1 PATRON: Joe Flaherty President: Ted Keane OAM Vice Presidents Hon Secretary: Dick Allchin OAM Bob Barr, Graham Levet Hon Treasurer: Bob Dennis Correspondence: PO Box 75, Golden Beach Qld Or (Bob Dennis) Issue 2.07 April, 2007 LEST WE FORGET 5 th April 1842 Japanese aircraft attack Colombo HMS Hector and Tenedos were sunk and dock facilities were damaged minimal loss of life. 8 th April 1940 AB R./E. Edger RAN perished when HMS Glowworm fought her last gallant fight against German Heavy Cruiser Hipper off coast of Norway. 9 th April 1942 Japanese carrier borne aircraft sink HMS Hermes and HMAS Vampire off Ceylon, Commander Moran RAN and 7 sailors killed on Vampire. Considerable numbers killed on Hermes. 30 th April 1915 HMA Sub EA2, Cdr. H. Stocker, sunk by Turkish gunboat in Sea of Marmara. No Casualties. Her crew were taken POW. AGE SHALL NOT WEARY THEM Reunions: RAN Victuallers Glenelg, S.A. October 2007 Contact: John Peters H.M.A.S. HOBART Mildura, November 2007 Contact: Paul McDermott H.M.A.S. ANZAC/TOBRUK Caloundra, October 2007 Contact: Colin Bell Ballina All Ships Reunion 25th Anniversary of First Ballina Reunion Last Weekend of November 2007 Numbers will be strictly limited (around 350) for this event. Those wishing to attend are advised to get in early. Ran discharge certificate: Certificates given today are worthy of framing and are a big improvement on the Certificate that most of us received, a piece of paper with our enlistment details. As many of you have received medals since discharging I recommend that you apply for a certificate that lists your awards. The address for details is available at the Navy Website. Quote of the month: Women and cats will do as they please, men and dogs should relax and get used to the idea. Robert A. Heinlein Sub-Section Welfare Officer: Bruce Neilson has volunteered for this position, any problems please contact Bruce on Ph: or , he can also be contacted by Messdeck Murmurs Editor: Shirley Watson or
2 What was the name of the first warship built for the R.A.N? Here are some clues: Know your Naval History She was commissioned in September Captured the German Freighters Meklong and Brass Monkey in Mioko Harbour New Britain in She was blown ashore in 1934 near the mouth of the Hawkesbury River. The bow and stern sections were later salvaged to be used as part of a memorial commissioned by the City Council of the same name. The second ship to have this name was commissioned in 1940 and sunk by U559 while on passage to Tobruk in November Sadly only 24 of her compliment of 162 survived. The third ship of this name was commissioned in July she served as escort to the Royal Yacht Brittania during the Royal Visit to Australia in She also served as escort to Vietnam in 1968 and again in She was decommissioned in 1991 and sent to S.E. Asia to be broken up as scrap. The fourth ship of this name was commissioned in July 2003 and has seen service in the Persian gulf. She is currently in commission. Answer on page five. Page Two I've travelled down some lonely roads Both crooked tracks and straight, An' I've learned life's noblest creed Summed up in one word "Mate" I'm thinking back across the years, (a thing I do of late) An' this word sticks between me ears You've got to have a "Mate". Someone who'll take you as you are Regardless of your state An' stand as firm as Ayres Rock Because 'e is your mate. Me mind goes back to '42 To slavery and 'ate When Man's one chance to stay alive Depended on 'is "Mate". With bamboo for a billy-can An' bamboo for a plate A bamboo paradise for bugs, Was bed for me and "Mate". mates You'd slip and slither through the mud And curse your rotten fate, But then you'd 'ear a quiet word: Don't drop your bundle "Mate" And though it's all so long ago This truth I 'ave to state: A man don't know what lonely means Til 'e 'as lost his "Mate". If there's a life that follers this, If there's a 'golden-gate', The welcome I just want to 'ear Is just "Good on y' Mate" An' so to all that ask why We keep these special dates, Like "Anzac Day" I answer "why?" We're thinking of our "Mates". An' when I've left the driver's seat, An' handed in me plates, I'll tell ol' Peter at the door I've come to join me "Mates". From the Welfare Officer: War Widows Pension. ( What happens on re-marriage. ) This was a topic of discussion at the last Naval Association meeting, the following should answer the question. Since 29 May 1984 a war widow/widower is entitled to continue to receive war widow/widower s pension Regardless of remarriage. Prior to 29 May 1984 a war widow s pension had to be relinquished on remarriage and a remarriage gratuity was paid. From 1 January 2002 war widows whose pensions were cancelled only because the widow re-married or married on or before 28 May 1984 are entitled to have their war widow s pension reinstated. A wee Glesga boy comes home from school and tells his mother he s been given a part in the school play. Wonderful, whit part is it? she asks. The boy says, I play the part of the Scottish husband. The mother scowls and says, Go back an tell that teacher you want a speaking part!
