer and meditation; certainly not with his/her good keen intellectual alcoholic mind. (Leave the room) Of course, help the sponsee read all the Step 4 pages as you go through. It is often best not to allow the sponsee to ever see this chart; best to have him/her manufacture their own charts: read, draw and write, etc. That way the are convinced they have done it directly from the Big Book! The bottom of page 70 tell us it is time now to begin our harms to others list. (You may authenticate this by reading sponsee the third full paragraph on page 76.) This is a good way to begin this list: If sponsee has previously made a Spontaneous writing list, search under guilt and some Step 8 candidates may appear. Now have sponsee go to the Resentment graph, column 4 (What Was The Nature of My Wrongs), and some more candidates may become obvious. The fear list is next. Maybe some of the people harmed may be armed and threatening to get even. The sexual harms list is already made out. Write all this information for the 8 th step list, plus whatever new comes out in Step Explain that the grosser handicaps are about where we have been selfish, dishonest, resentful and afraid. Explain that Step 4 is to discover these grosser handicaps. That Step 5 is where we tell our life story, not in Step Four.

11 Automatic or Spontaneous Writing Pass It On -Bill Wilson and the A.A. message pg. 128: They were most ardent too in their practice of meditation and prayer, at least one hour a day, and two hours would be better. They felt that when people commenced to adhere to these high moral standards,then God could enter and direct their lives. Under these conditions, every individual could receive specific guidance.which could inspire every decision and act of living, great or small. Following meditation and prayer, they practiced what they call a quiet time, asking God for specific directives. Pencil in hand, they wrote down what came into their minds; one could do this alone,with his family, or in the company of a like-minded group which was called a team. Such a way of life was urged upon all comers. It was a very dynamic and sometimes a very aggressive evangelism. From the same book pg : Bill wrote the 12 Steps while lying in bed at 182 Clinton St. with pencil in hand and a pad of yellow scratch paper on his knee. He wrote them in bed said Lois, not because he was very sick, but he wasn t feeling well, and if he could lie down, he did: He got into bed - that being the best place to think. As he started to write, he asked for guidance. And he relaxed. The words began tumbling out with astonishing speed. He completed the first draft in about half an hour, then kept on writing until he felt he should stop and review what he has written. By many an historians account Ebby sat at The Calvary Mission one November morning 1934 and did his morning guidance as was standard practice of the Oxford Group (it s actually our 11 th step also). Bill Wison kept coming to Ebby in his morning guidance. In obeying his guidance, Ebby called Bill Wilson that morning-and here we are today. Tom Powers Sr. was sponsored by Bill Wilson. Tom was a member of the East Ridge Community in Haskins NY. Tom helped Bill write the 12x12 (along with what Bill called automatic writing from a Benedictine Monk from several centuries ago.)

12 10 Afterward Dear Sponsor: Although you may decide to forgo the spontaneous writing and use other techniques to bring about newcomer honesty, we hope you will find at least some of our group s ideas and practices to be pragmatic during your upcoming 4 th Step endeavors. Many sponsors prefer to use the vertical method of display as offered on page 65, of the Big Book - the results should be the same, if not a bit more complex. We simply think that the horizontal graph easier to comprehend, and that it helps keep the highly emotional facts in visual reading order, as well as providing uncomplicated reference for later discussion. We sometimes have found it expedient to deviate from standard practice, e.g., when a sponsee is illiterate, a tape recorder may come in handy or the sponsor may decide to do the writing. For mentally handicaped members, we have sometimes simply helped them with the spontaneous writing and then went directly into Step Five, using no incomprehensible graphs, explanations, or other writing at all. Some of these members have been sober for many years. Once again, our group does not portend that we have here written the best way, or the you ought to do it this way, method of sponsoring Step Four; we have simply presented some tools that have served us well through the years. Bob S., Fourth Dimension Group of Richmond, Indiana

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