3 Page Three EPILOGUE (continued) Although the American Air Force had a large number of long range land based fighters by this time, it would be necessary to use every available aircraft carrier and their planes to protect the many vulnerable transports. As well as defence against suicide planes, steps had to be taken to protect the fleet from nearly 300 KAIRYU suicide submarines. These were two man craft with 600kgs of explosive in the nose which were to be used for close in ramming attacks. The remaining 40 conventional submarines were to be used to attack the fleet, along with the 115 KORYU five man suicide submarines. A further 496 KORYU and 207 KAIRYU submarines were, at that time, under construction. One of the most feared, because of the difficulty in detecting them were the KAITENS. These were to be used just off the invasion beaches. The KAITENS were human torpedoes over 60ft long with a warhead of 1600 kg of explosive, and each one was capable of sinking the largest American naval vessel. The Japanese had 120 shore based KAITENS, 78 of which were in the Kyushu area in early August. Finally, in the sea borne attack craft, were almost 4,000 SHINYO motor boats filled with high explosive and ideal for nighttime attacks against troop transports. Any landing craft that survived these combined attacks then had to face the network of beach defences. These consisted of electronically detonated mines planted all over the beaches between low and high water. The divers, called FU- KARYU or crouching dragons were armed with lunge mines each capable of sinking a landing craft up to 950 tons. Thousands of these divers, formerly oyster divers, male and female, could stay submerged for up to 10 hours and were to thrust their explosive charges into the bottom of landing craft, thus acting as human mines. All this was the beginning for the 14 divisions of American troops. Once ashore they had to face 14 Japanese divisions, seven mixed brigades and three tank brigades, plus thousands of Naval Landing forces, the equivalent to the US Marines. Odds would be 3 to 2 in favour of the defenders; well trained and highly motivated Japanese to Americans, if indeed this number even reached the shore. In the earlier landings on the stepping stone route to Tokyo, the odds had usually been two or even three to one in favour of the Americans. In Japan it would be different. By virtue of a combination of cunning, clever guesswork and sound military reasoning the top Japanese military leaders were able to deduce, not only where, but when the US would land on the Home Islands. They therefore positioned their troops accordingly. Unlike the early landings in the Solomons, Tarawa and other islands, the Japanese would, this time, be defending their homeland. The fanatical defence of Guadalcanal, Tarwa, Iwo Jima and all the other islands left no doubt in the Americans minds that they would be up against their most difficult task yet. The Japanese would use every trick they had learned, and possibly a lot more, in the defence of. Kyushu and all other islands making up the most southern of the Japanese archipelago. Apart from fanatical, well trained and equipped troops, there would be the entire civilian population, roused to a frenzy in the name of the Emperor to contend with. Twenty eight million Japanese had become part of the National Volunteer Combat Force. These were the equivalent to the Home Guard. Armed with ancient rifles, lunge mines, satchel charges, Molotov cocktails; even swords, long bows, axes and bamboo spears. Inflamed by the slogan One Hundred Million will die for the Emperor and Nation they were prepared to fight the American invaders to the death. These special civilian units were to be tactically employed in night time attacks, hit and run manoeuvres, delaying actions and massive suicide charges at the American positions. Even without the utilization of Japanese civilians in direct combat, the Japanese and American casualties during the campaign for Kuyushu would be staggering. It was estimated that in the early stage of the invasion, 1,000 Japanese and American soldiers would be dying every hour. The long and difficult task of conquering Kyushu would have made casualties on both side enormous. It can only be guessed as to how monumental the casualty figure would have been had the Americans had to repeat their invasion a second time when they landed at the even more heavily fortified and defended Tokyo Plain the following March. The invasion of Japan never became a reality because, on 6th August, 1945, the entire nature of war changed when the first atomic bomb exploded over Hiroshima. Three days later a second bomb was dropped on Nagasasaki and within days the war with Japan was at an end. Had these bombs not been dropped and had the invasion been launched as scheduled, it is hard not to speculate as to the cost. Hundred of thousands of Japanese would have died in the defence of their homeland. Just as many American Just as many American soldiers, sailors and airmen would have been killed and maimed. Every foot of Japanese soil would have had to be paid for, twice over, with both American and Japanese lives. In retrospect, the one million American men who were originally estimated to become casualties were, instead fortunate enough to survive the war, safe and unharmed. Intelligence studies and realistic military estimates made over forty years ago, and not later day speculation, show quite clearly that the battle for Japan might well have resulted in the biggest blood bath in the history of modern warfare. At best the invasion of Japan would have resulted in a long and bloody siege. At worst it could have been a battle of extermination between two different civilizations. Continued Over.
4 Page Four Far worse would be what might have happened to Japan as a Nation and as a Culture. When the invasion came, it would have come after several months of continual fire bombings on all the remaining Japanese cities and population centres. The cost in human life that resulted from the two atomic blasts would have been small in comparison to the total number of Japanese lives that would have been lost by this aerial devastation. Amongst the hundreds of thousands of American fighting men would have been those of the three Marine Divisions, the 37th, 43rd and 25th Infantry Divisions. All those divisions, a great number of whom were friends, husbands and sweethearts of New Zealanders, were listed to take part in either Olympic or Coronet. And so, what, a great many thought after Pearl Harbour would take anything from five to ten years to complete, had been achieved with the aid of new ideas of warfare, new and often improved weapons, a tremendous industrial effort and at the cost of many thousands of lives in just three years. People whose lives could well be in danger and who had seen friends die, depend on each other for survival They tend to live life to the full at every opportunity. Life is brought down to the bare essentials-nothing else counts. A little more on Johnnies Johnnies exchanged its future Where blue jackets and bellbottoms once dominated, expensively tailored money men from the great financial institutions now dabble in the world of high finance. Royal Naval House in Sydney s Grosvenor Street has become the home of the Futures Exchange in a setting that is knee-deep in naval history. When war raged on most of the oceans of the world, contemplation about their future wasn t something Navy men felt they could indulge in too much over drinks with shipmates at Royal Naval House. So it is ironic that Johhnies as Royal Naval House was universally known throughout the fleet should surrender its colourful Naval past of almost a century to house instead, Tomorrow s Future to use the catchcry of the future s Exchange. As part of the Grosvenor Place complex dominated by the spectacular high-rise glasshouse behind, Royal Naval House has been given a refit befitting any unit of the fleet itself. Much of the musty, historic interior has been demolished or changed but the façade to Grosvenor Street has been magnificently refurnished and given a two-tone colour scheme that picks out to best effect the architecturally attractive windows which features their beautiful stained glass craftsmanship. The White ensign that fluttered above the entrance has long since gone along with the ever-present Naval sentry at the steps. That original entrance though intact has given way to a new point of entry. Royal Naval House was unique in Sydney history especially during world War 11 when sailors from all the warships in harbour streamed across circular quay late each day to have a run ashore and Hiss at the Snakepit at Johnnies. Had he been able to gain access, any enterprising war correspondent could have learned more about the war at sea by listening to eye witness anecdotes being swapped between shipmates there, than ever he could have by dodging shells and torpedoes aboard the ships at sea. The cacophony of noise that was a hallmark of a night at Johnnies has gone now along with another noise that was part and parcel of the scene at Royal Naval House. That was the action-station like reaction that always resulted from the enormous gong that was belted ever quarter of an hour from 0600 by some misguided but well meaning old retired salt, to ensure that matelots endeavouring to recover from the hangover of a night ashore would not miss the boat back to their ship. Conjecture remains as to where the infamous gong finished up. As the immaculately tailored businessmen of today s world of high finance ponder the risks of today s world of high finance ponder the risks of their financial destiny in what is the Sydney Futures Exchange, they are knee deep in a setting where for almost a century men of different generations gambled their own futures not only in the two great global conflicts of the war at sea, but even earlier in the days before Federation when the future path of the colony itself was so uncertain. (From an article in a Sydney Newspaper by Max Thomson) The burned out gynaecologist. A Gynaecologist had become fed up with malpractice insurance and was on the verge of being burned out. Hoping to try another career where skilful hands would be beneficial, he decided to change careers and become an auto mechanic. He found out from the local technical college what was involved, signed up for evening classes, attended diligently and learned all he could. When the time for the practical exam approached, the gynaecologist prepared carefully for weeks, and completed the exam with tremendous skill. When the results came back, he was surprised to find that he had obtained a score of 150%. Fearing an error, he called the instructor saying, I don t want to appear ungrateful for such an outstanding result, but I wondered if there has been an error that needs adjusting? The instructor said, During the exam, you took the engine apart perfectly, which was worth 50% of the total mark. You put the engine back together again perfectly which is also worth 50% of the mark. The Instructor went on to say, I gave you an extra 50% because you did all of it through the muffler.
5 Page Five Madame Aggie Predicts Your Stars For those who have birthdays in April both Aries and Taurus Singles: Couples: Money: Highlights: By Friday, Mercury, Mars, Jupiter, the Sun, Venus and Pluto will be crowded together in this idealistic, fun loving constellation. This means you are entering a fertile period in more ways than one, unfortunately Madame Aggie took her own advice last month and is now too exhausted to explain what that means. See above. A bargain comes your way, grab it with both hands and brag to your friends about how much you saved. A fashion fad returns from your youth, break out the mini skirts ladies, tease and lacquer up the hair, dress your man in that old safari suit and let s party! Aprons. I don t think our kids know what an apron is - The principal use of Grandma s apron was to protect the dress underneath, but along with that, it served as a pot holder for removing hot pans from the oven. It was wonderful for drying children s tears, and on occasion was even used for cleaning out dirty ears. From the chook pen, the apron was used for carrying eggs, fussy chicks and half hatched eggs to be finished in the warming oven, When company came, those aprons were ideal hiding places for shy kids and when the weather was cold, Grandma wrapped it around her arms. Those big old aprons wiped many a perspiring brow, bent over the hot wood stove. Chips and kindling wood were brought into the kitchen in that apron. From the garden, it carried all sorts of vegetables and after the peas had been shelled it carried out the hulls. In the autumn the apron was used to bring in the apples that had fallen from the trees. When unexpected visitors drove up the road, it was surprising how much furniture that old apron could dust in a matter of a few seconds. When dinner was ready, Grandma walked out onto the verandah, waved the apron, and the family knew it was time to come in to dinner. It will be long time before someone invents something that will replace the old time apron that served so many purposes. Colin and Shirley Bell s Trip to Groote Eylandt (Or: tales of an intrepid crab hunter.) On the 6th February Shirley and I packed our bags and off we went up to Groote Eylandt to see our granddaughter, Kylie, and her husband. Groote Eylandt is situated in the Gulf, 2 hours by plane East from Darwin. Run and owned by the Alangula Tribe, mining is a big part of their revenue. Kylie s husband is building a big resort on the Eylandt which also will be a financial success. Fishing will be the main attraction for those visiting the resort. We caught some beaut fish, plenty of varieties and I also went crabbing (they spear them up there). I had eyes in the back of my head as this is big croc country, we went up to waist deep in the water, but I must confess with the slightest splash I just froze and definitely needed a change of underwear by the end of the day. They also go Cray fishing in the same way. We had a lovely week up there, good place to visit and lovely to see our Kylie but a week was enough. Colin Bell. Answer to Know Your History is HMAS PARRAMATTA of which there have been four. Three other RAN Warships have carried their name on four separate occasions. Do you know what they were? The latest three along with HMAS PARRAMATTA are currently in commission with the RAN. Answer next edition of M.M.
6 Page Six Committee Profile - treasurer, Bob Dennis Date joined Navy: 4 th August 1952 as National Serviceman, transferred to RANR January 1953 then periods of full time service from Transferred to Emergency Reserve 1964 then to RANR Culgoa, Shoalhaven, Gladstone, Sydney, Parramatta, Curlew, Queenborough, Arrow, Supply. Various Tenders and Support Craft. Date Discharged: Transferred to retired list 12 December Best Posting: HMAS Curlew-----Was Navigating Officer on commissioning crew, and apart from a great time in UK whilst standing by we had an extremely professional and happy Ships Company and the CO the late Peter James had the happy knack of showing complete confidence and faith in his officers which in turn generated a feeling of pride in both your work and the ship. A very happy and pleasant posting. Worst Posting: Probably HMAS Karangi----- With the initial CO and the 1 st LEUT both being on exchange from the RN and disliking one another intensely to the extent that the 1 st LEUT was not allowed on the Bridge, and as a A/SBLT and the only other Officer it was a long way from anywhere to anywhere at 8 kts when most of the time was spent on the Bridge. Fortunately things improved somewhat with the arrival of an RAN CO but then the boredom of the Monte Bello Atomic tests and the catching up of 2 years corrections to all the ships publications kicked in. Any Memorable Moments: Standing ( the ground was too hot to sit on) at ground Zero shortly after the explosion of Mosaic 2 a 90 kiloton nuclear test with a group of Royal Marines clad in sandals shorts and caps awaiting the arrival of a group of Scientists and Engineers who arrived clad in full protected clothing to tell us what was salvageable. As CO of HMAS Arrow being piped aboard HMAS Stalwart to lunch with FOCAF Rear Admiral Crabbe. The friendships that I made with both Officers and Sailors of the RAN and RANR which are still very current today. Any Embarrassing Moments: In 1959 as a SBLT in command of HMAS Tallarook (GPV968) successfully sailing from Williamstown Dock Yard and up the Tamar River to Bell Bay Jetty executing a perfect berthing starboard side to, except in all my self importance I had forgotten the very strong tide and once the bow line was secured Tallarook did a graceful 180 degree turn to gently end up port side to, much to the amusement of the crew and the many onlookers. What did you do when you left the Navy: Although being a Surveyor by profession I worked for a Swiss owned company Wild (Australia )Pty Ltd as Victorian Manager as well as South Pacific representative for Defence Equipment for the parent company Wild Heerbrugge. Then spent 16 plus years as General Manager of HMAS Cerberus Canteen and associated enterprises retiring in November HMAS VENDETTA REUNION. (From the Scribbler) Congratulations to Richard Jones for putting his hand up two years ago in Hobart to organise the weekend in Caloundra, it was a great success with 185 ex sailors and partners meeting at the Caloundra RSL Club. The food for all three events was of a very high quality and the service from bar staff and those serving at the tables was excellent, bringing compliments from all who attended. As usual I was surrounded by greenies with only one other ex writer (another ex Wran) present. She also had had the good taste to marry a greenie. There were the usual stories related, amazing how even though many of these men can t remember what they had for breakfast that morning and their capacity to drink and stay up late has diminished, the story telling only seems to improve with age. When it came time for group photos to be taken the dib dabs were as usual an out of control rabble, Richard Jones was seen desperately trying to get into the front row by climbing on and over everyone else. (O.K. Richard so I exaggerate a little) Meanwhile the more refined members of the Green Empire took a little coaxing and then lined up with the utmost dignity and good manners. All in all a great weekend next Reunion is in Adelaide in The Preacher had given a talk at the local A.A. Meeting. He placed two glasses on the table and filled one with water and one with top quality whiskey. He put a live earthworm in the water and it swam around, he then put the worm in the whiskey and it shriveled up and died, Now what does that prove? he asked. One old timer said brightly, If you drink good whiskey you won t get worms. Feeling hungry the traveller stopped at the restaurant that displayed UNIQUE Breakfast. He asked the waitress what this was and was told Baked Chickens Tongues. Oh, how disgusting, said the man, I could never eat anything that came from a chicken s mouth. What would you like then sir? Oh just bring me a couple of soft boiled eggs, said the man.
7 Page Seven NAA QLD- ANNUAL STATE CONFERENCE REPORT In company with Dick Allchin I attended the above meeting on Saturday 17 th March and hereby present a brief summary of the activities to the best of my recollection: The main event was scheduled to commence at 1000 and delegates arrived in good time with some bearing the signs of a good prior evening enjoying fellowship and reunion festivities. You will no doubt be pleased to hear that your representatives stood out as being firm of jaw and clear of eye, probably due to our absence from the above activities. The entire morning was taken up with the usual opening formalities ( Welcome, Chaplain s blessing, Roll Call, etc) followed by addresses to conference by ; Les Dwyer National President NAA who opened the conference; Commander Forbes Peters RAN Senior Naval Officer South Queensland Area ; and Glenda Mann representing the Dept Of Veteran s Affairs. In summary, we heard that : The NAA is travelling well and although ways to recruit younger membership numbers is being actively pursued, we can gain some satisfaction that Qld is overtaking NSW in overall numbers. The attempts to gain official recognition of submariners operational service during covert operations continue and a special unit has been formed with this end in view. The members of this unit have a difficult task because of the complex sensitivities involved and an early solution should not be anticipated. White Ensign Magazine as we knew it no longer exists and the NAA based input is now incorporated within the Warship Magazine and after much difficulty and delay the inaugural copy has been received In Country. Members will receive their copy in the near future. Despite all unkind comments and criticism regarding the effectiveness of the Collins Class Submarine, it is emerging as a great success story. The Great Australian Public is unsophisticated concerning the trials and pitfalls which usually accompany the development process of major defence projects and quickly become disillusioned and embarrassed if our scientists don t quickly pull a rabbit out of the hat on each occasion. It is a national pride sort of thing where, as in sport, Australians like to think that we punch above our weight. This can be excused among the uninitiated but the project at one stage received a frightful bagging from many people who were well placed to know better. Hopefully, they are now willing to eat their words as exercises with other naviesprincipally the USN are highlighting the pitfalls in putting all the submarine eggs in the nuclear basket. The ultra quiet Aussie submarine was practically undetectable and carried out attacks on surface (including aircraft carriers) and sub surface forces with embarrassing impunity. It seems that the traditional esprit de corps and teamwork ethic which was encouraged among shipmates is no longer fashionable and members of a mess no longer play as well as work together as in the past. Perhaps this was more prevalent among wardroom mess personnel who spent much of their time in each others company on short leave or entertaining in their mess when visiting other than a home port. Nowadays when leave is piped, the entire ships company( stand fast duty watch) lifts and shifts shoreward, usually to apartment accommodation which has been booked in advance. The ship is seen purely as a place of work. The days when technical personnel were seen as magicians who could fix anything are gone and only the ghost of Nirimba remains. Technicians are now required to be deep diagnosticians and expert communicators so that they can speedily detect a fault and communicate the extent of it to the support facilities which send the requisite parts and\or advice to rectify the problem. Sorry to say but recruiting will stay in the hands of civilian operatives but with increased oversight by some brigadier or other. Ex Commodore De Laat is now a Rear Admiral who is to administer ALL cadet forces. DVA input was delivered at machine gun rapidity and the following items merely pick at the bones of the presentation: The overall organisation will be re-oriented to emphasise a national rather than a state based one ; A survey(?) concluded that Gen X persons are more heavily reliant on the Baby Boomer generation than was the case with previous generations ( but I bet that you already knew that); Better and more widespread access is to be attempted for white and gold card services ; The Dept is to support PTSD stress whether service caused or not; 11 private hospitals accept DVA patients without question; A Younger Veterans Task Force is being established for those under 44 as there is a greater degree of dissatisfaction in that age bracket; Looking at improved communications\ information systems and providing single points of contact where possible; Attempts to be made to smooth the process during transition to civilian life; Extended access to booked car and driver facility and other improved transport arrangements; Continued over
8 Page Eight Extension of period to lodge claims for ferry fares etc to 3 months; and 21% of Dept spending will be spent on commemoration activities this year, in particular regarding the Western Front. After lunch Con Sciacca addressed the meeting. As a long time politician and lawyer he had no trouble in talking off the cuff and treated us to an entertaining melange of reminiscences including his relationship with Paul Keating ( not friendly ) which led to his disappointment when awarded the lower case portfolio of Veterans Affairs (not considered a great career move) and how he turned it around to achieve the triumphant Australia Remembers commemoration. To make it possible in the first place he turned the initial budgetary allowance of $ into $M8 by adroit chicanery in the party machinery much to the disgust of PK, who was stymied from actively opposing it by being reminded of his uncle who had served in WW2. He stated how much he appreciated the award by the Naval Association of Honorary Life Membership, more so than similar recognition by other bodies because he received it after he was in politics. He was unsuccessful at the last election and says that he is glad (but I wonder?). The rest of the meeting was pretty much routine including the election of the Executive which is virtually unchanged except Bruce Campbell (Brisbane) replaced Barbara Snowdon who stood down as Secretary. A quick run down of the resolutions are as follows; Gold Card for all WW 2 WRANS-carried; Ex WRANS who served 1951 to 1972 be also covered for cancer treatment-carried; Fast tracking of Life Subscribers- not carried; Lobby for DFRDB/DFRB biannual adjustments be based on MWATE or CPI whichever is the greater-withdrawn; ANF presented to widows-carried; Gold card for all WW2 survivors-carried Review of war widow eligibility carried, but national president stated such a review focussing on VEA Act sect11-1 is currently under discussion. On the lighter side: An old man and woman stayed married for many years, even though they hated each other. When they argued, screaming and yelling could be heard deep into the night. The old man would shout: When I die, I will dig my way up and out of the grave and come back and haunt you for the rest of your life! Neighbours feared him because they believed he practiced black magic. The old man liked the fact that he was feared. To everyone s relief, he died of a heart attack when he was 98. After the burial, his widow went straight to a bar and began to party, as if there was no tomorrow. Neighbours concerned for her safety asked: Aren t you afraid he may indeed be able to dig his way up and out of the grave and come back to haunt you for the rest of your life? The wife put down her drink and said: Let him dig. I had him buried upside down. The following is a true story!! At a certain private school in Washington DC, there was a problem. The 12-year-pld girls were beginning to use lipstick and would put it on in the toilet block. But being experimental, they would press their lips to the mirror leaving dozens of little lip-prints. Every night, the cleaner would remove them and the next day the girls would put them back. The principal decided something had to be done. She called all the girls to the bathroom and met them there with the cleaner. She explained that all these lip prints were a major problem for the person who had to clean the mirrors every night. To demonstrate, she asked the cleaner to show the girls how much effort was required. He took a long-handled squeegee, dipped it in the toilet and cleaned the mirror. Since then, no more lippie. That then, is the difference between a teacher and an educator. A police officer stops a blonde for speeding and asks her very nicely if he could see her licence. She replied in a huff, I wish you guys would get your act together. Just yesterday you take away my licence and then today you expect me to show it to you!